Restraining/protective order

A couple days ago I posted about my ex randomly deciding he wants to be in the kids' lives. This isn't a problem w/ me as long as I know they're safe. I told him since we can't agree on parenting time, we need to go to court. He said fine & that was it. Today, he's been sending my mother & I nasty, threatening messages & just called me saying he was going to come take the kids and going on about how I'm such a whore, a bitch, etc.. He just found out I'm pregnant & getting married and that really set him off. He's being verbally abusive & saying he WILL come and get the kids whenever he wants for as long as he wants. He's told me often that I'm the only person who makes him so mad he "can't control himself". He has been physically violent in the past, but that was before the 180 day period that the restraining order mentions & I never called the cops, just had my parents come & get the kids & I. So, is that grounds for a restraining order? I know I can't tell him no to seeing the kids before we have a custody arrangement but I'm fearful he'll hurt me or take them & run. All I have is threatening FB messages, some angry texts & the phone call (which is not recorded. Is there a way to record if he calls again?) Sorry for all the legal type questions lately, I'm just not finding much on google & have to wait until the 23rd to speak with a lawyer. TIA

i would file for a restraining order immediately

Quoting bugs mommy☮:" i would file for a restraining order immediately "

Thanks for the response. I'm glad I'm not overreacting.

i have one against my sons dad

Threatening text messages is a criminal offense. Call the police and file a report. Then ask for an EPO. With the EPO they will give you a court date for later this week which you will need to go to. You'll tell the judge what happened and the judge will have the police report, and then he will decide if you need a permanent restraining order.

You need to do it in that order.

You also need to change your number once the police take the report. I would advise your mom to do the same.

Quoting Red Bottom:" Threatening text messages is a criminal offense. Call the police and file a report. Then ask for an EPO. ... [snip!] ... in that order. You also need to change your number once the police take the report. I would advise your mom to do the same. "

Thank you for the info. I should call the police now, yes?

I went through the same thing.. very abusive relationship where I was to scared to call the cops.. 3 years after the last time he laid hands on me he had a history of threats to me.. it took one time when our daughter was 2.5 for him to tell me he would kill me and he could make sure no one saw kaylee again (first time kaylee was threatened) and to know that this time he would make good on it (all on the phone) I hung up called the police department and got the ball rolling next day I went down to the clerks office.. filed a TRO.. it was a Friday Monday they approved it for 3 weeks until the court date.. went to court established a custody plan for my daughter an they expanded it 6 months.. went back 6 months later and the said with his criminal and mental health record that he was unstable enough they didnt want to risk anything so I had a 5 year RO put into place.. I had my word vs. his and our records. mine was nothing.

Quoting Brody & Astoria's Mama!:" Thank you for the info. I should call the police now, yes?"

Yes, immediately. The longer you wait, the longer it's going to seem like you aren't really in fear of anything he says.

you should of called as soon as you felt that his threats were becoming more serious

I have also been there, done that and if there is NO current custody agreement, you CAN keep the kids away from him and tell him to take his case to a judge!

Quoting S U Z I E:" I have also been there, done that and if there is NO current custody agreement, you CAN keep the kids away from him and tell him to take his case to a judge!"

Sort of.

She can keep his kids away from him, however it's a civil issue, so if he comes and picks them up....unless it's a special circumstance, there's not much a police officer can do.

it all depends if a custody agreement is in place, I he's on the birth certificate.. etc.. if there's a custody agreement through the courts it's parental interference... if he's on the birth certificate and no order is in place it's who ever have the kid in most state physically. if he takes them and he does not have custody with the threatening texts she could call the police and the might put an Amber alert out.. unless we know all the details it's hard to say anything

Thanks for the advice! I just got off the phone w/ the officer. I didn't know you could call the cops over phone calls or texts, I really wish I would've.
The cop told me that since I made that call, as long as I file a restraining order, even if he hasn't been served, they'll serve him & he can't take the kids. The only thing I'm worried about is that he will lie in court. I don't think he will, I KNOW he will. Can he lie his way out of a restraining order? Should I bring the facebook messages, copies of the texts & phone records w/ me? Can I get the phone records if my phone is pay-as-you-go (virgin mobile)
Thank you guys so very much, the officer told me about the Victim's Advocate program & gave me their number. I'm so relieved that I know where to start with this

bring everything. my ex lied and denied everything.. they looked up his record.. most judges who have been doing it long enough can see past lies and manipulation. they saw past his.. and if you knew my ex it's all he does.. he scared me for years even afterwards.. finally I said enough was enough.. he can't contact me except for very brief civil contact regarding kaylee I.e. " how is kaylee" I can say fine and that's it.. or visitation consist of 45 minutes a week professionally supervised.. but he has showed up in 3 years to that.. and finally I told him not to even promise her anymoreanymore he would see her.. he writes letters from jail to his mom to give her saying he will try hard to see her.. she doesn't even care anymore.. it helps that SO is amazing with her.

Quoting Brody & Astoria's Mama!:" Thanks for the advice! I just got off the phone w/ the officer. I didn't know you could call the cops ... [snip!] ... told me about the Victim's Advocate program & gave me their number. I'm so relieved that I know where to start with this"

You're over thinking this. He's likely not going to be in court when you tell the judge everything. Go to the magistrates office in the morning. They'll file an EPO, and then you'll take that EPO to the court (as she will instruct). You'll do what they ask and they'll give you a court date. More than likely they won't have time to serve it on him by the time you go to court so he won't be there. Court for these is generally within a few days.