Quoting LumpySpacePrincess:" See ... SO knows that ignoring me makes it worse. He just does it cos "He works hard, he doesn't have ... [snip!] ... hold it all in around him and act happy. He actually said that I better not "act crazy" while his family is over here. "
Quoting The Andromeda Strain:" That's not healthy...that's really not healthy...he's not worth your time doll. =["
Quoting LumpySpacePrincess:" He is a good guy though, he just ... Doesn't get it. And he doesn't seem to want to. I think the thing ... [snip!] ... I think the thing is he honestly thinks he should be able to make me happy, and me having issues makes him a "failure" as a SO."
Quoting The Andromeda Strain:" He can't help that you have the problems that you do but YOU certainly can't either! One of the requirements ... [snip!] ... is talking to you is not okay. You're going to end up blaming yourself if you keep allowing him to act like this towards you."
Quoting LumpySpacePrincess:" I already do blame myself. It's my fault for not keeping the house clean enough, it's my fault for him ... [snip!] ... it's my fault for him having to work while I study and not just going out and getting a job, it's my fault for everything."How's the blame game working out for you guys? I imagine it isn't. Tell him this. Deciding blame isn't going to solve anything but compromise will. If there's any way you two can sit down and work out a way to meet in the middle with things like chores then do that as soon as possible. Be sure to keep it light and avoid arguing, name-calling, raising your voices, etc. because that will completely render your conversation worthless. Arguing never accomplishes anything.