Something to say about regret

If you read this thank you. Maybe it will help you but I think it’s more to help me

When I decided to have my abortion I was not very worried or sacred or 'attached" I knew it was right for me. I had no kids yet and was not planning on any. I had the money and the life to support a baby; I just did not want one. It was an accident so I just wanted to undo it.

I thought it was smart to do some research on it while I waited for my appointment. That I made on a Friday and had to stay pregnant until a Monday. UGH I was so sick I could not even think of feeling this way for 9 months just to end up with a KID! Not what I wanted.

So I wanted to read up on what it was like for others and in my "research" all I found was story after story of regret!(I did not know of Baby GAGA yet) I started to think the pages I was reading were from religious groups or something. I did not think all women could have such regret! I mean seriously... how could all these people feel like I did (Sure that they did not want this at all) and then suddenly be all pro life? I wanted to get an idea of what it was going to be like but I felt everything I read must have been from some "religious, pro lifers".

Moving on I had the procedure and it was not the best experience of my life but I was so happy to be done, to be feeling better and to get my life back on track.

Then it started...slowly, regret. It started to sneak into my day. Everyday a little more. More and more regret. I could not understand it. I didn't want a kid; I don't believe in a god, I never felt any type of attachment, so why was I feeling so sad? So much regret? Why did I now want my baby back? I decided that it was my hormones and that in a month I would feel better.

But no, I felt worse as each day went on. I named her thinking it would help. I talked to her. I talked to the Dad. I was a broken person who now knew that all the stories of regret were not fake they were not from women who were pro-lifers trying to keep people from abortions. They were just normal woman like me who were experiencing a pain so bad that they needed to shear it with people. They wanted to help people not make the same mistake.
So I wrote this today hoping to help you not haven the same regret that I and so many women live with. Just so you know that it is true, average women who are not “pro-life fanatics” who are not “religious” and who don’t even want kids feel strong regret after abortions. I am hoping I can help someone not have to live with this awful regret.

I had an abortion. It was a wanted baby but I sort of went psycho because I lost my job right after I found out I was pregnant and decided that it would be the better choice. It haunted me for a long time. Not so much now that I have my two boys but I wonder what if, KWIM? I no longer regret that choice but I did up until the day my oldest was born.

Sorry to hear about the regret you felt/feel   but in the long run you made the right decision for you.

Quoting brooke_x:" Sorry to hear about the regret you felt/feel   but in the long run you made the right decision for you. "

We are really happy now because we actuly TTC right after that and had a baby about a year after the procedure. So as soon as I got pregnant I felt better. But I was just thinking about it today and how I never thought I would regret it at all. So for the women who think they might regret the decision. I want to tell them my story just so they know that it can happen. Just make sure to think about it even if you don't think the baby is for you. Sometimes abortions are the right thing but sometimes the regret is so bad that the abortion dose not fix the problem

Well I think its great of you to share your story in the want of trying to help others. I think that's very brave of you, !

Quoting brooke_x:" Well I think its great of you to share your story in the want of trying to help others. I think that's very brave of you, !"

Thank you

i'm thinking of getting an abortion. Until now I've been pro-life and I'm honestly not sure I could really go through with it but my current job and living situation is making me feel incapable of having another child. Yet, when I look at my daughter I just think it might be worth the struggle. Has anyone had one after they already had a child or children? ..Did the "regret" ever go away?

I'm sorry to hear about the regret you feel. I understand it too I have been there it's only natural. But we just have to remind ourselves that we did it for the reasons we thought right at the time and try to keep a lid on any "regret" we feel.

I just answered another thread about regret; i have had 2 abortions and felt regret MANY times, but i do not believe it is TRUE regret. i feel it is some natural instinctive womanhood/motherhood thing kicking in and is very powerful to fight!

I hope that i n time you will feel better... try counselling if you havent already? x

Quoting pixie b:" I'm sorry to hear about the regret you feel. I understand it too I have been there it's only natural. ... [snip!] ... in and is very powerful to fight! I hope that i n time you will feel better... try counselling if you havent already? x"

I think what you said makes since, the natural instinct thing. I don't worry about it anymore but I did until I conceived. I guess today it was just on my mind. You know how much it upset me even thought I did not even want a baby