What would you do? I need advice please

I apologize if this is long, but it isnt something I can talk to family or many of my friends about so I'd very much appreciate the advice.. 
I'm 25, mother to 2 children. No longer with their father, but I have a new boyfriend. We have been living together since april 2012. He's 38....my children's father is 40 :-/
Anyway, My SO and I have been together technically for a little over a year. But, for a year before that we were really close friends and messed around all the time. So, its like we have been together 2 years. We have a major issue. We have never ever had sex. He has an erectile issue and well, he cant get hard. He can get off, but it doesnt get nearly hard enough for us to have sex. He hasnt seen a DR in many years, doesnt have health insurance, and has blood sugar issues. He doesnt take any meds or anything.
Last year at tax time (Feb 2012) I offered to pay for him to see a DR using part of my refunds(I got $8000) so it was no big deal. But he refused to go...So I said fine, I'll wait til u can get insurance or go yourself... Fast forward to this summer, I couldnt take it anymore. We broke up but were still living together. so then we got back together.
Currently, he claims hes working on insurance, but still doesnt have it. He doesnt give a smurf about it and its causing HUGE issues with us. I want more children, and I fee; that sex is very important. I cant be satisfied sexually without it and I literally think about it 24/7... Its making me depressed, stressed, and miserable. I absolutely hate it...We are arguing alot over it and Im getting fed up. Its a huge deal...I dont mind waiting, but ive already waited 2 years and its getting old. he doesnt seem to care at all and I cant force him to do anything...

Soooo, my ? is, what the hell do I do? Do I keep waiting trying to deal? Do i tell him its over soon if he doesnt fix it? Do i end it now? Im really confused here.....

please help me ladies...

Personally I would not wait. I'd probably leave. It important to you and it doesn't seem like he cares enough to fix the problem.

if he's not even willing to do anything about it then I think I would end up leaving. Sex isn't everything but it's important and if he's not even willing to try and fix the problem or even find out what it is then it would be an issue for me. I couldn't stay in a relationship without sex and be happy.

Quoting Andi+Andy=Marley+1:" Personally I would not wait. I'd probably leave. It important to you and it doesn't seem like he cares enough to fix the problem."

Exactly...I mean, how long am I supposed to wait?   Im sick of feeling this way...Thing is, we will be living together til april when our lease is up, so i was gonna wait til march to make a decision. BUT lately we have been fighting about it all the time, im depressed and i dont know how to deal with it. i honestly dont think he cares if we ever have sex at all. im only 25... im not done having a sex life yet!

It doesn't sound like he cares to see a doctor at all. If it had taken this long I'd lose hope and leave.

When we finally got together after a yr of messing arounbd with no sex, i brought it up to him... then he told me this problem. this was dec of 2011... he said he wanted to see "what type of person i was" or if i was that shallow to give up because of no sex..

so i convinced myself for the longest time that i was a terrible person for being upset over this... but i really dont think im a bad person anymore

Quoting Raωkeℓ:" It doesn't sound like he cares to see a doctor at all. If it had taken this long I'd lose hope and leave."

:-/ but then i look bad for ending everything over sex...i truely believe(d) this is the guy i was going to marry...but i want another kid, and smurf, i need sex! wtf am i supposed to do?  

<blockquote><b>Quoting AshWinsMomma:</b>" :-/ but then i look bad for ending everything over sex...i truely believe(d) this is the guy i was going to marry...but i want another kid, and smurf, i need sex! wtf am i supposed to do?  "</blockquote>




You won't look bad. Many people leave a relationship because their needs aren't met. Sex is a need for many people. He isn't fulfilling your needs and that is a problem. Plus, his issue could be a big medical issue and he isn't taking care of himself if he doesn't see a doctor about it. You also deserve someone who takes care of themself.

oh its def a big health issue for him...about 7 years ago he was hospitalized for 3 days for his blood sugar issues...but he hasnt seen a doctor since. pretty sure hes diabetic...When I went to the gyno back in august I asked him about it, and he said that means my SO has a very big health issue going on and he needs to see a DR asap...even if he isnt concerned about the sex, he needs to go anyway. I told him that, but nothing still.... to me its just plain crazy... i know he loves me and he is an amazing guy otherwise, but this is the hardest damn thing to deal with...and im seriously at my wits end

Oh, and to add, like 8 months ago i bought some viagra off of my friend to see if it would work for us. and it didnt, at all. so its def a big health concern going on....one that i care about, yet he doesnt. i feel like im wasting my time...

<blockquote><b>Quoting AshWinsMomma:</b>" Oh, and to add, like 8 months ago i bought some viagra off of my friend to see if it would work for us. ... [snip!] ... at all. so its def a big health concern going on....one that i care about, yet he doesnt. i feel like im wasting my time..."</blockquote>



I think you are wasting your time. Why be with someone who had no concern for their own health? Or your needs...maybe give him an altimatum. He either goes to the doctor by the time the lease is up or you leave him and find your own place. You gotta be serious about it though

Quoting Andi+Andy=Marley+1:" <blockquote><b>Quoting AshWinsMomma:</b>" Oh, and to add, like 8 months ago i bought ... [snip!] ... goes to the doctor by the time the lease is up or you leave him and find your own place. You gotta be serious about it though"

Yeah Id already made that up in my head, I already offered to pay for him to go with my tax return this year too but he wont. So I decided if something doesnt happen by March then Im done. So I guess I should tell him that, and if he gets mad then I guess itll just be over and I'll know he was never serious about fixing it...

anyone else?  

I am not a sex freak & can go a while without but 2 years. Nah, I wouldn't have even waited that long, as you have.

its even harder to wait we have NEVER done it, and it will never ever happen unless HE chooses to fix it... 2 years of waiting and trying to be nice about it isnt working anymore