Is it right to do this?

Hi I was wondering if its right for me to help my boyfriend with the expenses of us two moving in together to an apartment. I feel like I shouldn't give money, but if I wanna live in a better place and decorate it, I would have to put in some money. And one other thing is that I want to keep giving money to my mom, since he has debts and it wouldn't be fair to her, that I leave the home and not help her, when she took care of me this long. I'm 24 years old. Thanks

Let me get this right: you're asking if you should contribute money to a place you will be living in?

Yes. You should.

Uhm well you shouldn't be expected to pay ALL of the bills, but yeah if you want to decorate it your way without his input then you should be the one to shell out the cash. But def don't leave your mom high and dry. Talk to the boyfriend about maybe helping out a little bit, and then you could pay him back?

Quoting The Doctor:" Let me get this right: you're asking if you should contribute money to a place you will be living in? Yes. You should."

  

You should be paying something unless he makes enough for you everything and agrees with you paying nothing

<blockquote><b>Quoting Suzanne88:</b>" Hi I was wondering if its right for me to help my boyfriend with the expenses of us two moving in together ... [snip!] ... wouldn't be fair to her, that I leave the home and not help her, when she took care of me this long. I'm 24 years old. Thanks"</blockquote>




#1. If you are living with your BF, yes you contribute to the household expenses.

#2. Your mom is a big girl and can pay her own bills.

Your are a grown woman and should be standing on your own two feet paying your share. Again, you need to be paying part of the rent and such. You don't need to pay his debts but you should be contributing to the household expenses.

Why wouldn't you contribute money to where you would be living?

You shouldn't be obligated to pay your moms debt. As a parent its her job to take care of you. I wouldn't expect my daughter to give me money once she's moved out....

Quoting The Doctor:" Let me get this right: you're asking if you should contribute money to a place you will be living in? Yes. You should."

 

Idk why this would even be a question. Of COURSE you should.

Thank u all for ur comments, it really helped me a lot see it clearly  

<blockquote><b>Quoting [♥]Mrs. Morgan:</b>" Why wouldn't you contribute money to where you would be living? You shouldn't be obligated to pay your ... [snip!] ... moms debt. As a parent its her job to take care of you. I wouldn't expect my daughter to give me money once she's moved out...."</blockquote>




 

Please don't be offended by this, but I think it's crazy that you don't feel comfortable giving/lending money to someone you're about to live with.
You shouldn't have to pay everything all the time, but yeah, you should pay what you can, even if your bf needs to borrow a little bit.
And I also agree with the other poster's who have said that you should not be paying your mother's bills if you don't live with her. To be blunt, you don't owe her anything for taking care of you. She chose that. It's her job as a mother. She should be supportive of you being independent and responsible, and should not hinder you by expecting you to pay for her.

Quoting VeggieBurglar:" Please don't be offended by this, but I think it's crazy that you don't feel comfortable giving/lending ... [snip!] ... She should be supportive of you being independent and responsible, and should not hinder you by expecting you to pay for her."

You know your right!! I have the same thing going on with my mom were she makes me feel obligated to help her constantly. But she chose to have me. She should be helping me because I constantly struggle. It's her job. You really opened my eyes. I will never make my child feel obligated to help me out financially.

Quoting Not tellin:" <blockquote><b>Quoting Suzanne88:</b>" Hi I was wondering if its right for me to help ... [snip!] ... be paying part of the rent and such. You don't need to pay his debts but you should be contributing to the household expenses."

Thank you for saying exactly what I wanted to say lol

If your living out on your own together as a couple then you both should pitch in and work together, as for your mom, she should be paying her bills not you. My mom helps me out all the time and ya I feel like I owe her something, but she would never expect me to pay her bills or even help pay her bills I even live with her, she may ask every once in a while if we could help with a bill, but she knows we have our own bills that need to be paid first and I help her by cleaning and cooking. She's your mother and needs to be taking care of you, not the other way around.