SO is SUCH a mama's boy! :l

we live in SO's parent's basement apartment and I love his parents so much! his dad is VERY laid back and works his ass off, and his MIL is awesome as well.

but someeeeeetimes...........I get frustrated with how SO can never say "no" to his mother. Me and SO are trying so hard to save up to move out on our own, as well as save up for some things we really need to get for DS (and they are fully aware of this). FIL makes decent money, but SO's mom put them so in debt with credit cards that his check is gone as soon as he gets it.

We usually put in $60 a week for food, and I pick up any odds and ends me and SO want to eat on my own.

So....SO gave $60 on Friday, on Saturday MIL asks for another $60. So asks why, and she tells him she used the first $60 he gave her to get Bare Essentials make up. It cost her $80. The woman doesn't even wear make up. In 4 years of knowing her, I've seen her wear make up probably no more than 3 times. not kidding. I don't mind if she asks for some money to treat herself, but $80 for makeup? I don't even ask SO for that. Come to find out she asked her husband, he said hell no to the makeup, so she asked SO.

he told her no more money and she got so angry. and on top of that $60, he paid her phone bill for her, just bought her a brand new $300 laptop for Christmas, and since FIL was low on $$ this year for xmas, he went out and got his mom a $400 ring from Kay that was from his dad.

now my car insurance is 6 days late, SO didn't pay his car payment yet, and he has $400 out of his check left. SO can just never say no to his mom, ever.

It's not so much that I'm angry, I just get frustrated so much!!!!! SO is letting me stay home from work for right now and take care of LO and use my extra time to study for school, as well as go to school. So whatever money we have coming in from him working, is the money we are trying desperately to save until I can get a job in the summer when my classes are finished.

I just feel at this rate, we will never save any money, ever. ugh.

Honestly it sounds like she is a shopping addict.

sorry for this being long, it's the first time I've ever ranted about it. I'd never say this to SO because that's his mother and it really is his money. But he just has a problem with saying "no" to unnecessary things. If they need help, I totally understand, I've given them $$ countless times to help. But we don't even have the money for your makeup, and you spend the food money on that!? after he just helped you with your phone bill? meh!

I don't want to say anything to SO either because technically it is HIS money, even though we have countless talks about how his money is my money because for 2 years I support him while I worked and he couldn't find a job.

Quoting P3RvYmCp3rv:" Honestly it sounds like she is a shopping addict. "

I've said that SO countless times. We all think she is, but what can we do ya know? She's maxed out countless credit cards, buys smurf just for the sake of "she wants it", and often she does throw and actual temper tantrum if she can't get the money for something. SO did say he would give her some $$ for make up, even though he thought it was pointless waste of money, but he told her he'd give $30 because the package she showed him was only that much. Come to find out she spent $80 on makeup. I wear makeup regularly but I could never spend that much, especially if we are struggling.

That is ridiculous, his mom should be encouraging him to take care of his own family instead of spending money on her.

id tell her flat out you have priorities that dont include makeup cellphones and computers. those are wants not needs and because of her wants youre not getting your needs taken care of right now.
she sounds like she needs a lesson on prioritizing her money.

Quoting TTC Queen Bee [8wks]:" That is ridiculous, his mom should be encouraging him to take care of his own family instead of spending money on her."

that's EXACTLY how I feel and why I get so frustrated. It's not my money so I can't tell him what to do, but it's the only income we have until I finish in April. SO makes good money, but it's gone after a few days because we have over $1100 in bills alone.

Quoting 'Lil Boo's mommy:" id tell her flat out you have priorities that dont include makeup cellphones and computers. those are ... [snip!] ... her wants youre not getting your needs taken care of right now. she sounds like she needs a lesson on prioritizing her money."

I wouldn't even know what to say to SO. after he told me about the makeup, I told him you need to stop saying yes!!!! and he didn't say anything. I understand wanting to help you parents and treat them for all the times they've helped and treated you, but there is a limit. My mother refuses to let me spend my own money, because I'm not working and she knows my family comes first. for Christmas she actually got made I got her a present because I'm not working and that $$ should go to LO.

that's the idea of saving I'm use to, so seeing SO just shuffle out money time after time to his mom for tanning, shopping, etc, it frustrates me.

and on top of it, SO has a hard time saving money on his own, so he's actually letting me take over the bills and put a limit on his spending. and I now know where he gets that from!!!! lol

Quoting ♥ logan's mommy:" that's EXACTLY how I feel and why I get so frustrated. It's not my money so I can't tell him what to ... [snip!] ... have until I finish in April. SO makes good money, but it's gone after a few days because we have over $1100 in bills alone. "

Have you talked to him about it? These kinds of things just cause more and more problems down the road.

Quoting TTC Queen Bee [8wks]:" Have you talked to him about it? These kinds of things just cause more and more problems down the road."

I did briefly because he didn't want her to hear.   I told him he needs to stop saying YES! he kinda kept ignoring the subject. I'm going to let it go for now, and the next time it happens - I'll sit him down and tell him it has to stop. At the rate his giving out money to her, we'll never move out, be able to be on our own, or pay off our hospital bills.

I'd tell him if he'd like to live in his mother's basement for the rest of his life then to keep it up. Otherwise, don't tell her he has any *extra* money. Tell her his cheque has been spent on priorities rather than make up and stupid smurf. SO's mom is addicted to the casino and spends so much money there. I think that's where SO got his gambling problems from.

Quoting shelbylynn [28 WEEKS!]:" I'd tell him if he'd like to live in his mother's basement for the rest of his life then to keep it up. ... [snip!] ... SO's mom is addicted to the casino and spends so much money there. I think that's where SO got his gambling problems from."

even when she knows he has little money left, she still asks. i really think we're going to live in their apartment forever. I want our own place for this reason! so we can save!!

Quoting ♥ logan's mommy:" even when she knows he has little money left, she still asks. i really think we're going to live in their apartment forever. I want our own place for this reason! so we can save!!"

Time to smack some sense into him then, whether he wants to hear it or not I'd drill it into his head. Gotta be persistent with men sometimes lol