Why do people care....

That my SO and I arent married... Or that we have the kids we have. I dont get it. Im not living on welfare, we support our kids and thats that.. Sure i live in an apartment at the moment but it was either find a place to live and move in that day or keep stqying with my grandma and grandpa AND my aunt and uncle who ended up needing to stay in the small 1 bd room cabin we ALLL were living in..


So i called. Aplace and moved in that day. Its not a SmurffY ASS apartment but they arent luxery apartments either..

Then i get message from a friend saying, chris IS getting a vasectomy right? I told her no, he is getting the clamps incase we want it reversed, vasectomies come with risks we both arent willing to fully take. We will be very very carreful obviously to no get pregnant again.. But im just annoyed.. I post anything on FB about this pregnancy this friend always has her 2 cents to add. I cnt help you waited till you were lik 30 something to have kids and you dont want any more at all.. Good for you. Im not you. I know she always bitching about peole popping out kids who live off the government but i dont! i am pretty sure she thinks i am on welfare or something because of the things shesays to me.. And even if i WAS it still wouldnt be her business,, we all pay the same smurfing taxes regardless.. Im just annoyed and contemplating on telling her to back the smurf up.. I just dont want awkward play dates,, okay end vent,.

I would tell her to shove it up her big fat ass and delete her.

I'm going to say because 10-20 years ago you were married wrote you had kids and it wasn't acceptable to not be. Now people see nothing wrong with a 16 year old who is pregnant because its the norm now.

Anytime you post anything on a public forum you are inviting other peoples opinions on that matter.

I don't understand why people care about a lot of things, like how you feed your child, whether you circ or not, what kind of "parent" you are... But people do. People seem to think everything is up for debate when it's not.

If you don't want her to say anything, either delete her, or block her from seeing things you post about your pregnancy.

I'd tell her it's none of her damn business.
I seriously don't understand why people feel like it's their place to police everyone else with their unwarranted, crappy comments.

I think alot of women who seem judgmental are actually jealous. Maybe her marriage isn't happy, maybe she isn't enjoying motherhood, maybe she wishes she would have had kids sooner. I'd kill her with kindness, but that's just how I am with people like that.

Quoting Vile Tramp:" Anytime you post anything on a public forum you are inviting other peoples opinions on that matter. ... [snip!] ... If you don't want her to say anything, either delete her, or block her from seeing things you post about your pregnancy. "

  

Hun I know where u r coming from we r not married and we have 3 kids, we r not on welfare and have a house and my kids do not want for anything. But people still ask when we r getting married and if after our last child if we were getting *fixed*. Like really it's none of anyones damn business. I get so mad and his mom keeps saying "no more kids right" smurf off lady.

Honey, people are going to judge you no matter what, they will always have something to say. Until the world can learn to just live and let live, I'm afriad we will all have to just deal with it. Try not to pay too much attention to the things they say, it may make your life a little easier.

She doesn't seem like a very good friend...she obviously looks down on you. A lot of people look down on young girls with multiple kids, that's just how it is. Don't let it get to you. And whether or not you guys are getting married or SO is getting clamped or not is none of her business.

Quoting I'm Marbles:" I'm going to say because 10-20 years ago you were married wrote you had kids and it wasn't acceptable ... [snip!] ... and it wasn't acceptable to not be. Now people see nothing wrong with a 16 year old who is pregnant because its the norm now."

I don't think people see nothing wrong with teen pregnancy. It's something many people are actively trying to prevent. Teen pregnancy isn't a NEW thing. It's just more talked about. Back in the day when a teen got pregnant they had a shotgun wedding to cover it up. And in the 40s/50s it was extremely common for teens to get married and have kids very young. Because women weren't expected to do much other than raise the babies. Society is shifting, so it's more taboo for a teen to have a baby because she is expected to turn into a contributing member of society, something that is made much harder when you have a child at a young age.

<blockquote><b>Quoting Vile Tramp:</b>" Anytime you post anything on a public forum you are inviting other peoples opinions on that matter. ... [snip!] ... If you don't want her to say anything, either delete her, or block her from seeing things you post about your pregnancy. "</blockquote>




I dont post anything about myfinancial situation or things like. I have said my SO is getting snipped and stuff, but all i do is talk about the pregnancy and she brings up marriage and vasectamy and stuff.. Just annoying..


I totally understand that its the internet, but i thought she was a friend. I do just feel like she is looking donw me. You should hear her talk about the young airforce wives and moms its very judgemental..

We all pay the same taxes, but as a legal single mom you do get some breaks that married couples don't. Everyone is going to have their ideal way of life, and marriage is a tradition, so things like that are hard for others to understand when people don't share the same views.

First of all, I'm sorry your 'friend' is acting like that. That's crappy!  

Second of all, like you said, it's no ones business if you have 1 kid or 20! It's obvious that you take care of them and they are loved. I hate stupid judgmental people like that. I Know it's Te Internet, but can people not have manners regardless of where you're talking to them?!

Unfortunately, I have similar problems. One reason I waited to tell anyone. People think because you have multiple kids, you HAVE to live off welfare. Especially since we have 4, 1 on Te way and I stay home and dh is the only one working. We don't. We work hard for everything we have. He works full time, graduates college in may a d in the national guard. We just bought a house and our kids have everything they need and most things they want. it's so frustrating that people wan to assume the worst. And I have gotten a few 'are you done now?' 'you're getting fixed right?' comments and it sucks. :/. Just because they can't handle their one or 2 kids, doeant mean I can't handle my 4 (soon to be 5). Sorry, this is one of my peeves.  


ETA: We have been together for 7 years and just recently got married. As long as you have a good relationship, who cares?!

Quoting ☮ Phuket:" <blockquote><b>Quoting Vile Tramp:</b>" Anytime you post anything on a public forum ... [snip!] ... just feel like she is looking donw me. You should hear her talk about the young airforce wives and moms its very judgemental.."

Well if that's what she believes, then you shouldn't really be surprised, friend or not.

My OWN sister, thinks me having two kids is a "hoard" of children. Lol. She says ALL THE TIME, " Oh you aren't going to have another are you!?". That's just how SHE believes, that's why WE don't talk about it.

You have a choice in this though, you can delete her off your friends, or block her from all your status's that contain information regarding your pregnancy. If you don't do it, then by default, you are welcoming her comments, and enabling her to comment on them as she sees fit.