Forums > Sex & RelationshipsPage 1 2by: BG Secrets

re: Forcing sex

posted 31st Dec
Quoting ♥ laura-marie + 1:" I know but sometimes its harder than that. Id say no and try and move but it didnt make a difference. ... [snip!] ... like I felt. like you have to do it. I thought if I didnt i was a bad girlfriend or he would leave me so i wouldn't fight him. "

This is exactly how it was for me and my ex...except he knew exactly what he was doing. He'd make me feel like smurf for saying no, even if I was bawling my eyes out and told him to stop, he wouldn't. In OP's case, he might not realize or he might be more selfish with his own needs. OP- You need to talk to him, let him know exactly how you feel and tell him that what he's been doing is against your will (pretty much rape), and if he doesn't seem to care or act remorseful then most likely this is how he is and all he ever will be, then you should leave. I hope that he just doesn't realize how much he's hurt you and you guys can work everything out, good luck! Keep posted
quotesmurfs?
I have 1 child & live in Maryland
posted 6th Jan
Quoting MysticWitchKat:" You need to call the cops and leave now, because that is rape. And you are under no obligations to keep ... [snip!] ... no obligations to keep him satisfied. Sex is about 2 people making each other feel good, not some 1902 wifely duty smurf that."

 

 
quotesmurfs?
I have 3 kids & live in Venezuela
posted 6th Jan
OP, talk to your husband and if he doesn't listen, leave. I went through a similiar thing with my husband. It caused a huge problem in our marriage and we eventually split up for about 2 months.

I eventually got so upset I flipped out on him and made him realize how serious his behavior was. Now he's doing amazing and never gets upset with me if I deny him sex.
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I have 2 kids & live in Iowa
posted 6th Jan
I am surprised to see how many of you have went through this. I am sorry to hear that. No one should feel forced into doing something that they dont want. Is okay to say "no" and walk away from the relationship if there is no respect. Everyone deserves better. Stand up for your rights!
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I live in California
posted 6th Jan
He is raping you. Some people don't acknowledge that rape takes place within a Marriage but it does, being his Wife does not mean you lose all rights to say no to sex. Married, relationship, friend, stranger if you tell a man no and he forces you that is rape period. If my DH pulled that smurf with me once you can guarantee I'd be reporting him to the Police.
quotesmurfs?
I have 1 child & 2 angel babies & live in Glasgow, United Kingdom
posted 6th Jan
<blockquote><b>Quoting BG Secrets:</b>" This is hard for me to admit but here goes. My husband is very pushy when it comes to sex. He sometimes ... [snip!] ... know how to bring this up with any of my friends in real life so any advice you can give me is appreciated. Thanks in advance."</blockquote>

I had a problem like this with my ex, three seperate times he when I was getting dressed for a night out he corned (im claustrophobic and I freak out if corned which he knew) me thinking he was being a playful alpha male and used his strength to over power me even though I said no he thought I was being coy for some stupid reason, until this third time where I put a plate over his head and threaten to remove his cock if he ever ignored my refusal..

No is no!!! If he does this again mace him!! Extreme but so is being raped by your husband who is meant to protect not harm you!
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I have 4 kids & live in Dundee, United Kingdom
posted 6th Jan
No means no, married or not.
If he can't understand that he's doing something against your will, you need to leave. It's not okay.
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I have 1 child & live in New Hampshire
posted 6th Jan
<blockquote><b>Quoting whitney ♥ ainsley:</b>" No means no, married or not. If he can't understand that he's doing something against your will, you need to leave. It's not okay. "</blockquote>




Tell me about simple and clear enough.
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I live in California
posted 7th Jan
When I was reading this.... I thought of myself. You are describing a part of my issues with dh right now. I'm now just sooooo angry all the time. We go to bed every night mad about how he wants sex & I don't & why. Yet i'm not pregnant. I'm voicing my opinions more bc i'm more hurt yet shows anger. I'm also becoming depressed.... I'm forcing myself to therapy bc right now I'm in a spot where this can make or break us. I know he has his ultra high sex drive compared to me but I can't take the argument every night about how I don't want sex. We've been trying to talk it out & etc. I love dh I don't want a divorce or anyone else. Good luck!
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I'm due November 21st, have 1 child & 2 angel babies & live in Odessa, Missouri
posted 7th Jan
I dont understand how anyone can be with someone who forces them to have sex if not they feel smurffy. That is just terrible and they are doing more harm than good by staying.
quotesmurfs?
I live in California
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