re: ***********

Quoting Red Bottom:" I can see you being taken to court for child support for this. #1 he's your boyfriend, not your husband. ... [snip!] ... okay with this....yet they have a few grand to hand you when it's all said and done? I see this being on dateline in 5 years. "

They would be a lot more likely to have a few grand to pay than the $100,000 it takes to do surrogacy in the US. $60,000 if they skip the agency. The plan described in the OP is still not a good idea though of course, as it offers no protection for her. I just wanted to point out how cost prohibitive surrogacy is here and why a couple would choose a less costly yet more questionable route. It's actually not uncommon to do it this way.

Quoting Ole' No Name:" I just texted her this: We talked about it for a while. And I don't think emotionally I could handle ... [snip!] ... now. It would just weigh on me that it was actually my biological child. know what I mean? That's not mean right?      "

I think it would be unreasonable for any woman to angry at another woman to turn down traditional surrogacy. It is the same as having your own child and placing him or her for adoption. You might suggest India as an option for them. It's much less costly than in the US.

Quoting Red Bottom:" Then he's an idiot for smoking weed, knowing that they can drug test him at random and that he can lose his job over it. "

Agree.

Yeah, no. Don't do that. I can imagine surrogacy is hard in itself, but to give them a baby that is biologically yours? I feel for them because they must REALLY want a baby, but this is a shady way of doing it, and it's more like selling a baby, which is illegal. They want you to have a baby that is biologically yours and her husbands and then give it to them for a few thousand dollars. That's going to end up in court. I'd still offer to do it the legal way, but tell her you aren't comfortable doing it like that.

UPDATE:
She texted back today and said..

We were asleep when you sent that text.
I am in no way upset, please don't let this make things awkward we really enjoy hanging out with y'all.

Hopefully she really isn't mad and this can just be water under the bridge.