Quoting Squeaky McGee:" Hugs. You shouldn't feel bad for grieving. It's normal to wonder what might have been. Glad you got your rainbow baby."
Thank you. I don't know how I feel or how I should feel half the time. It's not like it was, I think I spent nearly every day crying for the first two months, but it still gets to me sometimes. I'm happy to have my son but I wish I could have somehow had them both.