Secretiveness?...

PLEASE DO NOT QUOTE.

DH has my passwords/emails to everything I have FB, emails, etc. He checks my smurf all the time. Well, I only have his FB password (because I upload pictures when we take them, etc.) I check his phone every once in a while simply because I do not trust him. He lies to me all the time...so obviously I'm not going to trust him. I have never cheated on him and I'm always as upfront as I can be about everything. Well anyways DH uses my laptop...He recently created his own little user thing and told me it didn't have a password, but he was signed on just now and it had went to the "password" thing because he had closed the screen when I came into the room. My user thing has a password, but he knows the password and it was only because I used to leave it at my grandmothers and everyone was always getting on it downloading smurf. I feel like he's trying to hide smurf... What would you do?

I wouldn't be with anyone who lied to me all the time.

Sorry I didn't read past 'i don't trust him'
You don't need to be with someone you cannot trust, plain and simple.

I'd be pissed. Its the same way with me and SO. I caught him lying about smurf threw his ass out and he was back within a week. My friend called his cell and I was hanging up with her and a password thing popped up. Sneaky bastard when he moved out put a password on his phone. Hmm wonder what he was doing the 5 days we didn't live together  

<blockquote><b>Quoting loser mom:</b>" I wouldn't be with anyone who lied to me all the time."</blockquote>




!!!

i would take myself out of that position and move on.

Quoting Ole' No Name:" Sorry I didn't read past 'i don't trust him' You don't need to be with someone you cannot trust, plain and simple."

 

He gave me the password and tried to tell me "he didn't know it was there," bullsmurf YOU have to put it there...I looked through his history...he's been looking at half naked women...searching them as "sexy tattoos for women..." (I caught him at the porn smurf...I guess he was trying to "hide" it this time...)

Computer accounts aren't hard to break into.

But in reality I wouldn't be with someone I didn't trust. Especially if I'd caught him lying to me all the time.

I don't feel like "marriage" should be thrown away without giving it a decent try...So I'm trying my hardest to give it a chance and him a chance to change...needless to say it isn't really working...but when I'm fed up I'll go.

This relationship is sooooo unhealthy.

You shouldn't be able to say you don't trust the person you're married to or even with.

If you don't trust him, Leave him. Plain and simple.
You could find 10x better.

Quoting ♛ Rudeness.:" I don't feel like "marriage" should be thrown away without giving it a decent try...So I'm trying my ... [snip!] ... hardest to give it a chance and him a chance to change...needless to say it isn't really working...but when I'm fed up I'll go."

You're right, you should try to make it work, but he's not pulling his weight. You said all this smurf just recently happened, does that sound like a guy who's trying to work on his marriage?

Quoting MysticWitchKat:" This relationship is sooooo unhealthy."

        

Honestly checking someones phone and whatnot is not healthy. You don't trust him and it doesn't really seem like either of you are working towards trusting each other.

Go to counselling, sit down and talk it all out. It's not a healthy relatinoship and it's not a healthy environment for the children to be in. Not saying you are bad parents, but they take relationship cues from their parents, and do you want your kids to think that that relationship is the best relationship to be in?

If there is no trust then the relationship is less likely to work out. Try counseling because if your just going to sit and wait for him to change on his own then your making yourself look like an idiot for staying with someone like that. If you know or have a feeling that he is hiding smurf then he more then likely is, just for the fact he knows he can get away with it and you won't do smurf about it, your letting him have his cake and eat it too. If one or both are unhappy in a relationship that has absolutely no trust then gtfo so you both can have that chance of actually finding "the one" because its obvious that if he's still doing that smurf recently, he doesn't want to work on the marriage.