Am I making it too easy for him?

My bd and I had a bad breakup about a month ago.we were living together, I changed the locks on him, he held onto my stuff, he yelled at my grandmother, just a whole mess. That lasted for about a week and we both realized we were being spiteful. He gave me my things and moved out. I've been doing good on my own, I finally feel comfortable to sleep in my apartment by myself . We were communicating through his sister so he could see his daughter. Everything was going okay and i finally was starting to feel less hurt and alone. We have a mutual friend who had a party at her house and I saw him there. We both were drunk and things went a little further than they should have😦. The next morning he stayed instead of leaving and it was like we never broke up. He picked our daughter that morning brought her home and stayed with us. It's been like this since Saturday. I don't want him to feel things are back to normal because they aren't. But then again I like the fact that we could be a family again. He is doing all the things and my daughter seems happier. But I know he will go back to being a smurf as soon as I let him back in. All my friends keep telling me that I never fully broke up with him before and this time he saw I was serious. I need to show him I'm in control but my heart folds for this man when I see him. It feels like I built up all that strength for a month for nothing. Every time I try and tell him we are not together, he starts saying why do I want things to be difficult but he hasn't said we are back together neither. Any advice. So confused and hurt.

This sucks for you.
As hard as it is, it's not back to normal and he isn't saying that you are together or trying to make up with you, for you, etc. Where and who is he living with? Is it just easier to stay with you because he doens't like where he's living?

It depends on what happened during your breakup. But something you should think about is if you were starting to get over him in less then a month, then do you truly want to be back with him?

<blockquote><b>Quoting ***KELLZ***:</b>" My bd and I had a bad breakup about a month ago.we were living together, I changed the locks on him, ... [snip!] ... saying why do I want things to be difficult but he hasn't said we are back together neither. Any advice. So confused and hurt."</blockquote>




It's weird but my mom has does this with her current bf for the past 5 years she breaks up with him then when they start talkin and with in like a weeks there moving in ..... She leaves him cause of his problems and controls ppl ...but keeps takin him back easy .... Honestly I think if you guys broke up for a reason you really should just get back together like nothing happened cause then nothing is solved ! Try things slow if you wanna get back together maybe counselling to help figure out what's he's feeling and why's he's an "smurf"

<blockquote><b>Quoting Shari Hogan:</b>" This sucks for you. As hard as it is, it's not back to normal and he isn't saying that you are together ... [snip!] ... for you, etc. Where and who is he living with? Is it just easier to stay with you because he doens't like where he's living?"</blockquote>
No he is back with his mother and she totally spoils him so I know he comfortable home.

<blockquote><b>Quoting Tiffany Knickerbocker:</b>" It depends on what happened during your breakup. But something you should think about is if you were starting to get over him in less then a month, then do you truly want to be back with him?"</blockquote>


It's been a month, 3 weeks and 2 days and I felt every bit of it. I was just starting to be able to sleep at night. I wasn't so sad in the morning and I started partying with my friends a lot which was bad because I ended up seeing him at a party. But I was finally starting to see the light..lol

Well wounds do heal. I can tell you from experience that being left in the "I don't know what he is thinking" state makes you crazy. My ex did this to me to the point I couldn't hardly think straight. I walked away from him after we had been together for five years and two babies later and my life is so much better now. I know I went through a year of pure hell trying to figure out if i did the right thing when I left him because my oldest was only 7 months and i was 3 months pregnant with my daughter when I did. But loooking back I made the right choice   I have a husband who is good to me and accepts my older two as his own and now we are expecting our first together. My point is life goes on.

<blockquote><b>Quoting Tiffany Knickerbocker:</b>" Well wounds do heal. I can tell you from experience that being left in the "I don't know what he is thinking" ... [snip!] ... who is good to me and accepts my older two as his own and now we are expecting our first together. My point is life goes on."</blockquote>



Yeah I know, wish I could see that now but All I can think about is him..smh