re: finally got the courage...

<blockquote><b>Quoting pilot Jess:</b>" He doesn't sound like a guy who is in it for you for thick or thin anyways, so why do something that ... [snip!] ... you'll someday barely remember. And there are good men out there who will love you, two babies and all. Hang in there mamma."</blockquote>




Thank you for that. I was actually worried that it was a fluke and I was staying for no reason so I picked up another test and it is definatly positive. this time the test line was darker and showed up sooner than the control line.

honestly the sad thing is that this is what everyone is telling me. but for some reason it's so hard for me. but in the end I can't picture doing it..No matter how hard it may be at first

<blockquote><b>Quoting pretty 'n' pink:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting pilot Jess:</b>" He doesn't sound like a guy who is in it for ... [snip!] ... me. but for some reason it's so hard for me. but in the end I can't picture doing it..No matter how hard it may be at first"</blockquote>




You don't have to picture the future. Just take it one day at a time with logical steps that lead to what you want ultimately.

Even IF it ends up being a false positive, he doesn't sound worth staying with. Don't you value yourself more than someone you have to tiptoe around to stay with? Don't you want to be with someone who would endure anything to be with you?

That's love. Don't settle no matter how this pans out.


I never thought I would love again after my divorce, only to find my true love. It's out there for you too, don't let life convince you otherwise.

Quoting pretty 'n' pink:" thanks ladies for all your replies. I hope he is just in shock and he comes around but if he doesn't ... [snip!] ... but I also want to choose him. And I'm scared to be alone and that no one else will love me if I have 2 kids by 2 men. Ugh fml"

I feel bad for your situation , I'd honestly keep my baby... If the daddy steps up wonderful if not I'm sure you'll find a decent man when the time is right. This man doesn't sound the least bit supportive in your decisions . Don't be scared to be alone momma , you have a little roommate in there for 40 weeks and he / she will love you unconditionally
Big hugs and good look!!

I haven't read through all of the comments, but I wanted to say that a man CAN legally surrender his rights to his child. Once it is done however, it's done, and he can't get them back. I am very pro-life but I am not here to pass judgement or shove my beliefs down your throat. You have to choose what is right for you, but I must say, I have been where you are. When I was 16 I got pregnant by my 20 year old boyfriend. He was from South Florida, and came to NC for a job. When I told him I was pregnant he was scared his mom would find out and asked me to get an abortion. I refused and he left me. 4 months later when I sent him a letter and told him that it was a boy, he wanted me back. We broke up again and he threatened multiple times to sign over his rights and finally I was like "DO IT ALREADY!!" Long story short, I am still in NC, he is back in FL, I'm 24, he's 28, we are both married to other people and I have 2 other children (besides our son in common) and another on the way. He never signed over his rights, I never got an abortion, and him and his family love our son. Your BF is probably just scared. Tell him how you feel and what YOU want. Either he will support you or he won't, but if he won't, you don't need him.

<blockquote><b>Quoting pretty 'n' pink:</b>" I told my bf that I didn't want the abortion. all he did was try to talk me into it and when that didn't ... [snip!] ... with and Idk how to choose between my bf who I love and a baby that I already feel an attachment to. How do I make this choice?"</blockquote>




I would choose the baby. How heartless of a man to say that. If he truely loved you completely he would never make you choose between your child and him. What happens if this relationship ends and then you have neother......I'm sorry that you are going through this.

While you may love him, he clearly doesn't love you, or he's in shock. He's acting like an ass right now, but that's what men do when they're scared. If you want the baby and you don't want an abortion, do what you think is right. Either he'll come around or he won't (hopefully he will), but don't do something, anything, that you may regret for the rest of your life to please someone that you may not be with this time next year. Good luck.

Quoting pretty 'n' pink:" thanks ladies for all your replies. I hope he is just in shock and he comes around but if he doesn't ... [snip!] ... but I also want to choose him. And I'm scared to be alone and that no one else will love me if I have 2 kids by 2 men. Ugh fml"

That's bullsmurf. Any man that is worthy of being with you and being around your kids won't care that your children have 2 different fathers. I used to think the same thing. I got pregnant at 16, that went to smurf, and I got pregnant again at 18 (also went to smurf). But I met a man while I was pregnant with m second son who was older than me, was in the army, and had no kids. I never would have thought he would want me. But he did. I had my son while we were dating and I married him a few months later. That child is now 5 and has NO idea my husband is not his father. My husband has raised him and his biological father walked away so my husband could be his dad. Now I have another son with my husband and we are expecting our second baby (my 4th). The only one of my children that doesn't look like my husband is my oldest. When my 5 year old was a toddler we went to my husbands deployment ceremony and all the men in my husbands unit told him how much our son looked like him. Nobody knew, and to this day, most people don't. You will find a man just as great, who steps up and loves your kids if your child's father won't. Men (especially an asshat like that) is easily replaced. Your baby can't be. If you choose abortion, choose it because it is what YOU feel is best. Don't choose it because it is what he wants. If he loved you he would never make you choose between the life of your child, or his love.

<blockquote><b>Quoting Ariel Buzanowski:</b></blockquote>




Please don't say those things. This is abortion survivors. A protected forum. Which means those types of things can and will be modded

Quoting HopingforaMiracle:" <blockquote><b>Quoting Ariel Buzanowski:</b></blockquote> Please don't say ... [snip!] ... don't say those things. This is abortion survivors. A protected forum. Which means those types of things can and will be modded"

yes can someone take that post down and block her out of this forum! I don't need to read that bollox today!

i agree with everyone else also once you get that attachment its all over try open adoption if u dont think you can do it on your own i promise that would be the best thing for u  )

Quoting pretty 'n' pink:" thanks ladies for all your replies. I hope he is just in shock and he comes around but if he doesn't ... [snip!] ... but I also want to choose him. And I'm scared to be alone and that no one else will love me if I have 2 kids by 2 men. Ugh fml"

It's hard, but I've been a solo mom and you can do it if it's what you want. I have a wonderful friend with two kids by two fathers. She came very close to terminating her second. She's just got engaged to a wonderful man. It was a long time coming, and her eldest is a teen now, but there's one thing I'll say for it - you tend to pick up the guys who are genuine, as long as you're not up for the one night stands. You deserve to be loved by someone who will love you unconditionally, whatever you decide.

Quoting Amber; ღ:" Do what YOU want to do. If you don't want to abort, then don't! If you do it JUST because he wants you ... [snip!] ... then you will probably end up regretting it, especially if you two break up. Men come and go, your baby will be there forever."