Thanks for the input. I have taken all your helpful advice to heart. Thought long and hard and made my decision!

I think having "no condoms" is a poor excuse to have unprotected sex. Unless you're TRYING to get pregnant.

Good luck. I hope everything works out for you.

Good lawd  

I think you should hope you aren't pregnant then pump the breaks. You say that you don't just keep going back for no reason, but maybe you should look at it like- why haven't we stayed together, maybe this isn't right at all, and just comfortable because its familiar.

Quoting pilot Jess:" Good lawd   I think you should hope you aren't pregnant then pump the breaks. You say that you ... [snip!] ... look at it like- why haven't we stayed together, maybe this isn't right at all, and just comfortable because its familiar."

I agree with this...

No offense, but you still sound immature in your thinking. You have a new baby with another man, and you're more concerned about getting pregnant by someone else than the well being of the child you have now.

I'd be focusing on my living dd and not having unprotected sex with my on again off again boyfriend. Let her be the baby for the time being. It's not her fault he's not her dad. Just my opinion but I think this is a very bad idea.

Quoting I'm His Amy He's My Rory:" No offense, but you still sound immature in your thinking. You have a new baby with another man, and ... [snip!] ... another man, and you're more concerned about getting pregnant by someone else than the well being of the child you have now. "

Umm excuse me? I am concerned about her well being but lots of people have kids close in age. I love my little girl more than anything and I was going to wait at least until she was in pre-school to have number 2. I've thought about this a lot and I could very well handle to kids close in age if I wanted to even if I ended up being a single parent again I would make it work. I wouldn't be trying to ttc with just anyone but I know what caused our previous break ups. When we were on and off in high school it was because we were in high school and didn't know what we wanted. When we broke up after our miscarriage it was because I was depressed and I wasn't even able to love myself at the time let alone love him or let him love me. I was in a dark place and nothing he could say or do could fix it. I went to grief counseling and a support group and eventually got out of my state of depression. Things are much better now. The reason we stayed apart for so long after that was because I hurt him really bad and even now he is afraid I might hurt him again when times get hard but I won't because i've learned that tough times should make a couple grow together and become stronger not tear them apart.

What I am worried about my list of cons
-Leilani won't get as much one on one time...the pro to that is if she did have a sibling close in age they may have a very close bond and love growing up together.

-If things don't work out I could be a single mother of 2 and being a single mother to 1 is already challenging

-getting pregnant again so soon could cause baby#2 to be born prematurely

-I'm trying to finish my bachelor's degree and doing that with 2 kids would be a handful

Quoting Miracle_Mommy 2012:" Umm excuse me? I am concerned about her well being but lots of people have kids close in age. I love ... [snip!] ... but I won't because i've learned that tough times should make a couple grow together and become stronger not tear them apart."

Congratulations? I mean seriously. Even being married it's not easy to be expecting a second. We had NO plans of having this baby now. And no, you're not putting her best interests first. No matter what you'd like to believe. It's very unsafe and dangerous for you to get pregnant again so soon. Not to mention going through a pregnancy with such a young child will be taking time and energy you need for her away. If you were so happy with things, you wouldn't have even chanced getting pregnant again. And realistically, you have a newborn, that sleeps a lot right now, you don't know yet how hard an infant can be yet. You may get lucky and have an easy child, but what if you don't? What if you get horrible morning sickness next time? What if you're keeled over a toilet bowl and your 3-4 month old is screaming to be fed or changed? You can't simply tell her "Mommy's sick you need to wait."

Quoting I'm His Amy He's My Rory:" Congratulations? I mean seriously. Even being married it's not easy to be expecting a second. We had ... [snip!] ... bowl and your 3-4 month old is screaming to be fed or changed? You can't simply tell her "Mommy's sick you need to wait.""

I had severe morning sickness my entire 9 months of pregnancy. My baby has colic and is on an apnea monitor, she certainly does not sleep all the time. I do know how hard a baby can be, she is a difficult baby sometimes but I never for a second regret having her. I am not actively hard core ttc. If it happens, it happens. I am not going to go out and buy ovulation sticks or have sex every other day. Also my parents are very supportive and always there if I need back up they only live 15 minutes away and my mom is currently unemployed and available for emergency grandma duty.

Quoting Miracle_Mommy 2012:" I had severe morning sickness my entire 9 months of pregnancy. My baby has colic and is on an apnea monitor, ... [snip!] ... if I need back up they only live 15 minutes away and my mom is currently unemployed and available for emergency grandma duty."

Okay, so, let me get this right. You have a high needs baby. You have a track record of being very sick while pregnant. Yet you're not going to prevent a pregnancy, because mommy and daddy will step in and rescue you. Yup. Spectacularly mature.

<blockquote><b>Quoting I'm His Amy He's My Rory:</b>" Okay, so, let me get this right. You have a high needs baby. You have a track record of being very sick ... [snip!] ... Yet you're not going to prevent a pregnancy, because mommy and daddy will step in and rescue you. Yup. Spectacularly mature."</blockquote>

I wish I had that same comfort lol I cook, clean & take care of my baby with only a small bit of help after SO gets off work. If we got pregnant again i'd panic because I don't have help, my kid is up around 15 hours of the day & I couldn't handle being pregnant again. I was dog sick & in a lot of pain throughout my entire pregnancy

Quoting ~The Lunar Flower~:" <blockquote><b>Quoting I'm His Amy He's My Rory:</b>" Okay, so, let me get this right. ... [snip!] ... 15 hours of the day & I couldn't handle being pregnant again. I was dog sick & in a lot of pain throughout my entire pregnancy"

My mom is just 2 miles away but even when I was dog sick I think she only came over to help once. And still that was a case of "You know you'd never manage without me." Uh yeah, I can, and do, every day.

<blockquote><b>Quoting I'm His Amy He's My Rory:</b>" My mom is just 2 miles away but even when I was dog sick I think she only came over to help once. And ... [snip!] ... over to help once. And still that was a case of "You know you'd never manage without me." Uh yeah, I can, and do, every day."</blockquote>

I'd blow a few gaskets if my mother said anything like that. My sister still tells me to this day that if I hadn't lived with her & helped her take care of her son for the 1st year that she wouldn't have been able to do it.

I'm also a little biased on the situation here as well. Only because a good friend of mine lose her baby at 29 weeks last may, got pregnant again within her 6 weeks & lost that baby at 27 weeks this time