When to draw the line at non-CIO

When my son was little I was never the CIO type. No I wouldn't necessarily run over right as soon as he made a small cry, I would wait and see what happened. But when he turned 1, I was done. If I couldn't do something like fulfill his need to be fed, changed, held, etc..and he wasn't sick and still cried, I would put him in his crib and let him cry. Sometimes it was just being tired and he stopped and went to sleep. Or I would check on him after 10 min and then he would quiet if I got him. Is this wrong? Did I screw him up for life? Because that's what I intend to do with the next one. I'm all for attending to my babies needs, but I babysat this kid recently who is 14 or 15 months and the only thing that would make her stop crying was me, standing up, walking around the house for her. Nope! Not going to happen! I was willing to just put her on my lap and try to rock her. Nope. So I put her in her crib, and after 20 min of crying she went to sleep. I told her mom what I did and the mom seemed OK with it, she said that's what she does at home.

I am pro-cio once the child is an appropriate age. I feel 1 is a perfectly acceptable age as long as its no more than 10-15 min at a time and not horrible screaming just kinda fussing and crying. I know when my kid is crying because they need something or when they are overly tired and just fighting sleep. They rarely have to CIO but there are nights or days (nap) where they need that 5-10 min.

Quoting RushLimbaugh:" When my son was little I was never the CIO type. No I wouldn't necessarily run over right as soon as ... [snip!] ... of crying she went to sleep. I told her mom what I did and the mom seemed OK with it, she said that's what she does at home. "

A few minutes? Not a big deal.

Letting a small child cry like that for 10 minutes? Nope nope nope.

And you seriously let somebody else's baby cry for 20 minutes? What's wrong with you?

Quoting NicoThunders:" A few minutes? Not a big deal. Letting a small child cry like that for 10 minutes? Nope nope nope. And you seriously let somebody else's baby cry for 20 minutes? What's wrong with you?"

I told the mom what I did she was fine with it and she does it at home. Do you not understand that?

Quoting RushLimbaugh:" I told the mom what I did she was fine with it and she does it at home. Do you not understand that? "

20 min is to long for any child. How would you feel if you cried for 20 min straight and there was no one to check on you.

<blockquote><b>Quoting RushLimbaugh:</b>" I told the mom what I did she was fine with it and she does it at home. Do you not understand that? "</blockquote>




Yes, but you did it first and asked permission after. Not a good thing to do.

5-10 min is the max for me at any age older than 1. I would never let her cry for 20 min 

Quoting RushLimbaugh:" I told the mom what I did she was fine with it and she does it at home. Do you not understand that? "

20 minutes is far too long for any baby or small child. Do you not understand that?

Quoting ✿LilyBear09✿:" <blockquote><b>Quoting RushLimbaugh:</b>" I told the mom what I did she was fine with ... [snip!] ... not understand that? "</blockquote> Yes, but you did it first and asked permission after. Not a good thing to do."

Yes you are probably right however the mom would not have answered the phone anyways when I called, she went to the movies with her husband.

I have done CIO with all three of my kids the they are perfectly well adjusted kids. If there no need that they need meet sometimes they just need to cry it out (although 10 min would be my max for a baby not 20).

Quoting NicoThunders:" 20 minutes is far too long for any baby or small child. Do you not understand that?"

Apparently not!! That's why I asked the smurfing question to see what your opinions were! You could have just told me in a nice respectful manner the first time like the other lady did and I would have given you a nice, respectful response. `

Quoting RushLimbaugh:" Apparently not!! That's why I asked the smurfing question to see what your opinions were! You could have ... [snip!] ... first time like the other lady did and I would have given you a nice, respectful response. `"

Didn't even realize I was being that rude, just appalled.
I'm going to bow out of this one, have a good evening ladies.

Quoting NicoThunders:" A few minutes? Not a big deal. Letting a small child cry like that for 10 minutes? Nope nope nope. And you seriously let somebody else's baby cry for 20 minutes? What's wrong with you?"

 
It's one thing to do it to your own kid, but I'd be smurfing LIVID if someone did that to my child. Especially since you didn't ASK her beforehand, you did it THEN told her.
14-15 months old is still a smurfing baby. Some kids can't even walk at that point, or say any words.
Just smurfing WOW.
Sounds like you were too lazy to get the kid to sleep, no matter what it took. Why even be a babysitter then?

This is why only my mom and BD's parents are trusted with my child.

Quoting RushLimbaugh:" Yes you are probably right however the mom would not have answered the phone anyways when I called, she went to the movies with her husband. "

Then you dont let the baby CIO and you wait until you discuss it with the parents. I mean what would of happened had then been very against it and they got angry and upset with you. If they are ok with CIO then check on the kid at least every 10 min. Kids sometimes have a hard time going down with a sitter because its off their normal routine.

Every child is different and has different emotional needs. So just because that child needed more cuddling doesn't mean someone screwed her up. Sheesh