Quoting Melissa Mackenzies mommy:" We both work full time jobs. Our daughter goes to a sitter 2 days a week. He drops her off and I pick ... [snip!] ... up he gets VErY defensive saying he helps out. But he dosnt and it dosnt change anything besides makes us angry at each other"
Punch him in the throat? No, I'm kidding. But have you tried talking to him? You'd be surprised at how far a conversation can go. If I'm getting frustrated, I'll tell my husband then ask him to do the simple things (help with the older girls, do the dishes, etc)