worst day ever

so today I found my fiance of two years and my unborn babys father has been cheating on me, virtually, not physically.... as what he says.... any advice? do I take him back and give him a second chance and if I do how do I make sure he knows that it's not okay to do it again.. or do I leave him kicked out (hes at his dads) and end our relationship.. I still love him with all my heart and care about him I just feel so stupid and disgusted.. and lost   please help! no negativity please ive already dealt with enough today! p.s. im due in 7 weeks too  

If you still love and care for him I don't see why you shouldn't give him a second chance. Just make sure you let him know how you feel and that it's not alright for him to do that.

so you know without a doubt it wasn't physically? How long has it been going on? Is this the first time?

What does virtual cheating entail, exactly? Like...webcamming with people or an emotional thing?

He specifically says "It's online, not physical" like that's supposed to be less bad. Which means he doesn't think what he did is that serious.

Would you have gone into this relationship if you knew he would enjoy having emotional relationships with women online?

Quoting Piecey.:" What does virtual cheating entail, exactly? Like...webcamming with people or an emotional thing?"

 

Honestly hun, if you love him and you BOTH would like to work on things then I don't see why not give him a second chance for the sake of your kid together and your relationship with him.

I hope he pulls his head out of his ass & realizes that it WAS serious physical or NOT! Smh.. Guys kill me with that trying to downplay their actions!  
Good luck I hope you guys can work things out..

<blockquote><b>Quoting J u l i a .:</b>" Honestly hun, if you love him and you BOTH would like to work on things then I don't see why not give ... [snip!] ... or NOT! Smh.. Guys kill me with that trying to downplay their actions!   Good luck I hope you guys can work things out.. "</blockquote>




I always get confused with this mindset. It was never about her not loving him. It was about her showing by his actions that he doesn't love or respect HER.

Quoting Red Bottom:" <blockquote><b>Quoting J u l i a .:</b>" Honestly hun, if you love him and you BOTH ... [snip!] ... mindset. It was never about her not loving him. It was about her showing by his actions that he doesn't love or respect HER."

I'm confused, what's your point?
I didn't say she didn't love him... Nor was I implying that.
& I agree his actions did show otherwise..

<blockquote><b>Quoting J u l i a .:</b>" I'm confused, what's your point? I didn't say she didn't love him... Nor was I implying that. & I agree his actions did show otherwise.. "</blockquote>




Obviously she loves him. She was in love with a stranger. Just because you are in love with someone who cheated on you and worked hard to do it, doesn't mean you should continue to subject yourself to it. She's not the one who should work hard in this situation. She did nothing wrong.

Quoting Red Bottom:" <blockquote><b>Quoting J u l i a .:</b>" I'm confused, what's your point? I didn't ... [snip!] ... you should continue to subject yourself to it. She's not the one who should work hard in this situation. She did nothing wrong."

Whether he cheated or NOT they are in a RELATIONSHIP it takes two people to be in that relationship.. Therefore she does need to work just as much as he does especially if she makes the decision to stay! She will need to work on trusting him as well as he would need to work on gaining that trust back.. She will need to work on forgiving him and he would have to work on gaining that back.

In a relationship you work TOGETHER just because one smurfed up doesn't mean you automatically have one up over the other and you can use that as a stepping stool in the book of smurf ups. She will have to work on getting past that and moving forward.. He screwed up but if she's going to be in a relationship with him and continue their family she is going to have to get past that and simply let it go...

<blockquote><b>Quoting J u l i a .:</b>" Whether he cheated or NOT they are in a RELATIONSHIP it takes two people to be in that relationship.. ... [snip!] ... going to be in a relationship with him and continue their family she is going to have to get past that and simply let it go... "</blockquote>




Yeah, she held up her end and he shut on his and then smurf on her. That's not working together. That's holding a bridge up with one arm.

Quoting Red Bottom:" <blockquote><b>Quoting J u l i a .:</b>" Whether he cheated or NOT they are in a RELATIONSHIP ... [snip!] ... held up her end and he shut on his and then smurf on her. That's not working together. That's holding a bridge up with one arm."

Lol... Either you've never smurfed up in a relationship before or someone has never smurfed you over cause you obviously don't get it.  

<blockquote><b>Quoting J u l i a .:</b>" Lol... Either you've never smurfed up in a relationship before or someone has never smurfed you over cause you obviously don't get it.  "</blockquote>




LOL

I just have a concept of self worth and not keeping myself in a situation where I'm not appreciated.

Feel free to join in. It's a lot less stressful.

Quoting J u l i a .:" Lol... Either you've never smurfed up in a relationship before or someone has never smurfed you over cause you obviously don't get it.  "

eh, I got it. *shrug*