re: No one is throwing me a shower?

Quoting HopingforaMiracle:" <blockquote><b>Quoting Just Ames:</b>" I could never throw myself a shower. "</blockquote> I agree, if nobody threw me one I wouldn't have one"

I would have a difficult time affording to go out and buy the rest of the things I need. We were doing great financially and it wouldn't have been an issue, but my husband got laid off and we used ALL our savings on just paying our bills. We're catching up now, but I don't have spending money. It isn't like I had a baby without being able to afford it, it's just that life threw a curveball and we just have to go with it and get through it.

I had a "baby BBQ" no we didn't cook baby's.... Chicken hot dogs burgers... That way boys, girls, kids could all come and feel comfortable. It was nice.... And I went to my moms for it... But pretty much through it
Myself....

Quoting Asacia Norris:" If you don't want to throw your own shower, maybe your boss or a coworker would allow you to place their ... [snip!] ... invite? You could do all the planning and prep and nobody would have to know it was you as long as the host were to attend. "

I'm a stay at home mom, I don't have a boss or a co-worker to throw me one. My last place of employment was a training stable for Arabian Horses, and I literally had two co workers, one of which was a guy, and other other was my best friend who now lives very far away.

  Poo....

Quoting **Kiddy Kat**:" I had a "baby BBQ" no we didn't cook baby's.... Chicken hot dogs burgers... That way boys, girls, kids ... [snip!] ... kids could all come and feel comfortable. It was nice.... And I went to my moms for it... But pretty much through it Myself...."

That's kind of what I was thinking of doing, and I was kind of asking around for someone who would kind of help host it for me, without trying to pressure someone into doing the whole thing themselves. I wanted to have a simple, casual gathering that is more of a celebration than a traditional shower. I'm big on entertaining and doing potlucks because it's fun. I just know that no one else will do it for me.

<blockquote><b>Quoting Megan Keyser:</b>" I would have a difficult time affording to go out and buy the rest of the things I need. We were doing ... [snip!] ... baby without being able to afford it, it's just that life threw a curveball and we just have to go with it and get through it. "</blockquote>


I was just saying what I would do in this situation. You can throw one that's up to you.  

Quoting Asacia Norris:"   Poo...."

I was kind of asking around with my not-quite-as-close friends though to see if someone might co-host for me, and that's when I got told I was greedy and tacky. lol. I just felt that if I didn't kind of encourage someone to help that no one would. No one did with my son, but luckily my mom agreed to "co-host" that time so it didn't look like it was all me.

You said in your OP you had a mother in law, are you married? Maybe your SO could throw you shower for you and your friends?

Quoting Asacia Norris:" You said in your OP you had a mother in law, are you married? Maybe your SO could throw you shower for you and your friends?"

Haha, that'd be a sight.   The image of my hubby attempting to throw a baby celebration is kind of entertaining. I don't know if he's really the type. He's super laid back and probably wouldn't know where to start. It's an idea though, I could certainly bring it up and see how he felt about it.

My moms a stupid drug addict, and my sisters can't be in the same room, as well as one of them can barely take care of herself at almost 28. My friends are my age or younger 18-19 and not as lucky to be in a stable situation like me. My boyfriend and I got everything we needed on our own. My oldest sister took me out shopping to get the rest of the baby clothes I needed. But we got everything else on our own. It sucks to have a lack of a group, that most women get when they're pregnant. But a lot of women anymore, don't. Throw yourself one. you don't have to ask for gifts. It sounds like you just want to have a baby shower.   No problem there to me.

I think its tacky to throw your own. Always have and always will. If someone came to you and said I would like to throw you a shower but would like to help plan and such then go for it. If the concern is needing small stuff and not being able to afford it then why spend money on a shower? There is no guarantee that you will get all the things you still need. So then you are out money for the shower and still have to go buy things.

If my hubby threw it though, the people who are calling me tacky would probably still call me tacky.   Oh well, I guess I need to grow a thicker skin and not worry about it.

Quoting Jennybananna:" I think its tacky to throw your own. Always have and always will. If someone came to you and said I would ... [snip!] ... that you will get all the things you still need. So then you are out money for the shower and still have to go buy things. "

I'm the master at entertaining at a very low cost, I was going to have it at my home and prepare food myself that was yummy but not expensive. My entire wedding, ceremony and reception cost only just over $1,000 including a cake, my dress, and decorations.   So the money involved in throwing a celebration isn't really an issue for me because I wouldn't bother with expensive decorations and favors. Instead, I'd be likely to do the invites myself (I'm an artist) and just stick to cooking myself without spending much.

It's just that the little stuff I need adds up. I've bought a lot of clothing here and there, mostly clearance and second hand. I still things that would cost me a lot to just go out and splurge. I literally just came out of a situation where we would have lost our house if not for the help of my parents, and we're just recovering and catching up on bills. I just don't have the money to go and get everything else I need. I don't care if people judge me and thing I just didn't "plan for the baby well enough" or whatever. Life happened, and I went from being very comfortable to a very financially stressful situation. I don't expect people to feel sorry for me, but it will take some time to recover from draining our savings.

Quoting Megan Keyser:" I'm the master at entertaining at a very low cost, I was going to have it at my home and prepare food ... [snip!] ... Instead, I'd be likely to do the invites myself (I'm an artist) and just stick to cooking myself without spending much. "

Still costs money that you could just be using to buy what the baby needs. If you just want to celebrate the baby then throw a meet the baby the party but yes I think its tacky to throw your own. If your SO or DH did it as like a surprise type thing that would be amazingly sweet. Thats just how I was raised.