Boyfriend wants a Vasectomy

So my boyfriend has told me he was going to get a vasectomy, well I always wanted one more child and I told him this and he seems just not interested in having more kids. I dont wanna force this onto him but it kinda breaks my heart a lil that he would just up and get one.... i told him a child wouldnt be right now but in the next couple of years. Am i in a loss in this situation?

It's his penis and testicles... If he wants a vasectomy and doesn't want more kids, then maybe you should respect that...

You can't force him to want another child anymore than he could force you to not want one.
Maybe he'll come around, maybe not. If you both don't want the same thing it's tough.

sorry you can't make him want another one.

Quoting LeTs*StArT*a*RiOt!:" It's his penis and testicles... If he wants a vasectomy and doesn't want more kids, then maybe you should respect that... "

That pretty much sums it up.  

It depends. Is not having another child a deal breaker for you? Would he be willing to have you go on a more permanent BC for a while and then talk it over in a few years?

It's something you need to discuss seriously with him. Come to a comprimise that works for both of you. He needs to respect your feelings as much as you have to respect his.

Quoting LeTs*StArT*a*RiOt!:" It's his penis and testicles... If he wants a vasectomy and doesn't want more kids, then maybe you should respect that... "

This, if you both have different view's on kids then it may be time to move you'r different ways...


I always just wanted 2 children and was even going to have my tubes tied when i had my daughter, HOWEVER my DH may want one in the future when we have our smurf together and who's to say i won't i may change my mind so i got paraguard. I also would need to be in better health to consider one more child. But we don't talk about it at this point as i need to get threw school and get us on our feet first.

You are totally entitled to your feelings of wanting another child.. That is something you guys will have to come to an agreement on. I do think it's wrong of him to make such a permanent decision without thinking about your feelings but it is his body, if you were the one who didn't want anymore kids and he did you would feel like it's your body your decision.

However, you guys are a couple you work together, make decisions together etc.. And that is something that should really be discussed I do not know how adamant you are on having another child but listen to his side and ask him why he doesn't want another.. He is your boyfriend I know you guys might be committed with a kid already and so forth but you aren't married and as painful as it may seem if you are set on having another child and that is something you REALLY want you should probably be with someone who has those sames goals in mind being on the same page with your SO is important at least to me it is.. Good luck and hopefully you guys can come to some sort of "truce" with this.

<blockquote><b>Quoting The Doctor:</b>" It depends. Is not having another child a deal breaker for you? Would he be willing to have you go on a more permanent BC for a while and then talk it over in a few years?"</blockquote>




This!

Quoting J u l i a .:" You are totally entitled to your feelings of wanting another child.. That is something you guys will ... [snip!] ... with your SO is important at least to me it is.. Good luck and hopefully you guys can come to some sort of "truce" with this. "

Why's it wrong of him? It's his body and he's not married to her, he has made no serious commitment to her, aka marriage or otherwise. It's his body, and she cannot and should not tell him what to do with it. If he doesn't want more kids and she does, maybe it's time to move on.

Quoting J u l i a .:" You are totally entitled to your feelings of wanting another child.. That is something you guys will ... [snip!] ... with your SO is important at least to me it is.. Good luck and hopefully you guys can come to some sort of "truce" with this. "

Well It doesnt make sense cause he is so up for a adoption of a child but doesnt want to have a child of his own? And no we have no kids together i have two from a prior relationship...

Quoting Mamma Boo!:" Well It doesnt make sense cause he is so up for a adoption of a child but doesnt want to have a child of his own? And no we have no kids together i have two from a prior relationship... "

Maybe he thinks that it's more kind to take in a child that's already alive and needs a good home than make another one.

But, either way... that's his feeling about it, he's entitled to it. What you have to decide is whether having another child is worth ending the relationship over if he doesn't want another.

Quoting LeTs*StArT*a*RiOt!:" Why's it wrong of him? It's his body and he's not married to her, he has made no serious commitment ... [snip!] ... she cannot and should not tell him what to do with it. If he doesn't want more kids and she does, maybe it's time to move on. "

Instead of picking out one point of what I said maybe you should read the part where I said that. Lol. The smurf?  

Quoting J u l i a .:" Instead of picking out one point of what I said maybe you should read the part where I said that. Lol. The smurf?  "

You said it was wrong of him to want to do this when she didn't. It's not. I read everything you said.

That's the part that you said that bugged me. It's not wrong to do what you want with your body.