Out of control four year old...

ok, i'm re-iterating how I phrased this earlier... no hate, plz. I am NOT abusive, but I do spank my son if he needs it. I'm 11 weeks pregnant, and for the last couple of days (especially today...) he's been absolutely horrible. I've gotten so stressed about it, I've about crossed the line a couple of times. I didn't but almost have. Again, I STRESS to you, I am NOT abusive. Never once have I ever left a mark on my son, and never will I either. I've tried time out, taking toys away, taking TV away... I try to do little arts and crafts, even with him. But some days, I just don't have the energy for it. I do lose my patience, but I walk away when I feel like I'm crossing a line. It's even gotten to where he even asks to go to bed when I tell him he's going to bed as punishment and I change my mind on it. (which, I just make him go to his room and sit on his bed for about 5 minutes maybe and let him think about it...) Any suggestions (along with the ones I've received so far...)

You are a crazy abuser! Spanked him till you cant anymore? Time out till hes on his knees? Are you smurfing kidding me?!

You need to quit having temper tantrums and read "1-2-3 magic".

Is he bored? Does he go to school? Have any friends?

Quoting *J*:" You are a crazy abuser! Spanked him till you cant anymore? Time out till hes on his knees? Are you smurfing kidding me?! You need to quit having temper tantrums and read "1-2-3 magic"."

 

Quoting *J*:" You are a crazy abuser! Spanked him till you cant anymore? Time out till hes on his knees? Are you smurfing kidding me?! You need to quit having temper tantrums and read "1-2-3 magic"."

 

Find out WHY he's acting out. WHY he isn't behaving.

at 4...he can communicate his wants and needs.

Has he been getting adequate outside play lately? my kids act up when they're bored & have built up energy.

I think you are overdoing it with his punishment, and the fact that you're pregnant alone can make him act out. Mix that with your impatience and there you have it.

<blockquote><b>Quoting *J*:</b>" You are a crazy abuser! Spanked him till you cant anymore? Time out till hes on his knees? Are you smurfing kidding me?! You need to quit having temper tantrums and read "1-2-3 magic"."</blockquote>

i was thinking she's tired of spanking him & timeouts bc they're OBVIOUSLY not working.

Quoting *J*:" You are a crazy abuser! Spanked him till you cant anymore? Time out till hes on his knees? Are you smurfing kidding me?! You need to quit having temper tantrums and read "1-2-3 magic"."

I don't mean it the way it sounds. I am NOT abusive, do not EVER accuse me of abuse!!! I'm not having a temper tantrum, just wanting him to mind. I know when to stop. I spank him until I know I have to stop, which is before I do any harm.

Is there any reason why he acts the way he does? Why don't you talk to him and see what he has to say about his behavior before you take away toys and spanking. I am all for spanking as discipline but it needs to be in the proper context like in putting a screwdriver in an electrical socket. A dangerous situation.

Try a different approach. Positive reinforcement. Ignore the bad behavior completely as hard as it may be. When he behaves then comment on it and give praise for making the right choice. Another way is get two jars. Fill one with marbles and label the other one with tape and what he gets at each level of marbles. When he behaves well he gets a marble and when he misbehaves he gets one taken away. At the first line on the jar he gets a treat like icecream or something small. The second one he gets a bigger treat like a $10 toy. When he fills up the jar he gets a big treat like a special trip or a bigger toy.

There are many different ways to reinforce the positive to over rule the negative without timeout or spanking.

Quoting Angeleyes1372:" I don't mean it the way it sounds. I am NOT abusive, do not EVER accuse me of abuse!!! I'm not having ... [snip!] ... just wanting him to mind. I know when to stop. I spank him until I know I have to stop, which is before I do any harm. "

Why would you spank him more than once at a time?  

Quoting i made a vagina.:" <blockquote><b>Quoting *J*:</b>" You are a crazy abuser! Spanked him till you cant ... [snip!] ... "1-2-3 magic"."</blockquote> i was thinking she's tired of spanking him & timeouts bc they're OBVIOUSLY not working."

exactly what I'm saying. So not abusive.... smh...

<blockquote><b>Quoting Angeleyes1372:</b>" I don't mean it the way it sounds. I am NOT abusive, do not EVER accuse me of abuse!!! I'm not having ... [snip!] ... just wanting him to mind. I know when to stop. I spank him until I know I have to stop, which is before I do any harm. "</blockquote>



..so you spank repeatedly for the same punishment?!  

Quoting Supafly★:" Why would you spank him more than once at a time?  "

This is what I'm wondering... You're making it sound like your laying into him over and over...

<blockquote><b>Quoting Supafly★:</b>" Why would you spank him more than once at a time?  "</blockquote>