Depression/bi polar

I feel myself slipping back into a depression. Things that I know shouldn't bother me are making me feel awful and I can't stop obsessing. I feel unworthy of love and alone. And it's so sudden, I was fine last Friday, started slipping this weekend. And I'm trying to stay conscious of it, keeping myself aware that life isn't really that bad, that its just the chemicals in my mind making me feel this way. I just don't want to feel this way again, I just want to be able to trust my feelings.

I'm bipolar...I feel sorry for myself at random, I start hating myself and the life I've given my daughter. I feel like a worthless piece of smurf. When I really really get down, I get suicidal, and absolutely NOTHING triggers it.

I feel like such a spoiled brat for getting down about the stupidest things, but it's part of my condition. You have to try to keep positive and work yourself through it, and accept any help you can get. No one is going to ever fully understand, so there will be times when you feel alienated.

At least that's how it is for me. =[ I'm sorry you're going through this. It gets better though! And you are DEFINITELY worthy of love, doll. I guarantee it. You made a gorgeous baby, that alone makes you worthwhile. You have a little one that needs you around for lots of kisses and snuggles. =]

Are you bi Polar? Are you off your meds? Do you know what has triggered this depression to start?

<blockquote><b>Quoting The Andromeda Strain:</b>" I'm bipolar...I feel sorry for myself at random, I start hating myself and the life I've given my daughter. ... [snip!] ... gorgeous baby, that alone makes you worthwhile. You have a little one that needs you around for lots of kisses and snuggles. =]"</blockquote>




That was really, really sweet. Thank you so much

<blockquote><b>Quoting applelove:</b>" Are you bi Polar? Are you off your meds? Do you know what has triggered this depression to start?"</blockquote>




I am diagnosed as bipolar. I'm off of meds because I'm breastfeeding and my psychiatrist is not comfortable giving me medication at all. I was going to try to wean DD but the process was so hard on her, and me, and basically seemed impossible... The anxiety I felt while weaning her and her just being hysterical made it seem insurmountable. So i gave up, and honestly for a while (maybe three weeks) it seemed I would be fine, that I could manage my feelings. But right now I'm having a hard time staying on top of it. Hopefully tonight is just the worst and tomorrow will be better.

Quoting Cheeks mom:" <blockquote><b>Quoting applelove:</b>" Are you bi Polar? Are you off your meds? Do ... [snip!] ... But right now I'm having a hard time staying on top of it. Hopefully tonight is just the worst and tomorrow will be better."

Well you know the medication keeps your brain chemicals altered for a while after you stop taking them. Often you can feel ok for a few weeks or months and then become unstable. I have some info that might help you I can message you with tonight. My LO is acting like a mad man so I can't do it now.
You will get past this!

<blockquote><b>Quoting applelove:</b>" Well you know the medication keeps your brain chemicals altered for a while after you stop taking them. ... [snip!] ... might help you I can message you with tonight. My LO is acting like a mad man so I can't do it now. You will get past this!"</blockquote>




I've been off my medication since October of 2011 when I found out I was pregnant, but I would love to learn as much as I can. Thank you!