re: Oh My Effing God...DO NOT QUOTE

<blockquote><b>Quoting Vodka Knockers:</b>" Must be my personality. That man has seen me without make up, hair a mess, frazzled nerves and in pajamas ... [snip!] ... grand son. I seriously can't tell anyone, holy smurfing smurf. This dude is dead if anyone in this community finds out."</blockquote>




Lol well you're a very protected woman in your community now aren't you  
Like someone else stated just tell him in a very calm way. I guess that's your only option. At least if you tell him the truth it won't possibly wreck your relationship in the future like you stated.

Quoting Nathaniel'sMom:" <blockquote><b>Quoting Vodka Knockers:</b>" Must be my personality. That man has seen ... [snip!] ... your only option. At least if you tell him the truth it won't possibly wreck your relationship in the future like you stated."

I feel soooo uncomfortable right now.
My mind is racing between "Chris is going to kill him" and "Why do I have a vagina, it just complicates life" and "I wouldn't even smurf me, why does he want to? What is wrong with him?" and now I'm thinking about how gorgeous his wife is and very, very confused.
You know, he was probably high. He was probably very, very high. He gets prescribed a lot of medication, he over does it from time to time. But still, what if he wasn't. Eww. Oh god. This dude has "White Trash" tattooed on his stomach. FML.

<blockquote><b>Quoting Vodka Knockers:</b>" I feel soooo uncomfortable right now. My mind is racing between "Chris is going to kill him" and "Why ... [snip!] ... does it from time to time. But still, what if he wasn't. Eww. Oh god. This dude has "White Trash" tattooed on his stomach. FML."</blockquote>




I can only imagine. Let me know how it goes. I'm sure everything will be fine.

Some guys go after girls, just because they can. Plain and simple.

DH's best friend and his brother BOTH propositioned me. Both are married. Both on my birthday. Which was 3 months after I gave birth to my second son....who I was BFing around the clock...and I had an episiotomy. Ugh. Gross. Some guys are just such pigs.

Quoting Supafly★:" Some guys go after girls, just because they can. Plain and simple. DH's best friend and his brother ... [snip!] ... to my second son....who I was BFing around the clock...and I had an episiotomy. Ugh. Gross. Some guys are just such pigs. "

I'm really starting to believe that.
I mean, when DH cheated on me, the girls were hideous and it confused me. Now my neighbor who has a gorgeous, amazingly sweet wife is trying to sleep with me who is much shorter, much fatter, and couldn't give a smurf less about my appearance. I mean, that does come to mind. "What a pig." Not to mention she just gave birth to his child maybe two weeks ago.
I feel gross now. He really is gross, like really. I've never looked at him and thought about screwing him, ever. Even now, the most I can imagine is his beer gut with "White Trash" tattooed across it and that's enough.
This whole situation is just nasty. I think it's seriously upsetting my stomach, I feel nauseous.

<blockquote><b>Quoting Vodka Knockers:</b>" I'm really starting to believe that. I mean, when DH cheated on me, the girls were hideous and it confused ... [snip!] ... across it and that's enough. This whole situation is just nasty. I think it's seriously upsetting my stomach, I feel nauseous."</blockquote>


Sorry I cant stop laughing at the tattoo!!!  

Quoting lolajessup:" <blockquote><b>Quoting Vodka Knockers:</b>" I'm really starting to believe that. I ... [snip!] ... it's seriously upsetting my stomach, I feel nauseous."</blockquote> Sorry I cant stop laughing at the tattoo!!!  "

Imagine seeing it. Him and DH were comparing tattoos and he jerks his shirt off and just looked so proud. I was sitting there thinking "Why...Just why? Why the smurf would you call yourself that, much less have it permanently etched into your skin?" The tattoo alone just ruins any type of sexual thought I could have ever had towards him, not even counting the fact I have a lot of respect and fondness towards his wife.

<blockquote><b>Quoting Vodka Knockers:</b>" Imagine seeing it. Him and DH were comparing tattoos and he jerks his shirt off and just looked so proud. ... [snip!] ... thought I could have ever had towards him, not even counting the fact I have a lot of respect and fondness towards his wife."</blockquote>

Now I'm just expecting to hear he has kiss this tattooed across his ass haha

Quoting lolajessup:" <blockquote><b>Quoting Vodka Knockers:</b>" Imagine seeing it. Him and DH were comparing ... [snip!] ... fondness towards his wife."</blockquote> Now I'm just expecting to hear he has kiss this tattooed across his ass haha"

Honestly, I'm thinking it'd probably be more along the lines of Willie Nelson. But I could probably imagine him having that, rather easily. I wouldn't want to know about it, but I could see it being accurate.

<blockquote><b>Quoting Vodka Knockers:</b>" Honestly, I'm thinking it'd probably be more along the lines of Willie Nelson. But I could probably imagine ... [snip!] ... I could probably imagine him having that, rather easily. I wouldn't want to know about it, but I could see it being accurate."</blockquote>


 

Quoting Vodka Knockers:"

I mean, both DH's friend and the brother's wives are much shorter and fatter than me. I'm not the most amazing looking woman ever but I'm alright. I expected it from DH's friend's brother....that guy is just a sociopath that will sleep with anything that walks. He is attractive, though.
But DH's best friend....that one kind of stung. It pissed me off that he would not only betray his best friend, but he thinks that I would agree to something like that. And he's not good looking either. I think I weigh more than him....and I'm 120lbs lol.

And LOL @ that tattoo. It sums everything up right there lol.

Quoting Supafly★:" I mean, both DH's friend and the brother's wives are much shorter and fatter than me. I'm not the most ... [snip!] ... either. I think I weigh more than him....and I'm 120lbs lol. And LOL @ that tattoo. It sums everything up right there lol."

And it's funny to think I see so many memes online about women being smurf cheaters.
I just feel uncomfortable. I drive past his house every day, and now I'm going to feel weird. I feel like I should tell DH, but I really have to be tactical about this. I honestly think I should do it when I know we're going to be gone all day to give him time to chill out and get his thoughts straight because if I do it at home, he's going to be marching to the neighbor's house before I can say "HONEY DONT KILL HIM".
Damn. I try my best to stay away from bullsmurf and drama and some how I always get in these situations. This is just smurffy. I mean, all I did to provoke this in any way, shape, or form was keep DH's cell phone tonight lol. I wish I'd just left it with him.

Quoting Vodka Knockers:" And it's funny to think I see so many memes online about women being smurf cheaters. I just feel uncomfortable. ... [snip!] ... all I did to provoke this in any way, shape, or form was keep DH's cell phone tonight lol. I wish I'd just left it with him."

Right? I feel the same way about drama....I try to avoid it so much. All I do is stay home and take care of my kids FFS I don't even leave my house lol. But it always finds me.

It's up to you whether you want to tell your DH. I didn't tell mine because he would lose pretty much all his friends. It would just be one huge never-ending drama smurf fest, it's not even worth it. Maybe I will tell right before we move out of state lol.

I have never been high enough to randomly ask someone if they wanted to smurf :-S not sure that is a valid excuse. And I would hope not if he was the one home with the kids

Quoting Mrs. Reynolds:" I have never been high enough to randomly ask someone if they wanted to smurf :-S not sure that is a valid excuse. And I would hope not if he was the one home with the kids"

Oh no, he was driving home from work, which isn't much better if he was high. I know he smokes marijuana recreationally, as I used to get my marijuana that I use for medicinal reasons (Keeps me off of Vicodin, Xanax, and Seroquel XR) from him.
However, I do also believe he is on other stuff because he kept talking something about blueberries and how they're better than Aderall, so I'm assuming it's a drug. I don't know personally, I only puff here and there throughout the day for pain/anxiety.