perfect custody order

if you could have your choice and make the perfect custody order with your ex for your kids, so that you have them equal time, and no one paid child support. If you could have it any way how would you have it. Ex and I are trying to come up with something that we both have the girls equal time and not one have them. but i really have no idea other then one week on one week off, but that seems like way to long for me to go with out seeing my babies... so ladies any ideas

we had the one week off one week on thing for awhile, til my daughter started school. Then they changed it to her dad was her primary resident (had her from 5 pm sunday night until 5 pm friday). We'd get her 2 weekends, then he'd get her a weekend, etc. It wasnt completely even timeshare, because the judge absolutely wouldnt have her moving back and forth with school in session.

My mom and stepdad have it where they switch every week, split expenses 50/50 and have to live in my brothers school district.

A highschool friend of mine had it like this and if I need up separated from DH I'd love it if we could do this. Be this grown up about it.


Bother her parents lived in the same town, only a few blocks from each other. She could come and go at both houses as she pleased. She just had to let the parents know where she was gonna be. If she told her mom "I'm staying at dads" she didn't have to say for how long. It was known that she would be there until she told them "I'm going back to moms today."
If her mom grounded her, she was also grounded at her dads and visa versa.
They even spent some holidays together, step patents and all.

She had such a great relationship with her parents.
So thts how I'd want it to be.

When we first got joint custody of my stepson it was we got him tue, Wednesday and Thursday and half the day Friday then took him to her and h had him half the day Friday then all day Saturday, Sunday Monday. So basically 3.5 days each. She was residential parent And got benifits for hom. Worked out well except we ha to pay support and she started not getting him an we had him all the time and eventually got full custody. Now she pays us support an is supposed to split All expenses with us but that don't happen.

Which in order to do 3.5 days a week I would most Likely need to live in the same school district if they are in school unless the 1 who lived outside their discrrict picked them up on Friday after school and took them to school on Monday.

I like the arrangement a lot of couples are doing now where the kids stay at the same house and the parents move. Like they have an apartment or whatever and when it's the other parent's time with the kids, they go stay at their apartment. Seems like that would be easiest on the kids.

Lol obviously that's not ideal for everybody...for starters, you'd need to be able to afford that.

I'm not sure what I'd do if I were to split up with DH...I'd also want him to have the kids about half the time. One week on one week off seems like the most logical but you're right, that's a long time to go without seeing the kids  

Quoting Lizplustwo:" I like the arrangement a lot of couples are doing now where the kids stay at the same house and the parents ... [snip!] ... One week on one week off seems like the most logical but you're right, that's a long time to go without seeing the kids  "

im a single mom of two going to school full time, i can hardly afford my own dam rent non the less paying half rent for a second place

Yeah, like I said, obviously that's not feasible for most people. I just think it's a cool idea.

I also saw a family on TV where the mo w

Yeah, like I said, that's obviously not feasible for most people...I just saw it and thought it was cool. Sorry I can't be more helpful  

It's good that you and your ex are amicable, though, and trying to work out an arrangement that's best for the kids! I feel like I see too many couples going through a bitter custody battle...so good for you!

Quoting Lizplustwo:" Yeah, like I said, that's obviously not feasible for most people...I just saw it and thought it was cool. ... [snip!] ... that's best for the kids! I feel like I see too many couples going through a bitter custody battle...so good for you!"

oh haha we have had a very bad bitter custody battle, very very very bitter one lol but finally said smurf it new year new start no more bullsmurf. so we are starting off fresh

My custody arrangement with my ex is unique, and I think I am going to have to get that changed this summer because our daughter starts kindergarten in the fall. How we do it now is that we have joint physical and legal custody, and he has her on his days off from work(which varied from one day, to three, and some weeks it was 5 days off in a row). That works while she's not in school(but she is in daycare), but because we live in two different towns, it won't work in the fall. Unfortunately, he is insisting that she still go with him on his days off, but "he'll take her to school and pick her up." I see too many potential problems with that.