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Sound like you need that counseling. Go anyway girlie. You need to find a way to forgive yourself and then work on forgiving your so. If you can't forgive yourself you probably won't forgive him.

im sorry hun. maybe being able to talk about it will help more than you think. Good luck with everything, and remember the reasons why you did it in the first place.. You were trying to do what was best. HUGS

Quoting Mel & a girl named Pey:"

you quoted her...

<blockquote><b>Quoting ☮ Phuket:</b>" you quoted her..."</blockquote>




Oops forgot editing!

Coming from a woman who has had two for medical purposes you need to learn how to move on. I know thats a bit harsh to say....but I can say that because it's been years since mine and I understand what it all means now.....I've experienced every emotion, I've fought with myself and my family over and over again.... Ive cried, screamed, laughed and cried again....... Forgive but don't forget.

And what I mean by forgive is, you need to learn how to forgive yourself. Make peace with yourself and then focus on everyone else after that.

When you learn how to forgive yourself, your life will change.

Hugs to you dear!!

You should go back to counseling. You need a safe place to get those emotions out.
You can't let it eat you up inside-you made the decision for a reason.

I just want to hug you.

I have no advice, but to say we are here for you.

I am going through similar at the moment, I understand how you feel completely, am here for you if you need to talk to someone who knows how you feel...

I think you should get help, it's hard to take the steps but we need help to get over what we've been through, its for the good of our children as well as for ourselves xx

Thanks ladies, I have been to counselling a feel times but I find myself forgetting about my appointment which isnt like me then I realize its because I dont wanna talk about things, within the last week I have been having a really hard time just have alot of anxiety attacks and me and my counselor have try'd to get in contact the past few days but because of the holidays it hasnt happened. I just wish I had listen to my gut...

Quoting *~Terra~*:" Coming from a woman who has had two for medical purposes you need to learn how to move on. I know thats ... [snip!] ... then focus on everyone else after that. When you learn how to forgive yourself, your life will change. Hugs to you dear!!"

Where did you begin?? I dont even know where to start, every time I open my mouth all that keeps coming out is I wanted to keep my baby... thats all I can say but its like a whisper.. I feel so broken.. When I was teenager I use to self harm and its been years since those thoughts have crossed my mind but just recently they have come back never in a million years did I ever think I would feel this broken..

The attacks could be from bottling this up. If you don't want to talk with her keep p posting on here or talk to Terra. I am very acquainted with her and she is a really awesome person. I hippie you find some peace.

Quoting Mel & a girl named Pey:" The attacks could be from bottling this up. If you don't want to talk with her keep p posting on here ... [snip!] ... on here or talk to Terra. I am very acquainted with her and she is a really awesome person. I hippie you find some peace."

me too, thank you...

<blockquote><b>Quoting Smokey_Taboo:</b>" me too, thank you... "</blockquote>




You're welcome...as someone who has lost 2 babies (not the same exactly but the feelings are similar and both hurt) my biggest advice and take it day to day. Take the good days and embrace them and find a way to get the icky feelings out on the bad ones. Poems, worrying, a good cry...anything that is an outlet for those feelings.

Quoting Smokey_Taboo:" Where did you begin?? I dont even know where to start, every time I open my mouth all that keeps coming ... [snip!] ... crossed my mind but just recently they have come back never in a million years did I ever think I would feel this broken.. "

I wish I could tell you where to start hun. It's different for everyone as we all deal with these emotions in different ways.

For me I needed to focus on ME and nobody else. So I started doing things for myself. Going to the gym, spending time at my friends horse farm scooping up horse pop lol.... (It was relaxing) I found songs that made me cry so hard so I could get it all out and I felt so much better after. I read a few books. Not really related to MY situation but about the loss of a child or something and it helped me realize that I'm not the only one out there who is dealing with pain on a daily basis.

Is there something that you enjoy doing by yourself or for yourself? Thats where I'd start!!

I think the fact that you came here looking for advice is a start as well.

There are images and memories that I WILL NEVER be able to erase from my memory. I've tucked them away though. I've shared them with a very very select few people. Your "friends" at home may not understand what you are feeling. Then again, they might. So tread lightly with them. Those who want to be there for you will.

And Melissa is right, I am pretty awsome... ha ha ha

What I'm going to tell you may be weird. BUT... another thing that helped me was being there for women like you who also went through it.