must be nice..

Must be so nice to be my husband.

He hasn't worked in 4 months...closing in fast on 5. He worked construction for his uncle but messed up his shoulder through a combination of roofing and going to the chiropractor.. Told me in December he'd go back after New Years. Here it is over 2 weeks later and NOTHING.

Last week he told me he wants to go back to school for massage therapy. His old school lost his loans so they won't release his transcripts, and the school is in Florida so it's not like we can drive over and fix it.. (we live in Ohio).

So he's done precisely NOTHING to pursue that.

Ok. Fine. We have been scraping by on my barely more than part-time crap job. I don't really have a problem being the main supporter, but everything beyond finances is...well it's smurf.

He doesn't do the dishes, only touches the laundry if i ask him to... I work 4 days a week and when I get done I have to do everything around the house.... from dishes to dinner to laundry to...well I don't have to tell you ladies the list of housework and chores that need to be done...

So now he's gotten himself into the habit of staying up when the kids are asleep to watch TV, which means I go to bed alone, wake up alone, and have to juggle all 3 kids while he sleeps before I go to work. Half the time he's asleep within 2 hours of me getting home...

I'm just sick of it...all of it, and I want to punch him in the face and tell him he's being as selfish and inconsiderate as his useless flab of a mom...

HE sucks at being a stay-at-home dad. Can't handle the in-and-out stress of the kids, yells too quick and doesn't do Smurf regarding the housework. Oh yeah he'll wash what he needs to make dinner when I work my 2 nightshifts a week but...yeah Sunday when I get home at 3 I have a week's worth of laundry to do, a kitchen to clean, living room to vaccum... and I'm a housekeeper at a hospital. the LAST thing I want to do when I get home from work is clean.

UGH! I ~Seriously~ hate having a full-grown child for a husband.

I didn't have a job for the first 3 years of our relationship - I stayed at home with the kids... but I kept the house clean, had dinner on the table every night, took care of every little thing i possibly could to try and make his home life easier...but of course I don't get the same consideration....still trying to figure out the 'why' to that.


End Vent.

Then file for divorce and move on?

Maybe you should tell him he's being a selfish jerk?

Smurf that non-sense.
Seriously though, stop dealing with that BS and do something other than vent on here, you need to take action, now. If you don't put an end to it, I highly doubt he will.

Quoting iLL-Legal Alien:" Smurf that non-sense. Seriously though, stop dealing with that BS and do something other than vent on here, you need to take action, now. If you don't put an end to it, I highly doubt he will."

Couldn't have said it better myself.

I wouldn't be surprised if he is suffering from depression at this point. Has he talked to his doctor about it?

tell him too GROW UP!! when my SO was unemployed he didnt want to go look for jobs i had to force him off the couch ...I had to harass him everyday to get his smurf together....he got the point eventually ....like he finally didnt quit his job before he got his new one(he usually does) and he actually calls in to work when sick instead of no showing...some times it take a swift kick in the ass!! ..what you could do is just stop cooking for him do your laundry not his do dishes just for you and the kids e.t.c tell if he want smurf done do it himself or get a job

Quoting Amelia Margaret:" I wouldn't be surprised if he is suffering from depression at this point. Has he talked to his doctor about it?"

Totally agree with you on this - but getting him to go (AND KEEP) an appointment with his doctor is harder than getting him to do the dishes...

I know I need to talk to him but I never seem to have the time.. When the kids are up they interrupt any and all conversations we have, and when I get home he normally passes out because he doesn't sleep at night like I do... It's actaully really hard for him and I to have a conversation without the kids interrupting... besides I know it'll end in a fight (always does when I'm 'right') and we don't argue in front of our kids...

Quoting Deborah Stechschulte:" Totally agree with you on this - but getting him to go (AND KEEP) an appointment with his doctor is ... [snip!] ... interrupting... besides I know it'll end in a fight (always does when I'm 'right') and we don't argue in front of our kids..."

I have a very good friend who is suffering from deep, deep depression and has for years and it's affecting all parts of his life. He's very overweight, diabetic type 2, and never had a girlfriend. He gets very little sleep at night because he's so debilitated by his loneliness. I want so desperately for him to get help but he just won't do it because he says he feels uncomfortable asking his doctor about it. It makes me so sad, I wish there was more that I could do.