Not sexually attracted to dh... what would you do.

Okay, so I have been married for going on 5 years now. I am 23 and have two kids. My youngest is one and every since I have been pregnant with him I have not been wanting sex with dh. I still had sex with him but just could never enjoy it. I had the mirena put in, then got it taken out due to issues with it so since then I have not had sex, which has been a few weeks because I don't want to take the risk and honestly I'm glad that my excuse. I don't know what to d. He looks the same he always has and everything but I just don't want sex with him. I use to have no problem being turned on by him but now it just annoys me when he tries. I am starting to feel attraction to other guys which I never really was before in our marriage. I love my dh and really care about him but this his a big issue!! Sometimes I think about leaving him but I really don't have a good reason. So what should I do. Help! Lol thanks!!

I've had the same problem ever since I was pregnant with my daughter, and it has gotten worse since I've become pregnant again. I blame it on hormones.

You need to bring the spark back. Go out on a date together, spend time alone kind of stuff.

I am not much help but if it makes you feel any better, I have an extremely low sex drive and I never want to have sex, ever. It has nothing to do with HIM per say because it isn't that I am not attracted to him, it is just that I don't want anything to do with sex.
When you DO give in to sex do you enjoy yourself?

what you need to do is spice up your marriage... the biggest issues couples have is not keeping the sex in their marriage alive. try to have sex once a week.... try different things. like get out of your comfort zone... watch pornos together or act out or try different positions... one things that good is sexting each other randomly... i know that one sounds crazy but i promise you it will work and after awhile you guys will just laugh about it which will bring you guys closer

Quoting :*:CHRiSTiNe:*::" You need to bring the spark back. Go out on a date together, spend time alone kind of stuff."

 

Go on a romantic weekend getaway.

We have tried dates, and it just doesn't feel the same. For me anyway :/ I don't even know why this happened he is a great guy and attractive but my feeling have changed. Its like I want a relationship with him just non physical. I feel like a horrible person but its like I don't enjoy sex even when I just give in and do. Its so weird.

I went through the same thing with my ex husband. After my second was born my sex drive went down the drain for a long time. Ar are now divorced. I left him because of the "I'm not attracted to you anymore " feeling. After I lost the attraction it caused a lot of fights over stupid stuff. We have been apart for two years now and I regret it so much. Try everything possible to make it work because you never know how u will feel later. I keep hoping we will get back together but idk if it will ever happen since I'm about to have another mans baby. I hope it all works out for you!

I felt this way for a while..then I realized it wasn't him I wasn't attracted to ..it was myself...it makes sense for you to...you find other guys attractive..do they give you attention etc? My guess is yes..you need to talk to dh the last thing you want to do is leave to go on to be unhappy with multiple unstable relationships...not good for the babies

Quoting jes26:" We have tried dates, and it just doesn't feel the same. For me anyway :/ I don't even know why this happened ... [snip!] ... just non physical. I feel like a horrible person but its like I don't enjoy sex even when I just give in and do. Its so weird.

you have to get out of your comfort zone... otherwise your marriage could either be over or you could possibly cheat on the poor guy

<blockquote><b>Quoting **§~~emily~~§**:</b>" I felt this way for a while..then I realized it wasn't him I wasn't attracted to ..it was myself...it ... [snip!] ... dh the last thing you want to do is leave to go on to be unhappy with multiple unstable relationships...not good for the babies"</blockquote>


I couldn't have said it better! This has been my life since I left my husband 2 years ago for the same thing OP is going through. Biggest mistake ever

<blockquote><b>Quoting **§~~emily~~§**:</b>" I felt this way for a while..then I realized it wasn't him I wasn't attracted to ..it was myself...it ... [snip!] ... dh the last thing you want to do is leave to go on to be unhappy with multiple unstable relationships...not good for the babies"</blockquote>


I feel like this is true too. I am having big insecurities with my body since baby number two. And yes I do get attention from other guys and I like it. But would never cheat on my husband and I want to try and stay together for my kids and hope to pull through this but its effecting him as well. We don't talk much anymore and I feel like I'm raising the kids alone. But when we talk we are like best friends we get along great and I love being around him I just can't get turned on by him  

This is close to the same issue I'm having lately, but I do enjoy the sex (usually) when we do have it. We started watching porn again recently and it has helped. I feel bad for DH because he's so turned on just by looking at me, but I'm not turned on at all by him and have to resort to fantasies of others during sex (usually Eric from true blood, Ryan Reynolds, and a random black guy with a big dick, lmao. Sorry if that was tmi!)

Then I would def. Say that's the case. You have to talk to dh let him know how you feel when you look in the mirror, join a cheap gym and start making yourself feel better. You don't want to live in regret like the person is saying she is. And if you're best friends..that is soooo hard to find in anyone..cling to him.

Go to counseling!