re: Discovering gender

<blockquote><b>Quoting LolaMcKitten:</b>" Ok, so your thinking stems from trauma in your childhood - so you pass it on to your kids? O-o"</blockquote>




No. I'm saying I do NOT think that "other gender" toy and activity choices are bad. I'm saying I think that that's fine and idc what my kids play with. I'm saying only when it comes to their basic appearance, such as nail polish and clothes and hair, do I choose to step in and set boundaries.

<blockquote><b>Quoting Tiger Lily ♥:</b>" I think dressing your son as a girl to avoid gender stereotypes is pretty smurfed up and sick. He may ... [snip!] ... accepted or not, but he will. So...........I guess you could say your way of thinking is pretty crappy. But that's my opinion."</blockquote>



Have you ever thought maybe that the people you live around are just passing down what they were taught? A relative of mine lives in a very conservative part of the nation. Her 4 year old son wanted to be princess peach for Halloween. She tried to talk him into going as Mario to preschool instead. He insisted he needed to be princess peach. No one made fun of him. In fact the other boys decided they all wanted to be princess peach after that. They thought it was cool. And why shouldn't they? They're 4 and don't know hate yet.

Quoting LolaMcKitten:" WOW...again, that is some sick smurf. "

You are silly as hell. You really think you know it all. My children's intelligence, age-appropriate behaviors, manners, happiness and health are enough to validate my good parenting. I could not care less what you think darling. Have fun confusing your children at home and sending them out into the world to be hurt and disappointed!

Quoting Tiger Lily ♥:" I'd rather instill smurffy gender stereotypes than let my child experience a horrible childhood, IMO."

Children are going to be bullied no matter what by someone somewhere. I'd rather my child be bullied for who they are and what they want to be than be bullied for trying to fit in. Leaders are what I'm raising here... not followers.

<blockquote><b>Quoting Fatty McRunnerPants:</b>" Why is blurring the lines bad? Methinks you grew up to aspire to being barefoot and pregnant in the ... [snip!] ... he chooses. Why shouldn't it be like that? Why is that "bad"? Strict gender roles only confine people, it doesn't help at all."</blockquote>




I didn't grow up taught my beliefs on that or intentionally taught anything. I don't mean to offend anyone but if we're talking personal opinions then I do think that if its possible its best for moms to stay home with their kids while dads work. I know that's not always possible but that's what I can do and chose to do , and I love it. I do make corn bread and I go without shoes in my kitchen from time to time and you'll often mind me cleaning my house with a toddler around my leg and a baby belly :p I don't need to be in an office, or have a bug career, my husbands little income takes care of us fine for now and I have little kids at home. My biggest ambition is to raise them myself at home and not have daycare do it. I feel like you may be a feminist?

Oh and I'm not looking down on anyone who has their kids in daycare, I could have easily had to work but were in a fortunate position where we bought a house dirt cheap so we can do fine on dh's earnings.

I also don't want to offend anyone who chooses to be a working mom, I didn't mean anything like that.

Quoting speaktruth2powr:" Why would you allow your child to call his penis his "bad spot"? You should be having age appropriate ... [snip!] ... having age appropriate discussions of sexuality at home....it's not up to the school to teach your children that kind of thing."

the "bad spot" thing came from a discussion about how no one should touch him there but mommy and doctors, and that it was bad for them to do that. so when he was 3, yes, he called it that. I am not relying on the school to teach them. I have already had the sex talk with my 8 year old, which is why he now calls it a penis.

Quoting Barfy McVomitron:" lol we don't say vagina and penis...we call them winkys and hoo hoos. I don't say flatulence, I say fart. ... [snip!] ... I'm not sure if this was talked about in this post or not...gah I'm getting so old my memory is failing me. oh boy"

 

Quoting Mandy Schlatterer:" <blockquote><b>Quoting Fatty McRunnerPants:</b>" Why is blurring the lines bad? ... [snip!] ... fine on dh's earnings. I also don't want to offend anyone who chooses to be a working mom, I didn't mean anything like that."

What's wrong with being a feminist?

The fact that you have the rights and freedoms you do today is because of feminism.

You're welcome.

Quoting Brendan&Bethany'sMom:" I teach her everything she needs to know to become the intelligent young lady she needs to be one day. ... [snip!] ... mark. And if this makes me a bad parent so be it... I damn sure won't allow my son to wear a dress. Out of the question. "

 

Quoting Mandy Schlatterer:" Toys are different. I'd let my son have a doll and my daughter have a truck or whatever. But something ... [snip!] ... else and slept fine that night :p I'm just not sure what to say when he talks about who has a "wee wee" over and over lol"

I think that he will eventually just stop on his own. it's not a huge thing, and I don't think many people are going to be offended by it. he's young and learning.

Quoting Fatty McRunnerPants:" Why is blurring the lines bad? Methinks you grew up to aspire to being barefoot and pregnant in the ... [snip!] ... he chooses. Why shouldn't it be like that? Why is that "bad"? Strict gender roles only confine people, it doesn't help at all."

funny how in your statement the son wasn't wearing stilettos and the daughter wasn't wearing the hard hat then...

Quoting J+D=4:" funny how in your statement the son wasn't wearing stilettos and the daughter wasn't wearing the hard hat then..."

i found that ironic as well..lol

<blockquote><b>Quoting speaktruth2powr:</b>" What's wrong with being a feminist? The fact that you have the rights and freedoms today is because of feminism. You're welcome."</blockquote>


I believe in woman's rights 100% but like most movements that start out positive, I think it's gone too far and many of the followers of the movement try to deliberately prove their equality to men. Again, this is my opinion, but I think while we are equal in value, worth, and ability, there are differences that should be kept alive and passed down through generations. Divorce rate has raised with much if this feminism "I don't need a man" attitude. It's best for a dad to fulfill his role, a mom to fulfill hers, and kids to have both in one home. Of course things don't always turn out that way, but I think much of the divorce rate has woman to blame more than men. That's what we believe in our house and I don't push it on anyone, but that's how we feel. There's so much split custody and confusion and to put it bluntly I think a lot if times woman end their marriage way before "all hope is lost" because they have even more pride than the man and want to harbor their every little right. This is where I think feminism has gone wrong. For us to be able to vote and have any job etc, is great. But out whole culture us changing, and if you look at the average American family today, the results are not good

<blockquote><b>Quoting Mandy Schlatterer:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting speaktruth2powr:</b>" What's wrong with being a feminist? ... [snip!] ... is great. But out whole culture us changing, and if you look at the average American family today, the results are not good"</blockquote>




All humans should have equal rights, but I still think that gender differences should be acknowledged and not desperately fought against.

Quoting Mandy Schlatterer:" <blockquote><b>Quoting speaktruth2powr:</b>" What's wrong with being a feminist? ... [snip!] ... is great. But out whole culture us changing, and if you look at the average American family today, the results are not good"

Deliberately how? By asking to be paid the same amount as a man for doing the same job? Or by asking not to be raped for walking down the street? Or by *gasp* choosing to embrace their sexuality rather then be repressed? Or by standing up for what they want or believe in, instead of sitting in the corner quietly?

You don't think maybe the culture has changed because their is an increased dependency on technology that is driving wedges between family members or that economy is so bad that it is forcing both parents (in many cases) into the workforce to make ends meet?

No, no....it's all women.

Also, if you believe in "women's rights 100%", you are a feminist.