re: adoption... don't do it.

<blockquote><b>Quoting Monkey Nuts:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting ♥ darah ♥:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting ... [snip!] ... break the contract at any time with no penalty I never would have signed."</blockquote> So they closed the adoption?"</blockquote>




yes we agreed to open. then after my grace period (the time in which I could go backin my word and take the baby back) they stopped talking to me. when I finally got in touch with one of the women she was practically schizophrenic and talking like an insane person and screwed me over a SECOND time.

<blockquote><b>Quoting ♥ darah ♥:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting Monkey Nuts:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting ♥ ... [snip!] ... with one of the women she was practically schizophrenic and talking like an insane person and screwed me over a SECOND time."</blockquote>


I'm so sorry that happened to you. Will you be able to contact your daughter when she's of age?

<blockquote><b>Quoting Monkey Nuts:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting ♥ darah ♥:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting ... [snip!] ... time."</blockquote> I'm so sorry that happened to you. Will you be able to contact your daughter when she's of age?"</blockquote>




yeah.. but I'm barely even halfway there.

My heart is broken for you Darah. I'm so sorry ;(

That is just so smurfed up. Do they completely ignore you when you try to contact them today?  

<blockquote><b>Quoting £egendary £ex:</b>" That is just so smurfed up. Do they completely ignore you when you try to contact them today?  "</blockquote>

I have only been in touch with one of the women. she was really nice for awhile. David and Danni and I went to xmas break one year. she said I would get to meet her finally. then at the last second changed her mind and said "oh her psychologist believes it's a bad idea." bullsmurf. it was xmas weekend. not a psychologist in the world was working. plus she changed her mind right after spilling her guts about how she wanted to adopt again blah blah blah and "if youknow anyone who can give Hannah a sister or brother we would be so thankful" swear to good she was trying to get me to give her another baby or.manipulate a desperate friend into it. funny she thought that by talking to me for a couple months Iwould just up and decide she's some class act. she avoids actually talking to me but sent an xnas card a couple years ago.

Quoting ♥ darah ♥:" <blockquote><b>Quoting £egendary £ex:</b>" That is just so smurfed up. Do they completely ... [snip!] ... Iwould just up and decide she's some class act. she avoids actually talking to me but sent an xnas card a couple years ago."

one of the women? is this a gay couple   just making sure lol.

That is smurfing NUTS she said that to you   what in the actual smurf

I'm so torn. I was adopted and I am grateful that my mother didnt chose to abort me but at the same time I personally know that me giving my child up would feel worse than an abortion to me.

I don't know what to say. I hope you find some sense of healing. Please know that your child is glad to be alive.

xx

<blockquote><b>Quoting £egendary £ex:</b>" one of the women? is this a gay couple   just making sure lol. That is smurfing NUTS she said that to you   what in the actual smurf"</blockquote>




yeah they were lesbians. I was Google stalking them the other night and holy eff dude. they are just crazy. I could see public court records and all sorts of shift.

<blockquote><b>Quoting whoknowsx:</b>" I'm so torn. I was adopted and I am grateful that my mother didnt chose to abort me but at the same time ... [snip!] ... to me. I don't know what to say. I hope you find some sense of healing. Please know that your child is glad to be alive. xx"</blockquote>



do you talk to your birth mom?or ever want to?

Quoting ♥ darah ♥:" <blockquote><b>Quoting whoknowsx:</b>" I'm so torn. I was adopted and I am grateful ... [snip!] ... Please know that your child is glad to be alive. xx"</blockquote> do you talk to your birth mom?or ever want to?"

Well, my Mom adopted 5 of us. But then again, she didn't really go through an agency and she didn't have to pay anything to get us- her husband was native so that's how she got us. (People still look at us funny when I call her Mom because I'm full Native and she's the whitest woman you'll ever know). When I was younger, I didn't want to talk to my birth parents, because I was confused and I never really had that desire (but my birth parents also made plans to see me, and my brother and I would wait all day, and they would never show) so I guess I quit waiting and quit wanting to wait. Now that I'm older, yes, I wish I could have had that connection, I guess. I mean, I don't have very many memories from when I was with them (I was adopted at 2), now I wish I would have known more.

But my Mom would have NEVER closed an adoption unless it was in the best interest of us (and at a time- it became what we needed in order to heal). I am so sorry that you are going through all of that, those people sound horrid! I'm sorry that you feel that way about adoption- I know that being on this side of adoption- that sometimes it is the very best for a child to be adopted. I wish there was a way that I could help. I hope that one day you will be able to heal and that one day you will be able to see your LO when they are ready.

<blockquote><b>Quoting ♥ darah ♥:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting £egendary £ex:</b>" one of the women? is this a gay couple ... [snip!] ... stalking them the other night and holy eff dude. they are just crazy. I could see public court records and all sorts of shift."</blockquote>




 

Quoting ♥ darah ♥:" <blockquote><b>Quoting whoknowsx:</b>" I'm so torn. I was adopted and I am grateful ... [snip!] ... Please know that your child is glad to be alive. xx"</blockquote> do you talk to your birth mom?or ever want to?"

Whats funny is that my bio mom and I live within 2miles of each other in NYC. I have always had a "relationship" with her when she wanted one but I wont lie, I did grow up resenting her. Alot of that has to do with broken promises from her to me... and because she acts like she is doing me a favor for being in my life.

I am now at the age and maturity that I realize that her recognizing that she could not care for me was a selfless decision and I am able to forgive her and move forward.

I have friends who are adopted who also feel similarly. They have let go of any anger they may have had initially towards their birth moms and are at peace with the fact that we are all doing the best we can. I hope you can find peace too.

my mom & uncle (so her brother) were adopted by my grandparents. I think my mom still wishes to this day that she had met her bioparents, but they never sought her out, & while she wanted to find them once she was 18, her brother was completely against it, so it kind of stopped her. I guess he'd stay stuff like, "for what? probably just whoring it out on a corner"   (they had different sets of parents too, so... lol)

I'm sorry you had a bad experience. It's so sad when one party gets screwed over by the other. We went through an adoption scam and it broke our hearts. Unfortuantely, there are bad people on both sides. We we were really close to giving up on having a family all together, but we stuck through it and now have 2 beautiful boys through adoption. We have a great relationship with both birthfamilies.

i hope some day you are able to heal and you can have the relationship you want with your child's birthfamily.