toddler & newb

any single moms have to juggle a toddler and a newborn? How do you do it? Im having such a hard time, my house is always a mess and my toddler keeps trying to pick on my newb.

My ergo and patience. lol

Oops sorry I am not a single mom.  

i guess technically i am not a single mom but we only see my husband maybe one full day a week so i just try to teach the toddler touching baby is ok but gentle touch and i showed him how to softly handle sister included him in changing her even if just talking to him about how he would help me by smiling while changing her or just simple little lessons and making sure they still get some attention and getting them on the same nap schedule has been my saving grace i am sure

I just went with the flow and there were some good days and some bad days but we made it. I know it can be tough but try and make time for both so the toddler does not feel left out. My house was always a mess and I just had to clean whenever they were sleeping. It always helped to have one set thing to do each day to help keep the house clean. Good Luck the benifits always out weigh the stress in the end :-)

I am having alot of issues being a single mom of 2 under the age of 2 but im also going through ppd right now. Everyone keeps telling me it gets easier once the lo starts crawling and walking but somedays are alot harder than others. You just have to teach your toddler to be careful with the baby and designate one room a day to clean thats what i try and do and i try and do a load of laundry each day so it doesnt get piled up

We were in the process of divorce when my second was born. My first was 19 months when she was born. It was TOUGH. And yeah, my oldest had jealousy issues and picked the smurf out of his sister when I wasn't looking. Literally, I would put her down to change her diaper and when I grab the diaper (so, what, a few seconds? ), he would already hit her. He was a ninja about it. I couldn't put her down because he would try hitting her. She lived in my Moby for a while or I would put her in her swing behind a baby gate so he couldn't get to her (she would sleep and that's when I would cook dinner or whatever). It sucked. The oldest very, very rarely hits her, but she picks on him. I secretly laugh, while I sent her to time-out. Lol.
My house was a disaster all the freakin time.
It got easier when he stopped picking on her.. around 5 months. And when she was 7 months old, their father went on deployment, so I was doing it all by myself (before, he'd help). What helped us survive until he got back was routine, routine, routine. But it DOES get better. I promise.

My kids are 2 and 3 1/2 now. My house is messier now than before, but it's gotten SOOO much easier. Yeah, it still sucks sometimes (esp when they throw tantrums, gang up on me, and smurf like that), but they entertain each other and play (or fight) while I clean up the house or whatever I need to do. It really, truly does get better! I didn't believe either. And just last night, I sent them to bed, but they kept talking to each other and giggling. I left them alone for a while, but eventually I went to check up on them. They were cuddling (their little cheeks were glued together! lol) and they both told me that they were each other's best friend. Things like that makes it all worthwhile.

No... but I'm abot to be. I've got over my inabiliy to say, "yeah, that'd be awesome!" when people offer to help me with my two year old, pick something up for me at the store, etc. I also live near family and form as many mommy-bonds as possible (through as many venues as possible). I plan on the newb being in a wrap as much as possible, too... and I have gated/am gating off my apartment into areas... leaving water bottles and snacks in bins near places I'll be sitting with the newb/nursing areas...

Accepting help is really all I can offer but I'd love to hear about your experiences!

i dont know how you do it but you are my heroes!

Quoting Diana plus 2:" We were in the process of divorce when my second was born. My first was 19 months when she was born. ... [snip!] ... glued together! lol) and they both told me that they were each other's best friend. Things like that makes it all worthwhile."

You just gave me some hope. Mine are 18 months apart my toddler is 22 months old and my lo is 4 months old and somedays i feel like im going completely insane. I just really hope it gets better soon

Quoting mom2andrew&carter:" You just gave me some hope. Mine are 18 months apart my toddler is 22 months old and my lo is 4 months old and somedays i feel like im going completely insane. I just really hope it gets better soon"

It will, I promise.
But don't get me wrong, it gets hard when they're both toddlers, but it's a different type of hard. They fight a lot and I see a lot of jealousy issues still. For example, my DS (the 3 1/2 year old) is NOT a cuddler. He was always very independent. But if he sees that his lil sis (25 months) is watching him, he'll crawl into my lap and cuddle while he's staring at her because he knows that'll make her cry. He's starting to not do that so much now, though. Now, they're working on the whole concept of sharing, because they fight over toys all the freakin time.

You will be fine. It be hard and there are times when you feel like you're pushed to the limit, but I promise, you'll be capable of so much more than you ever realized. It IS difficult and I HAVE cried into my pillow because the stress was too much and it got to me. Like I said, it will get easier once the baby actually starts doing something (like playing with toys with the older one).

Here my babbbeezz <3 from the summer <3

I hav a 2 yr old n a 3week old n its hard my son is amazing with my daughter but he is always pikn fights with my neice and my houe us also always,a mess n my daughter was always heald in the NICU cuz she was a preemie that now she,always wants me to hold her she will scream until I pick her up im finally learning ways to trick her to think I am holding her n making my son pick up after himself has been great but its hard hope things get better for u