Toddler Nursing Help Please

Please I could really use some help if you have experience with nursing an older baby. We still nurse down for bed and naps and that is when the problems arises. Not when he just wants a quick sip of milk.

When nursing for comfort or sleep then it becomes a whole relaxing experience for my LO. He needs the whole experience to be just right or its not "right" and then he will flip out and cry and not go to sleep. He needs to have his legs in the right spot and be held just right and he hums to help himself relax...I don't know if this is normal or not. anyway

Well at one point ( about 6-8 months) he added touching me as part of his relaxation. He started to use his outside arm to rub my face. This is a very specific rub. He uses the back of his hand to rub in a half circle then turn the hand and uses the palm side to rub in the rest of the circle. If that makes any since at all. But what I am getting at is that he has a very specific massages he gives me in order for him to get his "relaxation" or what ever he need out of his nursing session.

So as he got older he moved his hand down and started to do this to my neck(10 months) and then my declate( 12 months). I never stopped him because it seams to help him and its not bothersome.

OK now this is my Question and problem. About 2 weeks ago, overnight he started sticking his hand down my shirt and rubbing my breast like this. And sometimes even grabbing my nipple and rubbing it between his fingers. This makes me uncomfortable and I don't like it. I have tried a few things to get him to stop but he just keeps doing it, or having a tantrum because he can't "relax" with out his method.

Do you have any advise on how I can get him to stop?

Things I have tried are
*Moving his had
*Putting my arm over my other breast
* wearing high neck shirts.

Nothing is helping very well... I would love any advise at all. Thank you so much

ok first of all, all of this is totally normal.
my daughter did the same she actually went straight for my nipples - there is a term for it "twiddling" lol.

there were times it didn't bother me so i just let her at it. but yea sometimes it made my damn skin crawl.

anyway, if you are uncomfortable then don't let him do it AT ALL. believe me if you don't let him nurse (unlatch him) whenever he tries touching your nips then he will get the hint.
that's all you can really do i think.

and by the way the high neck shirt. lmao. everyone suggests that.

i tried that to. they get in there if they want to no matter what the hell you are wearing.  

My daughter does that.

It's really annoying! My face, my arm, my boobs. Etc. I totally understand.

What I do is i take whichever hand she's bothering me with and hold it and tap it against my chest rhythmically (weird I know) like a drum and she falls asleep.

But most times she gets pissed and keeps massaging.

Quoting Dr. Angelface:" ok first of all, all of this is totally normal. my daughter did the same she actually went straight for ... [snip!] ... him nurse (unlatch him) whenever he tries touching your nips then he will get the hint. that's all you can really do i think."

Oh good call with the unlatching, He is 14 months and he is getting that I don't like the nipple thing. I am not as bothered if its just my breast. And sometimes if I stop him he will grab my nipple hard and pull it just to "show" me

Quoting bulbasaur!:" My daughter does that. It's really annoying! My face, my arm, my boobs. Etc. I totally understand. ... [snip!] ... my chest rhythmically (weird I know) like a drum and she falls asleep. But most times she gets pissed and keeps massaging."

I have tried things like that and he just gets mad and will pull his arm back from me and keep massaging me or flip out and get worked up.

I don't allow the here at all. And he knows it. When he wants milk he'll pat his chest and will point to me. Or else go into the pantry and get me a box of soy milk if he wants that. He has hand signals that tell us what he wants when he wants it.

Occasionally, he'll look down my shirt and smile, but that's usually a cue too.

I don't allow him to touch my face or pick my teeth or stuff he likes to do, if he does, I promptly remove him, and then he gets upset but he'll get back on and "mean" business and won't pick at me until he's done. Sometimes he'll pick at my boob, the nipple and I just take it away and he's over it. He's also a very big nighttime nurser, comfort nurser.

I started him early teaching him this so now he knows.

I don't know what to tell you, you've done everything I would of done, I'd be at my wits end too.

Quoting TheCoopersKnitWitch:" I don't allow the here at all. And he knows it. When he wants milk he'll pat his chest and will point ... [snip!] ... him this so now he knows. I don't know what to tell you, you've done everything I would of done, I'd be at my wits end too."

Well I think it is my fault for not stopping this sooner. I should have made him stop when it was my face or chest. But he is my first and I had no idea that his cute little habit would turn into him molesting me and him not able to relax with out it.

I have made some mistakes because he is my first that I will not make with the next kid. Like I called nursing "boob" when he was a baby. I would say things to my SO like I am giving the baby my boob so can you get me a drink or the baby is crying I think he needs a boob.

Well now I know that using the word boob was a HUGE mistake. Because now when he wants milk he says "boob?" I am now correcting him and saying "milk" But it is all my fault.... I should never have said boob.

For the next kid I will never say anything I don't want him to say. Because now I have a 14 month old yelling BOOB! and grabbing them.

Quoting applelove:" Well I think it is my fault for not stopping this sooner. I should have made him stop when it was my ... [snip!] ... next kid I will never say anything I don't want him to say. Because now I have a 14 month old yelling BOOB! and grabbing them."

But that's ok too. I think my first was the worst, he was also the worst because he self weaned and then decided a week later he still wanted it!

You always learn the most with your first. And maybe I'm older(I don't know), I just don't tolerate as much as I used to. Especially when it comes to picking at me, I mean it is annoying when your sitting there watching him eat and he starts picking at your teeth you know?

We started really enforcing "rules" at like 6 months, that's when he started picking at me the most. And now he's like got really good nursing "manners" as I heard someone call it once. Even with my husband, when my husband gets him up in the middle of the night he'll pat his chest, and point and tell my husband "mom!" LOL, he's so cute though.

I think you guys can definitely overcome it and just take it as lesson learned. For your next one try something different! And see if you can work him off feeling you up.

Quoting TheCoopersKnitWitch:" But that's ok too. I think my first was the worst, he was also the worst because he self weaned and ... [snip!] ... and just take it as lesson learned. For your next one try something different! And see if you can work him off feeling you up."

We still co sleep and I have been worried that he will never wean, two years was kinda my goal but not set in stone. He dose not seam to be slowing down on his own at all! I am not really sure what we will do but for now we are both OK with nursing. I am a SAHM and he is a SAHLO   so it works. I have been worried that he will be on the boob for 8 years LOL

Then all of a sudden this past few days he is having "Daddy" days.
Do your kids do this. Have a few days in a row they only want Daddy. This past few days my LO screams DAAADDDDYYYY(imaging a crying baby crying the word Daddy with tears streaming down his face) Then when Daddy shows up the screaming baby turns into a happy laughing baby. So those are "daddy" Days and LO even sleeps with "Daddy" on these days. LO gets on Daddys pillow and snuggles and pushes me away and will not even take food from me at dinner time! Only his Daddy can feed him. LO will hold his lips together and turn his head away from me if I offer him somthing. Then go to his dad and just open his mouth expecting a bite.


So maybe he will wean one of these days

Quoting applelove:" We still co sleep and I have been worried that he will never wean, two years was kinda my goal but not ... [snip!] ... I offer him somthing. Then go to his dad and just open his mouth expecting a bite. So maybe he will wean one of these days "

My most recent baby is so lax, that he doesn't even care.. Daddy, mommy, all the same to him. He's so chill all the time.

But my daughter is a complete daddy manipulator. She has been since the day she was born. Which is hard to imagine but she always has been. She would nurse from me, and go snuggle with daddy. And now, if she wakes up and he's gone, she has to FaceTime him to give him a virtual hug and kiss to make sure he knows she loves him and that he left her.

And she's always been this way. When she was potty training at a year and half, "Daddy take me." Only daddy can feed, only daddy could put her in the high chair. Horrible. She's recently been having mommy days, but it's not that often.

Quoting applelove:" Well I think it is my fault for not stopping this sooner. I should have made him stop when it was my ... [snip!] ... next kid I will never say anything I don't want him to say. Because now I have a 14 month old yelling BOOB! and grabbing them."

hahahaha i did the same thing. my daughter would scream BOOOOBIE!!!! when she was two. so embarissing

Quoting applelove:" We still co sleep and I have been worried that he will never wean, two years was kinda my goal but not ... [snip!] ... I offer him somthing. Then go to his dad and just open his mouth expecting a bite. So maybe he will wean one of these days "

i co-sleep also. i had planned to breastfeed for 2 years also, hoping she'd taper off after that. DID NOT happen. i had to drop her nap after 2yr in order to drop day time feedings. then she nursed to sleep and ALL NIGHT LONG until i finally kicked her off my boob at 3 yrs 3months. LOL
some kids are just boob addicts!

Quoting Dr. Angelface:" i co-sleep also. i had planned to breastfeed for 2 years also, hoping she'd taper off after that. DID ... [snip!] ... to sleep and ALL NIGHT LONG until i finally kicked her off my boob at 3 yrs 3months. LOL some kids are just boob addicts! "

Yeah sounds like mine. If I (GOD FORBID) go out with out the baby he will not even think about the boob,except for, breakfast nap, bedtime or a bump.
I am a SAHM though and so I spend most my time with him and a lot of the time when we are playing so when on the floor he will crawl over(suddenly revert to crawling even though he started walking well at 9 months!)and get himself into the nursing position. He pulls down my shirt, sits in my lap and pulls his legs up so I "have" to cradle him or else his legs would just be in a strange position.
And if I am watching TV and he is playing alone then he will climb up on me and do the same thing.

I would say on days that we are playing together all day that he (14 months) nurses about 30 times a day! Sometimes he is use using me as a pacifier and not doing much drinking.

Any yes he gets a lot of solids and water and juice... but that does not stop him from saying BOOB in his sleep or any other time! BOOB BABY!