Oh Lord, save me..

I NEED YOUR HELP, PLEASE.

Ihave no idea what to do. I was holding up this christmas.. Putting on a smile and a brave attitude.. But I just got the news my dog died. My best friend died in 2007, aged 12, with leukemia.. I lost so much in life right there.. My all time dream was to have a dog, and miracoulsy, on my way back home.. we found an abandoned dog. I rescued him right away. My mom didn't take it but I kept pushing until we got him. I was the happiest girl in the planet.. and even tho my heart was completely broken and I missed my best friend so much.. Kooky (my dog) soon became my support. We were so close.. ALWAYS together. You can't even imagine.. it really is true that dogs are our bestfriends, too.. He made me appreciate life all over again.

Well, 2 years ago we moved houses and my parents decided I couldn't have him anymore.. so he went to my uncle's farm. I visited him 1 time. ONCE. ONCE IN 2 YEARS! I always told my mom I wanted to go there because he was getting old and I wanted to say goodbye and she kept postponing it..

This christmas I got the news he died a month ago.

In addition to the immense pain I feel realizing he's never coming back..
I have these horrible feelings that

THEY ALL lied to me,
They raised my hopes saying we'd visit him soon, knowing he died..
They never drove me there, no matter how many times I asked.. Even tho the same happened to my bestfriend Marta.. i always asked to go there and my mom never took me there, God knows why.. Even when I knew she was going to get her wings pretty soon.. Same happened to my dog..

I don't know how I can forgive them.. honestly.. i feel so broken because I am so mad with my family members and i have no idea if I will ever forgive them..

And I also have this guilty feeling that if he stayed with us instead of my parents sending him off to the farm (even tho he was very much loved there), he would still be alive to this day.

The thing is.. I knew all along. I had this feeling in my heart that he has passed.. But I wanted a confirmation.. just something.. and nobody gave it. I Feel so alone right now.. especially because it's a dog and I'm afraid no one really understands me...


Im sorry for all this but my face is just soaked in tears and I can't stop thinking of everything... I miss him already.............

My pets are just like members of my family, so I definitely understand. And I'd be highly upset with them if they were my parents.  

I'm sorry for your loss <3

<blockquote><b>Quoting Rain (aka Mama):</b>" My pets are just like members of my family, so I definitely understand. And I'd be highly upset with them if they were my parents.   I'm sorry for your loss <3 "</blockquote>




I agree! Was there any other way you could of gone to the farm without depending on your parents to take you? Jw

Quoting ***BGLICIOUS****:" <blockquote><b>Quoting Rain (aka Mama):</b>" My pets are just like members of my family, ... [snip!] ... I agree! Was there any other way you could of gone to the farm without depending on your parents to take you? Jw"

No.. it's 4 hours away from home, and in a little village in the mountains. You need a resistant car to get there.. And I went there with my mom on her car.. the closest Public transportation is like 45 minutes away!

i found a puppy about 2 n half years ago we looked for the owners and no one claimed him so i took him in he was my best friend and in july of this year he got out of the yard and got hit by a truck i looked for someone to blame myself even god!! but what happend happend and its part of the grieving process im sorry for ur loss just try to think of the good times and that they were loved !!!

Soo very sorry for your loss, I cant even imagine what it wod be like if I lost my Sara. Blessed be