how would you feel..

its long im sorry. but just need to get out and get some opinions. My SO sister and her husband are driving me insane. I finally got tired and snaped on them. they are always barrowing things from us. food, money, cigs and If we so happen to run out of something and have to ask them they say sure but you have to buy us more and I do. but they come eat and or send their son to eat over here without asking first., I dont at all mind helping anyone out. but this is everyday. and a few months ago i started letting her watch the kids for me while i ran SO to work every morning. for 20 dollars a week thinking that would help. I was only gone for and hour and he only work 4 days a week. then she started no showing up to watch them 3 days out of 4 and still expected me to give her 20. so i paid her and started staying home and letting SO take the car.. after that they stopped asking to bum things they started telling us what they need and when they would be to get it. or tell us to drop it off. for one if your going to barrow from someone atleast ask first not tell them to your getting it.. then to top it of SO and i had a dr appointment and he had court one 2 different days. so we asked her to watch them again. she charged us 20 we were only gone maybe 2 hours. and when we got back she had fixed lunch for her, her hubby and stepson (all my food at my house) she didnt feed my kids and she didnt change my son after he had woken up ( he sleeps super late) so he was soaked. i still paid her what she said. and then the day of court she charged us the same. we were gone 3 hours and on the way home my mom called to say that she droped the kids off with her we were taking to long. my daughter was dressed. but she walked my son to my moms is a once again soaked diaper and no clothes at all. ITs freaking cold outside.. so I fed up, only paid her 10 this time.. and she didnt say anything about it.. I refused to let her watch them. but they still everday came to bum something and I really am so sick of it. so this week everytime they asked for something i told her i didnt have it. they called yesterday and ask what we were doing and so i told her i was paying bill. she said well dont forget you owe me money, so i said no i dont. Ive paid you well over enough. and she said well dont expect me to watch your kids for you anymore. she called her mom and told on SO and I. that just really pissed me off. so I tell both of them. I thought i was crappy that they talk smurf about my mom watching my niece and nephew and not my kids often.. ( only because their mom works and i dont so there is no need all the time) and she charges out the ass for her nieces and nephew. but can watch her other nieces and nephew for free for months at a time. and that its really smurfed up that on the rare occasion that i need to barrow something I have to buy a whole new thing even if its cup of milk i have to give them a whole carton. but they dont think they owe me when they cook a whole meal at my house to eat infront of my KIDS! or bum everyday without offering to pay us back not even a little bit. SO thinks that maybe we overreacted a little. I think I was right for saying it..


end of vent.. just want to choke them.

I didn't even read all of that. And you're letting them treat you like this... why? TBH it's your fault for letting them walk all over you.

Quoting Viv, Ev & Gwen ♥:" I didn't even read all of that. And you're letting them treat you like this... why? TBH it's your fault for letting them walk all over you."

you should of probablly finished it..

Need opinions on what? Sounds like they don't need to watch your kids. You don't owe them money. Stop lending them things back and forth.

Quoting Elaina Gilbert:" you should of probablly finished it.."

I did. My statement stands. You're the one that let it go that far.

Quoting ♫ boobook ♫:" Need opinions on what? Sounds like they don't need to watch your kids. You don't owe them money. Stop lending them things back and forth."

oops sorry. I guess i erased it.. i fixed it.. was suppoesed to say SO thinks that maybe we were being a little mean about what I said. and I think I was right to say that to them. Im sick of it.

<blockquote><b>Quoting Elaina Gilbert:</b>" oops sorry. I guess i erased it.. i fixed it.. was suppoesed to say SO thinks that maybe we were being a little mean about what I said. and I think I was right to say that to them. Im sick of it."</blockquote>


You were wrong in the fact it's not up to you what someone charges for one set of kids vs another. And maybe just said something from the beginning.. Don't smurf talk my mom.

And the rest is whatever. Your fault for letting it go that far. It is what it is. And let it go. Like I said, stop loaning things and you won't have to worry about it, and TBH if they would have pulled that stuff with my kid the first time, there wouldn't have been a second time watching them.

Lol. she deserves far more than what you told her. Cut ties, ASAP. It sucks, but until she wises up and respects you and your children, you dont need that in your life.

<blockquote><b>Quoting Ellie.:</b>" Lol. she deserves far more than what you told her. Cut ties, ASAP. It sucks, but until she wises up and respects you and your children, you dont need that in your life."</blockquote>

Cut ties? Over borrowing things? Little drastic. I'm sure they can figure out a way to be family without lending things.

And OP I didn't realize it was your SO's family. Obviously you gave them ammo for smurf talking otherwise they wouldn't have known about what goes on in your side of the family.

And as far as saying something you should have let your SO handle it, instead of getting in the middle of his family.

Quoting ♫ boobook ♫:" <blockquote><b>Quoting Elaina Gilbert:</b>" oops sorry. I guess i erased it.. i fixed ... [snip!] ... and TBH if they would have pulled that stuff with my kid the first time, there wouldn't have been a second time watching them."

I have said something to them about it before they just get mad and dont talk to me for a while..which SO and I were split up then so It didnt matter to me if they came around or not I had to put them in the place many of time. they stop for a while.. then when SO came back its started up again. . I know its my fault that they keep doing it, Its just annoys me the crap out of me that No matter what I say to them or tell them they cant barrow things they keep on and keep on. and SO gives in. Now that ive put an end to it again.. I was to mean.
as for them watching the kids. Those two days i had no choice. everyone else that normally would watch them had to work those days.

<blockquote><b>Quoting Elaina Gilbert:</b>" I have said something to them about it before they just get mad and dont talk to me for a while..which ... [snip!] ... them watching the kids. Those two days i had no choice. everyone else that normally would watch them had to work those days."</blockquote>


So, tell them no.  

Quoting ♫ boobook ♫:" <blockquote><b>Quoting Ellie.:</b>" Lol. she deserves far more than what you told her. ... [snip!] ... family. And as far as saying something you should have let your SO handle it, instead of getting in the middle of his family."

she hangs out with my sister and knows my mom. we all lived in same town for like 7 years now.. so no I didnt give her ammo for talking smurf..

I don't think you we're wrong at all! That's flippin rude of them and it sounds like most of this happens while your SO is at work, so I think it was fine for you to say something!!

<blockquote><b>Quoting Elaina Gilbert:</b>" she hangs out with my sister and knows my mom. we all lived in same town for like 7 years now.. so no I didnt give her ammo for talking smurf.."</blockquote>

Well, no idea then? Next time say no. And continue to say no. If you have a major problem your SO needs to handle it.

Quoting ♫ boobook ♫:" <blockquote><b>Quoting Ellie.:</b>" Lol. she deserves far more than what you told her. ... [snip!] ... family. And as far as saying something you should have let your SO handle it, instead of getting in the middle of his family."

Ha ha... is that all you got out of it? Just "borrowing things"? She sounds like a complete smurf. Treating OP's kids like crap (not changing their diapers, not FEEDING them), demanding money and being bitchy about it, and sounds like she gets pissy with OP if she's not allowed to borrow things. That's a LOT more than just "borrowing things". So YES. I stand by my statement. If her SIL cannot respect her or her family enough to treat them well, then yeah.... cut ties. She doesn't need the negativity in her life.