I hate this...

Ok so I feel awful. I am a teacher, an unemployed teacher right now, but that's not the point. I am looking for another job so that I can go back to work in the fall so we are going to have to put my little guy in day care. We found a center that we like (I liked it a lot when we went there to tour when I first got pregnant, now I'm not such a fan) DH likes it more than I do. To be honest, I hate it. Not because there is anything really "wrong" with it, but because I can't stand the thought of leaving my son there all day. I can barely let my mom hold him for very long and no one other than my husband and nurses at the hospital has ever taken him out of my sight. I am so scared to leave him in someone else's care and also that he will bond with them more than with me because he will be with them all day and not with me. I won't be taking him to day care until August, but already I want to cry over it. When we took the paperwork back and the deposit check to hold our spot for August I couldn't even go in to drop it off. I made my husband take it in and I stayed in the car with our son.

Am I being silly, does anyone else feel this way and what can I do to make this easier to deal with?

I don't blame you at all. But, I do have a positive for you...
I am also a teacher and to tell you the truth, we have the best professions you can have if you are a mom. Just think about all of the days you will have off to be with your son while your other friends have to work all year long. (he he he)

Enjoy your summer and try not to loo at it as a negative. Soon enough you will have a day off to spend with him! Good luck job hunting!!!

Quoting KelRel:“ Ok so I feel awful. I am a teacher, an unemployed teacher right now, but that's not the point. I am looking ... [snip!] ... in the car with our son. Am I being silly, does anyone else feel this way and what can I do to make this easier to deal with?”

Aw, well I do not really have any advice for you since I am going to be going through the same thing kinda. Not the day care but my mom will be watching Aly when/if I find a job. I am an unemployed teacher, too! The education field here sucks - there are NO jobs! Anyways, I have been off since April and I am going to be a mess when I have to go back to work in August. Just the thought of not being with her makes me want to cry!

Quoting matt, nat and baby #1:“ I don't blame you at all. But, I do have a positive for you... I am also a teacher and to tell you the ... [snip!] ... summer and try not to loo at it as a negative. Soon enough you will have a day off to spend with him! Good luck job hunting!!!”

Hey! Happy summer vacation 

i go back to work in 2 weeks and i feel the same way. i dont want mybaby to bond with anyone but ME. im the mother and i dont want her to forget that. i know what you mean and how you feel because im going through the same thing but people are telling me it gets much easier with time so i hope it does.

I know exactly how you feel, I leave my son with my MIL , she takes him out for walks so I can recoup once in a while, but I can't even think straight when he is out of my sight...ugh...my hubby says that I will spoil him so much, no woman will be good enough for him LOL..oh, well..

I"m loving the summer off, but I've been home since the end of April and I've had him with me 24/7 since the day he was born. I haven't even left the house without him. I know I need to get out and let other people watch him some, but that is my problem. We moved here about a year ago and we have no family near by. The only friend I have up here that I would trust to watch him just had her own son about a week ago so she isn't in any shape to watch him and her own child.

Another thing that is making this so hard and is making me not want to let anyone watch him is from my own childhood experiences. My parents had my next door neighbor babysit me. Its what she did, she babysat about 6 or 7 kids in her home along with her own child. Our families got along great etc... As most kids are raised to do, I was raised to always listen to adults and do what they tell you etc.. Well this woman was nuts. She spanked us to the point of leaving marks...that happened only once to me because my parents saw her hand print in my butt and they told her to never do it again and STILL left me with her (I have issues with that, but anyways..), she would give us "tea" from a can to help us sleep, but told us that tea was a big persons drink and that it was a treat for us and not to tell our parents- turns out that tea can also be spelled budweiser, she let her daughter get away with anything, including beating up the other kids. I was repeatedly shoved downstairs and had baby carriages pushed down behind me, etc... She would also leave us in a locked car while she went grocery shopping and a couple of times left us home alone so that she could go spend time with a neighbor up the street.

All this time my parents had no clue and I spent years under this woman's care and I didn't say anything to my parents about it because I was "listening to an adult". Because of all of this I am SO untrusting of people when it comes to my child. It just makes this so much harder. They need to find ways for you to telecommute as a teacher. :-)

What level do you have a degree in?

Quoting Mommy2Aly:“ What level do you have a degree in?”

Elementary Ed.

Quoting KelRel:“ Elementary Ed.”

I do too! Here Elem. Ed. is pre-k to 3rd....what is it there?

Quoting KelRel:“ Ok so I feel awful. I am a teacher, an unemployed teacher right now, but that's not the point. I am looking ... [snip!] ... in the car with our son. Am I being silly, does anyone else feel this way and what can I do to make this easier to deal with?”

You are totally normal feeling this way.  

Let me give you some info, though:
It has been scientifically proven that unless there is something wrong with a child's attachment to their parents (i.e. abuse or neglect causing poor attachment from birth) they cannot and will not attach more to a daycare provider, grandparent, or baby sitter.
these sites are some helpful things to look at and ease your mind (hopefully)
This one is a parent's guide to choosing childcare (to make sure the place is THE best because you can ALWAYS switch centers)
http://nrc.uchsc.edu/RESOURCES/ParentsGuide.pdf
and
(this is some stuff to help find quality care as well:
http://aspe.hhs.gov/hsp/ccquality-ind02/

Quoting KelRel:“ I"m loving the summer off, but I've been home since the end of April and I've had him with me 24/7 since ... [snip!] ... when it comes to my child. It just makes this so much harder. They need to find ways for you to telecommute as a teacher. :-)”

I am so sorry that happened to you.  Centers, though are very well monitored and while stuff does happen, and I'm not saying you shouldn't worry at all.  It is different than in home stuff.  

Here is a link I was looking for and had to have my MIL find for me.  It will list any centers that have had violations 

https://secure.in.gov/apps/fssa/carefinder/index.html

Quoting Megan♥ baby Lydia:“ Here is a link I was looking for and had to have my MIL find for me. It will list any centers that have had violations https://secure.in.gov/apps/fssa/carefinder/index.html”

THANK YOU! That does make me feel a little better.

Quoting KelRel:“ THANK YOU! That does make me feel a little better.”

you're welcome.  my family owns a center that i worked at for 4 years.  so, i have been on both sides.  i don't know that i would be able to leave my baby at another center.  luckily i don't have to.  but i also know that they are very closely monitored and i would never do in-home