re: Not sexually attracted to dh... what would you do.

I'm pretty sure this happens to everyone at some pint in their relationship, and I'm a firm believer in love becoming a choice at some point. You don't feel attracted to him right now but I'm sure you didn't marry and start a family with him bcause be made you horny. Your reasons for staying married to him shouldn't be that either. You have to choose to try to make yourself happy again with him. I know that I need intimacy in my relationship and for me imtamacy is talking, snuggling, compassion, etc. for him intamacy, I know, includes sexual interaction. We both needed to make a choice at some point to be concious of one another's needs. You need to do the same.

If he's still the same guy you married. Treats you the same (which I'm assuming is well) and is a good father/provider, then leaving him because you aren sexually attracted to him right now, is a terrible thing to do to your family.

Also, this might apply, I was on anti depressants for a while free having my second and it made my sex drive disappear completely. I actually was incapable of having an orgasm. It was awful. Are you on any kind of medication?

<blockquote><b>Quoting MommaSav2:</b>" I'm pretty sure this happens to everyone at some pint in their relationship, and I'm a firm believer ... [snip!] ... sex drive disappear completely. I actually was incapable of having an orgasm. It was awful. Are you on any kind of medication?"</blockquote>



I don't want to leave because he is not making me horny. I don't even know if I want to leave at all. It has crossed my mind several time because I feel like other issues have come about because of it. No medication or anything like that. I honestly don't know why I feel this way and I wish I didn't.

Quoting jes26:" <blockquote><b>Quoting MommaSav2:</b>" I'm pretty sure this happens to everyone at ... [snip!] ... come about because of it. No medication or anything like that. I honestly don't know why I feel this way and I wish I didn't."

That is exactly how I feel too, sorry hun.

I am going to try making myself feel better and see if that helps. Its not only sex its anything physical with him I can't stand. Kissing, cuddling anything. This a real problem and I know he feels it too. I will try everything to save our marriage I just wonder if we got married too young and its finally hitting me.

<blockquote><b>Quoting jes26:</b>" I am going to try making myself feel better and see if that helps. Its not only sex its anything physical ... [snip!] ... feels it too. I will try everything to save our marriage I just wonder if we got married too young and its finally hitting me."</blockquote>

I started working out really hard when my second was about a year old and it helped me tremendously. I felt better about myself and it released endorphins which make you happy. Feeling better about myself made me feel better about us. And when he started noticing the difference in my body (even though hes a great guy and always thought i was sexy) it was like attraction overload. I couldn't get enough of him. And here we are, baking number three! Lol
Have you thought about starting a workout routine?

The best marriage advice I ever got was from American pie reunion..its so weird I got it from a movie but I suggest watching it lol. The dad said, you have to make time to be husband and wife , you can't always just be mom and dad. I took that to heart when I seen it because it made so much sense. We as mothers tend to think our only job is to be mothers, sometimes ypu got to let things go and be his wife. It helped mine turn from teetering on the edge to divorce to literally(this is waaaaaaayyyy tmi) having an all nighter last night. I am so much more attracted to him now and him me..

<blockquote><b>Quoting **§~~emily~~§**:</b>" The best marriage advice I ever got was from American pie reunion..its so weird I got it from a movie ... [snip!] ... to literally(this is waaaaaaayyyy tmi) having an all nighter last night. I am so much more attracted to him now and him me.."</blockquote>

My grandparents gave us that advice on our wedding day and they have been married almost 60 years (it'll be 60 years in June) and raised 5 kids and have 22 grandkids and 15 (soon to be 19) great grandkids. It's the best marriage advice I've ever gotten. It's so easy to fall into the mommy/daddy routine and just think of one another as your parenting partner and forget to treat one another like the person you chose for life. My husband and I have been together 7 1/2 years and married for three years and some change and are going on our third baby, we have to make time for a date night every few months and once a week or so we order out and watch a movie after the kids go to bed. As well as the random things we do for one another all the time. We have to make a concious effort to treat each other like our lover and not just our room mate and business partner. Lol

Thanks for all the advice ladies. I'm definitely feeling much better and I will try to male it work. I do love him so much so I know we can we just need to make time for each other again because our kids are involved in everything we do. I am starting to lose some weight, and workout so maybe I just need to feel attractive to be attracted if that makes any sense.thanks!!

im the same way. i love dh and find him attractive, but the thought of sex is repulsive