Quoting Talena_caro:" <blockquote><b>Quoting Kelly&Coralie:</b>" I've never smashed a plate or thrown ... [snip!] ... my 3 year old shares without thought. It's very hard but she will learn sadly 9 times out of 10 it will be the hard way.."
I don't have a child with ADHD or anythiung like that. Cora is being tested for Asbergers and she sees an OT every week.
That's awesome about the treatment in the UK. Here it is a battle to even get a doc to LOOK at a child. It took me almost 2 years of trying to find someone to see Cora. And now she is on the wait list to be tested at the developmental center.
Her issues do make it hard to deal or reason. When she gets upset or frustrated, she shuts down completely. Doesn't know what to do or say, has a hard time recognizing loved ones, etc.
When she's good, it's like heaven on earth, but when she is having a bad day, it's hell. No happy medium.
I don't know what else could help you, other than just being firm and consistent. I like the idea of her having to pay for repairs and for her own broken toys.
Do you have a cool down jar? It's like glitter, water, and small toys that you can shake like a snow globe and find what is in it. For cora, what works best is "cool downs" instead of "time outs".
it's when she has to take a break from the activity, cool down, vocalize what she wants, and go from there.
It works about 90% of the time, but it took about a year for her to get the hang of it. There are even times when she puts herself in cooldown (which is freaking awesome)
Maybe you could have a quiet corner? All the pillows, books, coloring supplies, calm music, etc, that she enjoys? And when she gets out of control, you can direct her there to cool off?