re: Rape and "Birth" Rape (maybe a trigger)

Quoting Vivian [♥]:" same here, a little tug and it came right out  "

Lucky.. it snapped when they tried to do that for me, I had two midwives, a doctor and a surgeon up there trying to get it out.
My birth went nowhere near according to plan, but no smurfing way would I call it rape. I had to have medical procedures to save my baby, and ended up in theatre for a manual removal of my placenta because it didn't detach. Boo hoo, we're both alive and thats what counts. I had so many hands up my hoo ha after he was out that I'm pretty sure thats what caused the tearing and grazing, not him coming out

Quoting  Amanda(::" <blockquote><b>Quoting Vivian [♥]:</b>" same here, a little tug and it came right out  "</blockquote> I couldn't bring myself to look at it lol"

I still haven't looked at mine. SO did though, and he showed his cousin when we got home from the hospital   His cousins gf was about to have a baby so he wanted to see it. Weirdos lol

Quoting Marlee*TTC*:" I appreciate ALL of y'all's opinions, I was just trying to understand the term "birth" rape. I just never ... [snip!] ... I will always feel angry at that term I suppose, and I can't explaine why except to say your drs had a reason my rapist didn't."

You do realize they estimate 1 in 4 women are raped. They don't estimate anywhere near 1 in 4 women thinking they experienced a birth rape. Just look at the number of women in this thread who never heard the term before....so clearly it isn't something being talked about all the time. I think you may be shocked how many women say they were birth raped who experienced a sexual rape prior to making that statement.

The ONLY two women I have ever known personally to say they experienced birth rape WERE rape survivors & I sort of thought that they may have felt like it was a birth rape BECAUSE they had been raped prior so what another momma might have felt was a violation they were able to get past, to them felt like something much more significant.

While I can't say I agree with the terminology for sure, I do dislike that people assume that when a doctor shoves their arm up a woman's vagina for any reason, that it's always medical. Sad reality is that it's not, doctor's can be horrible people and rapists as well. The joy of rape culture, people think that date rape isn't rape still so I imagine if some woman was traumatized by a doctor inserting them self elbow deep into their vagina after a birth (which may or may not be traumatic on it's own!) they'd probably be told to grow up or that they had a reason for that (when no...they might not of) and their trauma would be trivialized even if it's proven that they were assaulted.

It's not just not having your birth as planned, if someone violates you that shouldn't be trivialized.