daughter doesn't want to go

if you're not with your child's father, and they have recently started to go for visits every other weekend and your child expresses that they don't want to sleep there anymore do you still force them to go?

My daughter is turning 4 next month, she's spent three weekends there so far and has been telling me she doesn't want to go anymore.
I can't really get any straight answer out of her as to why
I kind of feel bad making her go, but I don't think I have much of a choice in it

I'm hoping there isn't anything bad going on.. he's not the greatest person in the world so I do worry. but I try not to question her too much i don't want to put things in her head and skew her anwers.
blah!

thoughts? do your kids enjoy going to their dads?

I would talk to the judge then and tell the judge she has expressed she doesnt like going.

It took my son awhile to get used to it so he would cry and scream anytime he would have to go. That went on for about 2 months. Now he adores going over there.

ETA: I would give it some time. Kids don't handle change as well as do. If it's still happening after a few months I would bring it up with your daughters father and figure out a way to make it easier on her.

If it is court ordered they HAVE to go, regardless of whether they want to or not.

Describe the lead up for her to go to the visit. Do you psych her up? Do you talk about how you'll miss her?

When she gets back, do you talk about how much you missed her when she was gone?

Quoting Aphrodite0405:" I would talk to the judge then and tell the judge she has expressed she doesnt like going."

Really? That should be the absolute last resort unless there is abuse or neglect happening.

yes, because it's court ordered. they don't give a smurf what your kid thinks until they're around 12 years old.

Quoting speaktruth2powr:" If it is court ordered they HAVE to go, regardless of whether they want to or not. Describe the lead ... [snip!] ... up? Do you talk about how you'll miss her? When she gets back, do you talk about how much you missed her when she was gone? "

 

Quoting speaktruth2powr:" If it is court ordered they HAVE to go, regardless of whether they want to or not. Describe the lead ... [snip!] ... up? Do you talk about how you'll miss her? When she gets back, do you talk about how much you missed her when she was gone? "

the day or two before she goes I remind her and say "guess where you get to go this weekend? to your daddys house! are you excited? what do you think you'll do this time?" etc etc.
when she gets home I tell her I missed her.

I know I have to let her go, it just sucks.
he doesn't let her call home, the first two weekends she came home and was screaming and crying because her "peepee" hurt. last time she told me she didn't want to go because he was mean to her, but then on the day he was coming to get her she changed her mind.
she's said a few off things but she changes what she says so frequently that I don't know exactly what to think of it.

Quoting JiLLiAN.:" yes, because it's court ordered. they don't give a smurf what your kid thinks until they're around 12 years old."

really? geeze that sucks

Quoting BαƚMαɳ:" It took my son awhile to get used to it so he would cry and scream anytime he would have to go. That ... [snip!] ... happening after a few months I would bring it up with your daughters father and figure out a way to make it easier on her."

she doesn't cry and scream thank goodness. she will just randomly tell me how much she doesn't want to go there again. like in the middle of eating dinner or something.
she says she wants to just visit and not sleep over

Quoting Dallas ♥ Isla:" she doesn't cry and scream thank goodness. she will just randomly tell me how much she doesn't want ... [snip!] ... want to go there again. like in the middle of eating dinner or something. she says she wants to just visit and not sleep over"

Give her time. I know it's really hard but I am sure she will get over it  

Quoting Dallas ♥ Isla:" really? geeze that sucks"

yep. i had pages and pages of irresponsible smurf that BD does and how he doesn't appropriately dress or bathe LO and he ended up getting an extra day  

I am my 5 year old son's "Weekend Parent".

Sometimes it's a fight to get him to come to my house. He wants to play with his toys, or he's tired, or he just is being onery. We always make him go anyways, because I know that as soon as he gets to my house he is excited and happy to be here. He also does the same when I have to take him home on Sundays. He wants to stay with me and not go home to his daddy, even though he loves BOTH of us dearly, he just doesn't want to leave sometimes.