re: financially stable D&D

Quoting The Master:" You wouldn't get a house here that didn't need extensive work done on them for less than $400,000 here. ... [snip!] ... You friends may not mind it but the idea of having a 10 year old at the age of 50 does not fill me with maternal joy."

But this isn't about age, it's about money.

Does not being able to give your baby everything it wants/needs fill you with maternal joy?

You seem to get defensive and dance around realistic questions people ask you....like what your plan is when you go through your $500 in savings and live pay check to pay check, and have no money for the extra things you need now because you have a baby.

These aren't attacks, these are real life questions and situations that WILL happen if you have a baby and are not financially stable.

Quoting Red Bottom:" But this isn't about age, it's about money. Does not being able to give your baby everything it wants/needs ... [snip!] ... attacks, these are real life questions and situations that WILL happen if you have a baby and are not financially stable. "

Ok I get it fair enough ... no more babies. Because my financial situation is not going to be changing faster than the time I have.

Quoting The Master:" You wouldn't get a house here that didn't need extensive work done on them for less than $400,000 here. ... [snip!] ... You friends may not mind it but the idea of having a 10 year old at the age of 50 does not fill me with maternal joy."

I didn't suggest YOU should have a baby at 40 - as I said that I was referring to an earlier post making it out as if 40 yrs olds are all infertile. And personally it does fill me with maternal joy. I am pushing 40 & feel just fine with that idea. My health is great & I am in the best shape of my life...so I feel I can keep up with what I have going on just fine & if we add more to it, then awesome. I haven't always felt maazing while pregnant, but my health is good - so despite feeling tired & sick & achy I have no issues with blood pressure or diabetes or anything else. In fact, the causes for my miscarriages are related to Dh, so my risk for that doesn't even go up significantly.

I said this to you: "But whatever - that's just observation - the fact is, I think many bets are off it there is a timeline for a real valid reason, such as a health issue...and you seem to have a time limit."

Quoting The Master:" Ok I get it fair enough ... no more babies. Because my financial situation is not going to be changing faster than the time I have. "

Maybe no more D&Ds for you either, since you pout every time someone applies reason to your question.

I want to try and explain this in a way that will make you understand, but I have to note that you don't care to understand so it's a wasted effort.

If you can't afford your children, you don't have them. Sounds easy to understand. Apparently it's not.

Quoting Red Bottom:" Maybe no more D&Ds for you either, since you pout every time someone applies reason to your question. ... [snip!] ... it's a wasted effort. If you can't afford your children, you don't have them. Sounds easy to understand. Apparently it's not."

I'm not pouting I'm agreeing with you ... wth?

Quoting The Master:" I'm not pouting I'm agreeing with you ... wth?"

sounded like sarcasm.

Quoting Red Bottom:" sounded like sarcasm. "

Yeah because I'm sitting here in tears because of my sarcasm.

Quoting The Master:" Yeah because I'm sitting here in tears because of my sarcasm."

Case in point.

Quoting Red Bottom:" Case in point. "

Look whatever ... I get where you're coming from OK. I just wanted another baby before I leaped into the world of permanent birth control via chemotherapy ok ... That's all. It was a nice dream, glad you can sit there and say things like 'case in point' while I'm breaking down.

<blockquote><b>Quoting The Master:</b>" I'm making this thread because the last one dissolved into drama, and I know there were a few of us who ... [snip!] ... to continue his education and instead loves his current job and wants to get to the top with hard work and determination."</blockquote>




From what you have written, I would not consider you irresponsible for TTC.
You sound like an average young couple.
That said, I'd focus on getting financially stable and sound so that you can have a great life and provide one for your child. Great life doesn't mean you are wealthy and /or can buy anything you want, just everything you need with a few extras.

DaveRamsey.com is an awesome site that helps tremendously. It's based in the US but the principles apply.

Quoting TheNuge:" <blockquote><b>Quoting The Master:</b>" I'm making this thread because the last one ... [snip!] ... with a few extras. DaveRamsey.com is an awesome site that helps tremendously. It's based in the US but the principles apply."

I think I've looked at his. According to his calculatory thing apparently we can afford our lifestyle now and (if we stop buying lunches and eating out, and buying non-essential items) we can save about $1500 a month once we've finished on the tiny loan we've got. That loan is up on the 25th of Jan.

I think if you can provide for a child its okay to TTC. We were TTC when we knew full well that the baby would be born right before DH gets our of the military (baby is due a week before). We are not well of but we can afford to pay our bills but is tight after that. Mainy because two cars of our broke down at the same time and we had to buy another. Costing us more money.We don't have a savings but we can afford to care for a child. We always find a way to make things work

<blockquote><b>Quoting The Master:</b>" I think I've looked at his. According to his calculatory thing apparently we can afford our lifestyle ... [snip!] ... items) we can save about $1500 a month once we've finished on the tiny loan we've got. That loan is up on the 25th of Jan."</blockquote>




Cool. Are you going to TTC?

Quoting TheNuge:" <blockquote><b>Quoting The Master:</b>" I think I've looked at his. According to his ... [snip!] ... finished on the tiny loan we've got. That loan is up on the 25th of Jan."</blockquote> Cool. Are you going to TTC?"

I would really love to, SO seems to think we should and so does my mother. However I'm having doubts now.

<blockquote><b>Quoting The Master:</b>" I would really love to, SO seems to think we should and so does my mother. However I'm having doubts now."</blockquote>




It's a big decision. To me, it sounds like you are ok financially just not great and "ok" is reasonable to have a child IMO.
But, other issues have to be considered that you brought up in your other thread.