D&D "it's my kid I'll do what I want"

So the other day my mother saw a woman slap or hit her kid, and my mom said something to her. And the woman said "she's my kid, I'll do what I want" and my mom said "you don't own her"

Touché mom, right?

But anyways, I see a lot of parenting decisions being justified with "it's my kid, I'll do what I want" and I'm just wondering where you draw the line...

IMO, the whole attitude that you can do something that others may think is wrong or stupid because it's your life is fine if the only one affected is the one making the smurffy decisions. But when it starts affecting someone else, it's no longer your life and just your decision. So I think pretty much anytime you can't come up with any justification for something besides the fact that its "your kid" you should probably reevaluate your choices.

Idk, I see it on a lot of peoples' profiles though & I don't get it

Abuse is when it becomes someone elses business.

Quoting Cheeks mom:" So the other day my mother saw a woman slap or hit her kid, and my mom said something to her. And the ... [snip!] ... come up with any justification for something besides the fact that its "your kid" you should probably reevaluate your choices."

Are we talking a smack on the behind or beating? I am not debating this because I dont know the situation, but I do spank. Not beat savagely or hit in the face or hurt them badly, one good smack on the bottom dont hurt him and it is my choice as a parent and no ones business. If I saw that their is no way I would say anything, if I saw more than that yes I would get involved and probably report it, or call police, record it etc.

Quoting Cheeks mom:" So the other day my mother saw a woman slap or hit her kid, and my mom said something to her. And the ... [snip!] ... come up with any justification for something besides the fact that its "your kid" you should probably reevaluate your choices."

I feel the exact same way, and if I saw something like that, I would react the same way that your mother did.

If she full on smacked her child in the face I would look at her crazy too it also depends on the childs age.. My mom had no issue giving me a good pop in the mouth when I got out of line, and I wouldn't have wanted someone calling CPS on her.
However I do spank my child and that is my parenting choice..

I agree though, when it becomes abusive and the parent has crossed the line that's when it becomes someone else's problem.

<blockquote><b>Quoting Boog*sMama:</b>" Are we talking a smack on the behind or beating? I am not debating this because I dont know the situation, ... [snip!] ... I would say anything, if I saw more than that yes I would get involved and probably report it, or call police, record it etc."</blockquote>




I didn't see it, but I trust my moms judgement. But either way that's not the point of the debate, although you pretty much answered anyways. The question is do you think the idea that a parent always knows best for their child is true, that saying "it's my kid, it's my decision" is a good enough justification for parenting decisions.

Quoting Cheeks mom:" <blockquote><b>Quoting Boog*sMama:</b>" Are we talking a smack on the behind or beating? ... [snip!] ... for their child is true, that saying "it's my kid, it's my decision" is a good enough justification for parenting decison"

Ultimately yes it is your child your decision on how you raise them. When it becomes out of hand then someone needs to get involved, I personally have called CPS on a friend of mine because the baby lived in their filth drank out of moldy dirty bottles and slept in pissed and smurf in clothes and diapers for days on end. Truth is though although we dont OWN our children we CHOOSE how we raise them.

<blockquote><b>Quoting Cheeks mom:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting Boog*sMama:</b>" Are we talking a smack on the behind or beating? ... [snip!] ... for their child is true, that saying "it's my kid, it's my decision" is a good enough justification for parenting decisions."</blockquote>




Nope and ive voiced my opinion many times in circumcision threads

I just think that as parents and as adults we should push ourselves to make the best decisions we can in regards to our children, and I don't like the attitude that people should do what their parents did because they're fine or that no one else can say anything about how I parent because its none of their business. When we stop talking about things, and more importantly listening to other opinions, we stop growing. And I feel like saying "it's my kid my decision" is a great way to shut down any kind of productive conversation. And now I'm gonna hop off my soap box

I'm going to have say it depends on the situation. If the kid is acting up and the parent corrects them, then yes they no what is best for their child and no one has the right to intervene.


However, if the line crosses into abuse or worst, then yes someone needs to get involved. To say I'm the parent and I know whats best for my child is a scary thought when it comes to some parents, especially when most abuse of any kind ( mental, emotional, or even sexual) is somehow directly related to a parent ( either they know about it or are the actual ones doing it)

Quoting Boog*sMama:" Ultimately yes it is your child your decision on how you raise them. When it becomes out of hand then ... [snip!] ... and smurf in clothes and diapers for days on end. Truth is though although we dont OWN our children we CHOOSE how we raise them."

 

It is a cop out I agree there. Parental decisions should be based on knowledge and research on individual subjects. Unfortunately stuff like discipline or how it works depends on a child and their reactions. I dont personally feel spanking is the answer for everything as a matter of fact I can count on one hand how many times i have actually smacked my 5 year olds butt. Some people do use it as a cop out they are just done arguing with people who feel they know everything. Like vax's or circ "its my kid" but dont do the research on what is actually beneficial. What I dont like though is the people who automatically assume that you are wrong because you don't raise your child the way they would. Like I am uneducated because I vax, when honestly I have researched and still feel it is what is best for me, I have also been bashed on here for spanking, when no one realizes it is a last resort and rarely used form of discipline for my son.

Quoting Cheeks mom:" I just think that as parents and as adults we should push ourselves to make the best decisions we can ... [snip!] ... my kid my decision" is a great way to shut down any kind of productive conversation. And now I'm gonna hop off my soap box"

I love this comment, and once again agree with everything you said.

<blockquote><b>Quoting Boog*sMama:</b>" It is a cop out I agree there. Parental decisions should be based on knowledge and research on individual ... [snip!] ... also been bashed on here for spanking, when no one realizes it is a last resort and rarely used form of discipline for my son."</blockquote>




Hey I just realized you live in warminster! I had a boyfriend from there, lol...

And I really didn't just mean spanking. As much as I never want to spank, I think that if its used correctly and not just all the time or out of anger, it's nbd. I was just using that as an example. I can tell from your posts in just this one thread that its not just something you do because you can, it's something you've actually thought about