re: financially stable D&D

Quoting Mom of Tristan/Rayah +1:" My husband has older parents and he doesn't like it. His Dad is going to be 71 in February and he is ... [snip!] ... for your children have them when you are young enough to enjoy them. OP you are financially stable IMO to have another baby."

Thier age difference is relative to mine and my moms. I am 34 and she is 66.

Your hubby may not like it (no idea why) but I have never had a problem with it.

And since I started my family late, I hope my kids dont grow to 'not like it'.....you would think people would value alot more about their parents then age  

<blockquote><b>Quoting TheNuge:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting Mom of Tristan/Rayah +1:</b>" My husband has older parents and ... [snip!] ... stable IMO to have another baby."</blockquote> The same can be said of many younger dads and their children."</blockquote>


Then those younger Dads aren't trying my father and brother have lots in commom as to other families i have seen with younger parents. My father inlaws mantality is very old school and even dressed like it and Darren find that very embarrassing.

<blockquote><b>Quoting Shannonsfirst:</b>" Thier age difference is relative to mine and my moms. I am 34 and she is 66. Your hubby may not ... [snip!] ... I hope my kids dont grow to 'not like it'.....you would think people would value alot more about their parents then age  "</blockquote>




If you would meet my father in law you would know why.

<blockquote><b>Quoting Shannonsfirst:</b>" Thier age difference is relative to mine and my moms. I am 34 and she is 66. Your hubby may not ... [snip!] ... I hope my kids dont grow to 'not like it'.....you would think people would value alot more about their parents then age  "</blockquote>




It also not really his age that bothers him it is the way he acts and perceives my husband. Darren doesn't like to be smothered and his father tried to do that. Hard to explain but he is a different kind of guy and I find my grandparents seem to be different in their attitude and everything compared to FIL. So it could just be his upbringing as well as he was the only child. So he tried to raise his son the way he was raised and Darren wouldn't have it. My FIL mother still cut up his food for him until he was married. MIL had to put a stop to that.

<blockquote><b>Quoting Mom of Tristan/Rayah +1:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting TheNuge:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting Mom of Tristan/Rayah ... [snip!] ... younger parents. My father inlaws mantality is very old school and even dressed like it and Darren find that very embarrassing."</blockquote>




Lol. Sure but you can say the same for young dads.
Lots of BG mommy's have uninvolved BDs.

We make $130k between the both of us. We are almost debt free besides our cars and they are close to paid off. SO still doesnt think we are financially stable for another baby. I think we could swing it, but SO doesnt think so. Basically his outlook is "If you have two kids thats TWICE the money spent on college, clothes, food, cars, etc." So we are probably going to wait another 4-5 years for a baby...

I want another one though...

I also think people should wait until they can AFFORD another child. Some people just keep having kids and yet they have to get gov't assistance because they cannot afford food after all of their bills......well then stop having kids.... 

<blockquote><b>Quoting Mama to J ♥:</b>" We make $130k between the both of us. We are almost debt free besides our cars and they are close to ... [snip!] ... have to get gov't assistance because they cannot afford food after all of their bills......well then stop having kids.... "</blockquote>

That's crazy! You guys sound like you can afford another baby easily. We have a 12 year old and a 19 month old and we are having another one a we make around what you guys bring in.

Hopefully you decide to have one sooner then that. Doesn't matter the age gap between your children you will have to pay it no matter what. Or how long in between you wait. My Dad has always said what's another mouth to feed. You end up wasting food so why not feed another baby with it. Which is true. I had 3 siblings and my parents didnt have a lot of money growing up but still provided for us. So I know if they were scared about finances none of s would be here today.

Quoting Mom of Tristan/Rayah +1:" <blockquote><b>Quoting Shannonsfirst:</b>" Thier age difference is relative to ... [snip!] ... and Darren wouldn't have it. My FIL mother still cut up his food for him until he was married. MIL had to put a stop to that."

you made it out in your first post that it was all about the age....

<blockquote><b>Quoting Mom of Tristan/Rayah +1:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting Shannonsfirst:</b>" Thier age difference is relative to ... [snip!] ... and Darren wouldn't have it. My FIL mother still cut up his food for him until he was married. MIL had to put a stop to that."</blockquote>




Yup. Plenty of weird moms and dads out there.
It doesn't matter what age your parents are. If they are weird, they are weird.

<blockquote><b>Quoting TheNuge:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting Mom of Tristan/Rayah +1:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting ... [snip!] ... Yup. Plenty of weird moms and dads out there. It doesn't matter what age your parents are. If they are weird, they are weird."</blockquote>




Yupp I agree with that.

I think that if you're able to feed yourself, and your kid, put a roof over their head and buy some decent clothes then why not?

We are in a similar situation!
Our combined income is about 90k a year. I work part time and am in school working toward a MD.
We are also getting married in 10 months, paying for it ourselves AND looking into buying/building a home within the next year- year and a half, we rent ATM.
We want another baby, our daughter is 4.5. Right now, money is tight because of the wedding. We each also have a small amount of personal debt (about 3k each and 1 car payment (my car was just paid of last year!)

We are looking to bank the money we get from the wedding, save for another year and use that as a down payment on a house because by that time all of our personal debt will be paid off.

We will still have a car payment as a debt.

So it's like are we stable enough to bring another baby into the world in a year? How much longer should we wait? Should we wait until I'm done with medical school? It's frustrating and kind of stressful but I guess things will pan out how they are supposed to!

Quoting Mom of Tristan/Rayah +1:" My husband has older parents and he doesn't like it. His Dad is going to be 71 in February and he is ... [snip!] ... for your children have them when you are young enough to enjoy them. OP you are financially stable IMO to have another baby."

I have parents that old & although I *thought* my friends young parents were "cool" compared to mine, most of that was immature teenage nonsense (my mom does have zero fashion sense though - so that part isn't cool - lol). All of my friends loved my parents. I don't mind it now at all...I also have no complaint because I was the last. They either had me when they were older or I simply wasn't going to exist at all (they were busy having my siblings before I came along)....so personally I'm quite glad they had no age issue & didn't quit while younger. ;)

<blockquote><b>Quoting justanothamotha:</b>" I have parents that old & although I *thought* my friends young parents were "cool" compared to mine, ... [snip!] ... my siblings before I came along)....so personally I'm quite glad they had no age issue & didn't quit while younger. ;)"</blockquote>




My husbands dad was 38 when he got married to his mom. It may not be everyone's experience with older parents but it is my husbands experience.

Iam glad that yes that they still did have my husband as I wouldn't be married to him. But his sister also thinks the same thing about her Dad. But maybe it is just my FIL cause he is different.

Quoting Mom of Tristan/Rayah +1:" <blockquote><b>Quoting justanothamotha:</b>" I have parents that old & although ... [snip!] ... married to him. But his sister also thinks the same thing about her Dad. But maybe it is just my FIL cause he is different."

That could be true because although I love my parents & they are overall good parents, there are still some things I would have liked to be different & age never even factors into my thinking on that subject. Same could be said for Dh. Sure I'd love to have my parents around longer, but you get the time you get & I ma well grown by now so if anything would happen, I am going to weather it fine...same could have been said for the last 15-20 yrs.