This is so horrible!!!

I seriously hate PPD right now more than ever.. I'm being treated. I've made a post about it recently this is my 3rd day on Zoloft. But tonight I'm having a panic attack. Nobody is around to talk to, except my son sleeping but he is not up to talk lol. I hate these images and these fears. I heard about a women who had a fear of molesting her child, and now I'm all thinking, "would I do that?" and obsessing over it. Now i wonder do I kiss him to much, hold him to much? I know I don't I just love cuddling with him because I love him so much. I hate these fears. It's keeping me up making me feel like a weirdo.

It's a horrible thing PPD but hopefully the Zoloft will take effect soon! I wish there was something more I could do or say but just know it gets better! ;) and there is nothing wrong with loving and showing affection to your bub! Chin up mumma!

No please don't feel bad this is a normal part of PPD. I went through those horrible thoughts as well I also use to think about accidents I could cause and just get major anxiety about it, mostly at night when I went to bed. Hang in there sweetie because in just a few more days those pills will start kicking in and you'll only go up from there. Lots of love xo

Quoting Lalasmooch:" No please don't feel bad this is a normal part of PPD. I went through those horrible thoughts as well ... [snip!] ... sweetie because in just a few more days those pills will start kicking in and you'll only go up from there. Lots of love xo"

Thanks. I feel like im about to cry my eyes out right now. I keep thinking of anything and everything I've ever done in my life that could make these fears into truths. Its hard because I keep thinking of things I've done in my life that were wrong. And if I did those things could I do this? It's horrible. I just want to be ok. The drug has my mind so foggy too right now. I think it's throwing me into a panic attack because I'm not used to the drug yet. ugh   I'm sorry. It's just so difficult. It's hard enough having PPD and the thoughts. But then to feel like every bad memory of your past, or past mistakes being called to mind is just so hard. I want to turn my mind off. But I just cant