Non Learning husband

Hey all.
I am having a little bit of an issue with my husband. This is my second birth, but his first so there is a little bit of a back story. My problem is he will not go to our birthing class or learn anything about the delivery room or even the baby now. I am 25 weeks pregnant at this time. I have tried not to be pushy and over the top about him learning. but i feel like his is failing... why doesnt he want to learn or be prepared for what is going to happen? I doesnt make sense to me. I have talked to him about it and he said "i will learn as i go through it" ..... !!!! Im thinking, yeah if you dont faint, then where will i be, doing it all alone, or having to tell him what to do instead of him being strong for me.... I am just frustrated. Does anyone have any insight on what i can do?

birthing classes are a joke.
your dh will be fine

Get a doula.


My SO never went to a class, but was an awesome support system for me during L&D.

I dont know, cause I feel the same as him.

I guess if SO really wanted me to go to some classes or whatever I would to make him happy. But I see nothing wrong with learning as we go....we never did any classes the first time, just went in and listened to the nurses  

We never did birthing classes or anything like that. I would read him articles about my pregnancy developement, but never anything about birthing. We did the learn as we go thing, and it worked out for us. Honestly I just dont see the point in the classes, but thats just me. To each their own I guess.

<blockquote><b>Quoting sballchic2:</b>" Hey all. I am having a little bit of an issue with my husband. This is my second birth, but his first ... [snip!] ... tell him what to do instead of him being strong for me.... I am just frustrated. Does anyone have any insight on what i can do?"</blockquote>




My husband or I ever did any of that. I basically raised my sister cause of our age difference and same with my nephew (he has a smurffy mom).
But my husband was never around babies at all. He was just a natural. As soon as he held our son everything just clicked. He learned how to change a diaper, feed him and bath him right from the nurses. I think those classes are more to put your mind at ease. I think you should just let him learn how he wants. Once the baby comes if he doesn't step it up then that's a different story but for now leave it alone.

Thank you all. I am not expecting him to be overly into it or anything. Its only a one day class... thats it

I never went to any birthing classes.

I wouldn't push him to go, I really don't think he'd get much out of it anyway. *shrug*

I sorta agree with your husband. We did not go to any an my husbands attitude was the same. It is sorta a waste if time

Quoting Angela Nichols:" birthing classes are a joke. your dh will be fine"

this.

My fiance and I never went to Birthing classes. I was in labor for 12 hours and we both did fine. Things really do come to you when you are going through them.

I didn't do the class's they are a waste of time. Just do the learn as you go! Men have no interest in learning about this stuff like we do. It isn't in their genes to be all prepared for the babies like we have that motherly instinct.

You will be fine don't put the pressure on him to learn something he doesn't want to learn.

We never went to any classes. DH felt like they were a complete money grab. He kept saying people have been doing it for thousands of years without having to go to a class or reading about it so you will be fine. It did bug me a little when he said that but I did see his point. He did read a little about what was going on in my pregnancy from baby gaga updates and such. He knew exactly what I needed when I was in labor and was really awesome. If he continues to not care once baby is here then its a problem but I think you guys will be just fine

Quoting Angela Nichols:" birthing classes are a joke. your dh will be fine"

 

my husband never read up or went to classes either. neither did i for that matter. there's really not a whole lot they do during labor/delivery anyway.. and as far as after baby is born, guys learn on the spot. he'll pick it up.

Just tell him what YOU want, like if you want him there feeding you ice chips, or massaging you, or holding your leg. Let him know ahead of time so you both know his role in this, and dont stress.