Quoting Venus Penis Trap.:" My younger sister who is 16 has been admitted into the hospital for suicidal thoughts and seeing things. ... [snip!] ... she's okay .. Someone please, I need advice, has anyone been through this? With a family member, friend or themselves?"
I've had suicidal friends, and I was too when I was younger. The best thing is to be there for her... even if you don't want to hear the nitty gritty, listen. And dont say "You have so much to live for!" and things like that. Dont invalidate what she feels. Instead, say "You know, I'd be very upset if my boyfriend did that to me too. I can see why you are sad." She wants to be related to, not talked up to like she needs to throw away the feelings that make her feel bad. So validate her, but THEN move on. Say "I can understand why you are upset. I imagine that hurts a lot. Remember how we used to go play on the swings and it was as if the world didnt matter? Maybe we can go do that and be goofy, lets remember what made us happy as a kid." Ya know... just validate her and then try to get her mind off things.
A friend of mine committed suicide a mere few hours after I saw him in an incredibly tragic way. I blamed myself for not seeing the signs before. I realized that when people are that depressed a simple chance meeting wont change their beliefs about the world, but you CAN spark the change by validating their feelings no matter how trivial they are. If she said "Im ugly and no one likes me!" The answer isnt "But you arent ugly!" Its "I would feel pretty bad if others put me down too. It feels as if you are in competition with your 'pretty' friends, right? But you know what, they wear a bunch of makeup to look like they do. You have a natural beauty. I guarantee that a guy will love you for looking beautiful all the time as opposed to a fake mask. And remember that time you gave that homeless person your last bit of money.... people admire that you are so loving and caring. That goes so much further than applying the right lipstick! So I know that it may hurt you but believe me you have so much more than you realize!" Validate her.... and then help her get over it.
And sometimes, you dont need to say anything. If she screams and cries and you think "I dont know what to say...." dont say anything. Hug her, give her a kiss, and say "I love you." Hug her until it hurts. Let her scream in your ear even if it hurts. Take her out to beeat the hell out of a punching bag! And if she yells AT you, making you the human punching bag.... realize its just her way of saying she hurts and she doesnt mean it. Just keep loving her and being there.
My friend had people that loved him dearly and he didnt see it... I will somewhat regret not seeing the signs that night. But.... I am glad that he knew I did love him and I gave him a hug that night and meant it when I hugged him. Just MEAN everything you do, and thats a lot of what you can do. Say things and mean it.... listen..... and mean it.
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