Having another child when your older child is special needs.

I have a 3 yr old little girl who has autism. We have been talking about MAYBE having another baby in the near future (like a year or so). I really want my daughter to have a sibling, but I'm am afraid of it maybe being difficult for her to adapt to having a sibling, and trying to take care of an infant when my daughter is so time demanding... I would like to hear from other mommas... Was it hard trying to care for an infant while also tending to your special needs older child? How was/is the experience? Did you have the same questions/fears that have?

My daughter is three and suspected to have autism. She grew up with her brother, and is excited about the new baby. go for it mama. You will find a way to work it out.

My son is delayed and it was hard adjusting for me since it was like taking care of 2 infants. But he adjusted very well.

It can be tough sometimes but it is absolutely worth it!

Thank you so much Mommas!! You ladies just made me more relaxed of the idea  

DS3 is special needs. He can't speak, he uses some sign language, he is in therapy 4 days a week and although he is almost 2 he is like an infant. I am having DD in May and worried how he would adjust, but he's the younger of 3 boys and loves having others to play with so I think she should adjust to another baby well. Go for it!

My boys are 27 months apart. DS1 was dx with autism when DS2 had just turned a year old.

To be honest, it was not as bad as I thought it would be. I was sure that life would be a train wreck, but he completly and totally ignored his brother until the last year or so. DS2 (now 3) does get really jealous of the time we spend on therapies, etc. He's always climibing all over his brothers therapists and trying to get thier attention. They get along awesome now though! I think part of it is because #1 is delayed to be about the age of his younger brother so they "get" each other.

DS was 3 1/2 and had recently been diagnosed with autism when we found out we were expecting a surprise baby. We put ttc on hold when he started showing signs and thought it was best to wait until he had some time in therapies under his belt before trying again.

It's a challenge but I can't say there are more than if he didn't have SN. The good outweighs the bad and they both bring out just an amazing side to one another that really is something to see. Kieran my SN son has no patience anywhere except when it comes to his little brother. He will get on the floor and play with him, taking turns and everything. He shows him how to play with new toys as my younger one has moved onto some 12 month old toys now.


I had all the same concerns. But I really feel like having another one helped his development and they both will be better children and adults with each other in their lives.

don't know if this helps but my oldest (he's 13) has asperger's i had his brother just after he turned 1 and his little sister is about to turn 2 he loves his siblings to death and would do anything for them, and he's very protective of them. He hasn't had any issues dealing with his sibling other than typical rivalry. And he LOVES other kids, especially babies. I suppose it really depends on how you feel and how your child is. My son didn't get diagnosed until he was 11, but we knew there was something different about him for years before that. he has anger management issues, and gets easily frustrated due to the fact that he has a speech impediment which makes him frustrated and act out when he can't get his point across. But very rarely does he act against his siblings (aside from when he was very little and like i said rivalry...taking his brother's toys etc) he also has a slew of younger cousins, one of which is extremely autistic and also has hearing problems, but he's absolutely wonderful with all of them.