adventuring into the unknown

so i want to try a threesome..something new i guess. spice up the sex life with hubby a little.
and im getting me and hubby sex toys as well...

need some ideas on how to spice up the sex life...advice.

Not a threesome. That actually tends to make things worse in relationships. (from what I have seen anyways)

That's not how I would suggest you spice up your sex life... but to each their own, I guess...

Quoting Raindancer:" Not a threesome. That actually tends to make things worse in relationships. (from what I have seen anyways)"

*not trying to be a smartass*

but if we both know that there is no way in hell that either would do anything outside of THAT threesome, how would it cause problems?

Quoting Kyleigh'sMommy12:" so i want to try a threesome..something new i guess. spice up the sex life with hubby a little. and im ... [snip!] ... with hubby a little. and im getting me and hubby sex toys as well... need some ideas on how to spice up the sex life...advice."

Yeah if you want to spice things up do not do a threesome. I suggested it with my ex-fiance of 4 years and it ended up being our downfall. Then about 2 years ago I was asked by a high school friend to join her and her fiance in a threesome, I did and it became their downfall. If you want to spice things up, browse the local sex shops and come up with ideas like toys, lotions, and roleplaying with costumes, there's plenty of things to spice up your sex life without an added person.

Quoting Kyleigh'sMommy12:" *not trying to be a smartass* but if we both know that there is no way in hell that either would do anything outside of THAT threesome, how would it cause problems?"

Because your DH just watched you cheat on him right in front of him and the other way around. Like you have to do some soul searching on this one, this cannot be one of those quick decisions you have to talk to your DH a LOT and make sure both of you are on board. If there is even the tiniest amount of doubt in your mind it won't work. You have to make sure you are ok with watching another woman smurf your man and him smurf her and everything. My aunt and uncle tried this and thought they were ok with it but it just destroyed the smurf out of their marriage because they were not 100% sure they were ok with it but both of them wanted the other one to be happy.

Quoting Kyleigh'sMommy12:" *not trying to be a smartass* but if we both know that there is no way in hell that either would do anything outside of THAT threesome, how would it cause problems?"

Trust me, unless you both can fully guarantee that this is what you want, and that no one will get jealous or attached, then a threesome is a BAD idea. It's not for everyone, many women and men are unable to not get jealous about sharing their partners sexually. And the fact that the only reason you'd want to do it is to 'spice up your sex life, you guess', is kind of a hint that your heart is not fully into it... Just think about it long and hard before you bring another partner to the bedroom, even for one night.

Quoting Raindancer:" Because your DH just watched you cheat on him right in front of him and the other way around. Like you ... [snip!] ... out of their marriage because they were not 100% sure they were ok with it but both of them wanted the other one to be happy."

we have talked about it and we both agreed that when we do it, it will be another girl of my choice. he told me to choose the girl, because he didn't want to "get in trouble"..lol...and i told him there is no way i would smurf another guy. and we agreed that it would be another girl. I have enough faith in my marriage and my man, that we can do this and be completely fine.

Quoting LeTs*StArT*a*RiOt!:" Trust me, unless you both can fully guarantee that this is what you want, and that no one will get jealous ... [snip!] ... is not fully into it... Just think about it long and hard before you bring another partner to the bedroom, even for one night. "

 This.
I'm never really a jealous person AT ALL. But, just the thought of DH's dick being inside of another woman WHILE I'm watching pisses me off.

Quoting LeTs*StArT*a*RiOt!:" Trust me, unless you both can fully guarantee that this is what you want, and that no one will get jealous ... [snip!] ... is not fully into it... Just think about it long and hard before you bring another partner to the bedroom, even for one night. "

the me saying "to spice up my sex life..i guess" is me not knowing how to word it exactly...make our sex life better, try new things, being spontaneous...

Quoting Kyleigh'sMommy12:" the me saying "to spice up my sex life..i guess" is me not knowing how to word it exactly...make our sex life better, try new things, being spontaneous..."

A threesome is not the way to be spontaneous. You have to be 100% ok to seeing your spouse's dick in another woman... and you really have to think about it. If you are not 100 and 10 percent ok with your husband having sex with another woman, then it's not a good idea.

If you want to be spontaneous, get a sex swing, get a stripper pole and learn to strip for him, but a threesome is not the definite answer.

Quoting Kyleigh'sMommy12:" the me saying "to spice up my sex life..i guess" is me not knowing how to word it exactly...make our sex life better, try new things, being spontaneous..."

Spontaneous? Then roleplay, have random sex? You never know how it'll go down until it actually happens. A lot of couples, married or not, think that they can handle it, then when it happens they fall apart. Slowly but surely it's what leads up to their downfall. I mean we are no one to stop you from doing what you want, you're a grown woman. We're just giving you our thoughts from personal experiences. Sorry if I sound rude, I'm not trying to be.

Quoting ~Mama*Cakes~:" Spontaneous? Then roleplay, have random sex? You never know how it'll go down until it actually happens. ... [snip!] ... a grown woman. We're just giving you our thoughts from personal experiences. Sorry if I sound rude, I'm not trying to be."

no everyones cool. i was asking advice. lol. maybe i will think it over again. but very confident ill be cool with it...oh well maybe we can try different stuff first

I personally have never had a threesome, but it is definitely something I would be interested in whether or not I would ever do it is a whole different story. I think if you feel confident in your marriage then why not. As for sex toys, DO IT. My SO and I have them and love them!!! My only question is why do you think you're sex life needs spicing up?

Quoting Erin Berlin:" I personally have never had a threesome, but it is definitely something I would be interested in whether ... [snip!] ... sex toys, DO IT. My SO and I have them and love them!!! My only question is why do you think you're sex life needs spicing up?"

because it's BORING..i mean seriously. it rarely happens and when it does, its all about him...i dont know how to explain it...i guess maybe it was where i was pregnant and had the baby..its just not as FUN as it was before baby