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I don't know when it can be diagnosed, but maybe he is OCD? Those sound like rituals that make him feel secure. You could try to take him to a child psychologist.

Quoting Spoonful of Jayson:" I don't know when it can be diagnosed, but maybe he is OCD? Those sound like rituals that make him feel secure. You could try to take him to a child psychologist."

What would a psychologist do on a 3 year old though?

Quoting Rista Kat:" What would a psychologist do on a 3 year old though?"

observe behavior. give you pointers. give you a true diagnosis, or tell you that there isn't one to be made. they wouldn't have them if they weren't helpful somehow, although I can't say I know much about it. if anything, it may just help YOU in dealing with this.

No parent wants to ever consider it but it's possible he's autistic even mildly. You need to have him checked out discuss what all you've written in your post to your childs pediatrician and let them know your frustrations and concerns.
Hope this helps.

Quoting Spoonful of Jayson:" observe behavior. give you pointers. give you a true diagnosis, or tell you that there isn't one to ... [snip!] ... weren't helpful somehow, although I can't say I know much about it. if anything, it may just help YOU in dealing with this."

That's the thing, he doesn't really "act" the way he does at home when he's in public or anywhere else for that matter. It's like no matter where he goes he has his own certain little quirks at each house. For instance, if he does something particular at my moms house, he wouldn't do it at home. It's weird.

I think I do need some help myself for dealing with it though. Sometimes I'm at a complete loss of what to do to help be "normal". I guess that's selfish of me.

Quoting Rista Kat:" That's the thing, he doesn't really "act" the way he does at home when he's in public or anywhere else ... [snip!] ... for dealing with it though. Sometimes I'm at a complete loss of what to do to help be "normal". I guess that's selfish of me."

No, that's not selfish of you. They always say that a happy mom makes a happy kid. I always thought it was just a cliche saying, but it's true. I've just recently found that out. If you're worried about a therapist or doctor not seeing his true behavior, video tape it. Or if you have a SO or DH, have them video tape it AND you handling it. Then you can watch it over again and critique yourself and try to make the situation easier on a daily basis. It may sound extreme, but sometimes we just need to take a step back and see things when we are not in that moment to realize what is really going on or what we should really be doing.

Quoting IrishMommyof3:" No parent wants to ever consider it but it's possible he's autistic even mildly. You need to have him ... [snip!] ... you've written in your post to your childs pediatrician and let them know your frustrations and concerns. Hope this helps."

I've talked to his pedi when he was a lot younger about it, because he's always been this way. He was in all kinds of therapy and overcame a lot. At his 3 year check-up she did mention she wanted him in speech therapy again, but that's as far as it went.

Quoting Spoonful of Jayson:" No, that's not selfish of you. They always say that a happy mom makes a happy kid. I always thought ... [snip!] ... a step back and see things when we are not in that moment to realize what is really going on or what we should really be doing."

I've never even thought of that. That's something I will definitely have to try.

Quoting Rista Kat:" I've never even thought of that. That's something I will definitely have to try."

I hope you're abe to find something that helps you!

Quoting Spoonful of Jayson:" I hope you're abe to find something that helps you!"

Thank you. This has been a battle for a long time. We've seen developmental pediatricians, had EEGs, MRIs, occupation, speech, and physical therapy - the whole nine yards. This was right when he turned 2 and I never got any explanation as to why he is the way he is. Maybe now that he's older it might be easier to "diagnose" something. I'm not sure if I'm even looking for that because I hate to put a label and make an excuse as to why he can't do something. But I know he's not like any other 2-3 year old walking down the street and it bothers me.

Quoting Rista Kat:" Thank you. This has been a battle for a long time. We've seen developmental pediatricians, had EEGs, ... [snip!] ... as to why he can't do something. But I know he's not like any other 2-3 year old walking down the street and it bothers me."

Sure. Of course it bothers you. My son is in speech therapy and it bothers me seeing him with the other kids at daycare that are younger than him with better speech.

You may just need to try different approaches for maybe 2 weeks at a time until you find one that works for you. Just try to slowly help him adapt to a "normal" lifestyle and see if it helps. But you would have to be consistant and allow him the tantrums without giving in. No one likes change. Of course, I'm not sure if you are willing to do that or want to do that.