AWKWARD sexual moments?

Please share yours.

So, dude and i have had 2 moments where we've had no kids for a few hours in the last...forever. It's just..beyond rare.
Today was one of them. The kids went to their grandparents to go swimming and on a bike ride.
So we found ourselves with about an hour once he got home for work.
Of course that meant sex.

Now, i LOVE sex. i mean the type who would have it all day/every day.
And i'm not subtle about that with dude either ha.
But for some reason today, i just..couldn't get in to it as much.
(first time ever)
Especially with no kids in the house..i was suspiciously...
not loud as hell.

And dude noticed. Right after, and i mean RIGHT after (like, no bodies had exited other bodies) He said, "did you even like that? was that even good for you?"

not in an angry/annoyed way..but in like an odd/desperate way...
ummmm  
i know it's no like..farting during sex awkwardness or saying someone else's name, ha.
but..i mean, at least get outta me before asking me such an awkward question!

okay, your turn.

One time SO had just finished, was still inside me and said "sup smurf?"


I don't even know....

Lol?

I think a lot of my pregnant sex with DH was awkward, period. No specific stories, there was just this huge belly in the way with out child hanging out in it.

Quoting Cheeks mom:" One time SO had just finished, was still inside me and said "sup smurf?" I don't even know.... Lol?"

hahaha whaaat!?  

Quoting melindapple:" I think a lot of my pregnant sex with DH was awkward, period. No specific stories, there was just this huge belly in the way with out child hanging out in it."

hahah true  

Well........

Dh and I were going at it...I raised up and he went down and we bashed each others head so hard I got dizzy. After we laughed for 30 minutes, the mood was killed.

Or one time..we were doing it doggy style kind of, except I was flat on the bed...He took my legs and tried to make me do the worm. I laughed.....I had to put a pillow over my face, I was laughing so hard.

Or....when he was drunk and it slipped in the wrong hole and I almost cried because it hurt so bad.  

We've also both farted during sex, but.....We just keep going.

DH and I have had a lot of moments where things happen and we just can't help but laugh horribly.

I've shared this on bg before. I pooped, diarrhea, on my hubs on accident whilst fornicating. it was so funny. when it happened the only thing I said was "I pooped on you" and nearly died laughing as I ran, butt hole clenched, to the bathroom

having sex right after high school graduation with my then boyfriend. at my parents' house, in my room. my tv is on and we're not paying attention. all of a sudden, we both realize at the same time that the discovery channel is on and two antelope or something are gettin it on. we look and laugh at the same time... i know we both thought the same thing too.

"you and me baby ain't nothin' but mammals, so let's do it like they do on the discovery channel."

THEN... the most horrible sex ever occured, i faked my first orgasm, then lied about how good it was. lmao.

One time I was giving DH head and he thrusted at the wrong moment when I was doing my thing and I barfed all over his penis and stomach. We had first started dating... That was horrible.



Second awkward thing... We were very into having sex, both of us were being loud as hell (back when we were in high school) when my mom and sister came home but we didn't know. And they didn't make any loud noises or anything. We walked out naked and they were both sitting there looking like what. The. Hell. And then he turned around put his clothes on and about died from embarrassment as he left. AWKWARD!

Quoting Cheeks mom:" One time SO had just finished, was still inside me and said "sup smurf?" I don't even know.... Lol?"

 

Well idk if this is awkward but deff funny/embarrassing.

One time I was having sex with this dude & we were both pretty drunk (those crazy times before I had a child), well I went to get on top & I fell off the smurfing bed!! OMFG, I felt like dying but then I felt like it could of been a scene from 40 year old virgin lmao.

<blockquote><b>Quoting KNZ.:</b>" hahaha whaaat!?  "</blockquote>




I was so mad... I think he was trying to be funny... But that's not a good time to try and be funny. I means it's hilarious now! But then, not so much.


My best friend was having sex with her ex (when they were together) and he thought it would be funny to yell "cockadoodle dooo!" While they were having sex...lol

Quoting Tiger Lily ♥:" Well........ Dh and I were going at it...I raised up and he went down and we bashed each others head ... [snip!] ... but.....We just keep going. DH and I have had a lot of moments where things happen and we just can't help but laugh horribly."

ahahah oh god
the one where you were laughing hysterically into a pillow seriously has me laughing, cos i could picture that happening to me--
and OUCH to the head bang! ahha
yours are good  

Quoting Barfy McVomitron:" I've shared this on bg before. I pooped, diarrhea, on my hubs on accident whilst fornicating. it was ... [snip!] ... it happened the only thing I said was "I pooped on you" and nearly died laughing as I ran, butt hole clenched, to the bathroom"

oh my gosh   no way ahhaha
i almost wanna know the longer version of that story haha
like, what was HIS reaction?!

Quoting Kimber's Mommy:" having sex right after high school graduation with my then boyfriend. at my parents' house, in my room. ... [snip!] ... channel." THEN... the most horrible sex ever occured, i faked my first orgasm, then lied about how good it was. lmao."

oh gosh haha animal sex