4 year old and Behavioral Problems in School?

My 4 year old is in Junior Kindergarten. Since day one he has been having some issues in school. In the start it was a note everyday. Now it's every once in a while. He has been to the principles office maybe 3 times now.


He seems to be having a hard time with his emotions. When he gets angry he has a tantrum and will yell or hit is leg. If someone else is making him angry or doing something to irritate him, he ends up pushing them or grabbing their arms.


I'm not sure where to go with all of this. The teacher says when he is like this he gets sent to the office or is put in time out.


Im starting to feel like he is too young to be in school full time. Before school he wasn't like this and once he started school everything shifted. His behavior is horrid. We are working so hard to try and get things back on track with him but he just seems to be getting so frustrated with everything.

" The teacher says when he is like this he gets sent to the office or is put in time out."

Of course. I mean, he's only 4   Some kids do not respond to certain types of discipline. My Son is one of them. We have to do it very gently as in as little "punishment" as possible and more of getting down to a solution to resolve the issue. Or else he gets very emotional.

Maybe he's acting out because he doesn't want to be there. Or maybe its a phase. Sadly I don't think pulling him out would help really either?

I don't think pulling him out is the problem because then he will think that that's all he has to do to get out of school/ get his way in the future

hes four hes going to act out sometimes use the same discilpline at home thats used at school keep in constant contact with his teacher and if he misbehaves in school then hes in trouble at home to early bedtime no tv or if he has a toy he values he doesnt get to play with it that night he needs to know that behavior is not acceptable does he have an area at school he can go to and calm down? talk to his teacher about having a small areas he can use to cool down if he gets mad upset or whatever try a treasure chest at home if hes good at school he gets a treat from the treasure chest (stickers little toys bouncey balls tattoes)

That's pretty normal. If he just started his going to have his up and downs. You'll just have to work with him to correct the behavior when he gets out of hand.

I went thru the same thing with my son in preschool, he's 6 and a 1st grader now. He still has hard days but his school has a great plan set up for him to recognize his triggers and help him before he has a full blown meltdown. But it started right after the divorce of his father & I, did you have a major change around the time it started besides just starting school?

Quoting Melissa J. B.:" I went thru the same thing with my son in preschool, he's 6 and a 1st grader now. He still has hard days ... [snip!] ... after the divorce of his father & I, did you have a major change around the time it started besides just starting school?"

We moved twice in 2 months.

That can definitely cause them to act out, even positive change is sometimes too much for them to process. I don't know what state you're in, but I'm in CA and we have a program called Triple P Positive Parenting through the County that was free. They even came to our house to make it easier, once a week and worked with my son and with us on the best ways to redirect and discipline. It made a huge difference for our son.

Quoting C'est La Vie♡:" My 4 year old is in Junior Kindergarten. Since day one he has been having some issues in school. In the ... [snip!] ... are working so hard to try and get things back on track with him but he just seems to be getting so frustrated with everything."

Dont pull him out. That will make it worse IMO.

Maybe he is just tired and school. Some kids cant deal with the long days of school. Was he in daycare or anything before school?

i wouldn't pull him out; you'll just go through it all again when he starts another school/kindergarten.

He was in daycare when he was younger for about 3 months before we moved to another country. He loves school and the kids but he just has his days.

I would make a reward system that allows him a treat if he behaves! Something small but that he could look forward to.

But, I would talk to the teacher and tell her the plan and make sure that a "good day" is in his reach! I don't like it when teachers feel the need to tell me every single bad thing my kid has done. I teach 4's and I rarely tell a parent a child has had a bad day.

Quoting Holly and girls!:" I would make a reward system that allows him a treat if he behaves! Something small but that he could ... [snip!] ... the need to tell me every single bad thing my kid has done. I teach 4's and I rarely tell a parent a child has had a bad day."

We tried to ask her to give us a positive note once in a while and she said she doesn't hve time to do it. BULLLLLLSmurf. If you can write out a page full of negative you have time to give a little positive!