Festive blues

I absolutely detest this time of year, only thing that makes me happy is seeing my kids happy. But I know the hell I will have to endure ever Xmas, Boxing Day, my birthday and new year, my family make my life a living hell, I can't buy them a present that they won't complain about even if they asked for it, I'm criticised for everything I do, and when Xmas is over I get to do it again on Boxing Day. Most people enjoy their birthdays and get excited when it nears...not me, my sister is the apple of my mothers eye and I've known this since I was a child, nothing makes my mum happier than fighting with me on my birthday or my sister reminding me how worthless I am..my SO bought me a cookie cake as a small part of my birthday and my mum came down on him like a ton of bricks for sending £12.00 on me, of she had known he had bought me more than that she would have phoned to make me feel bad for getting gifts when it could have when on my child ( who already want for nothing) btw a £12 cake is to expensive for me but she bought my sister a iPad and gold braclet for her birthday last year. New year I hide because my sanity has taken to much of a bashing that if I didn't I'd probably break.

I can't wait til this time of year had finished so I can go back to normal