Aggrivated: Taken advantage by friend.

I need some advice on how to handle a situation. I don't want to blow my top and go storming through an argument and loose a friendship that for the most part has been a wonderful relationship....

Yesterday a friend of mine called and asked if I could watch their 3 year old son for maybe 2 or 3 hours while he went to go help some family move. I asked how the boy was behaving that day so far because our son had just started his ADHD medicine and I didn't know how the two of them would behave and I was assured he'd been having a good day and that he would be back ASAP, just was going to help unload a truck for a bit. Well he has helped us in a pinch here and there and I hate to tell a friend no so even though I am on bed rest and stuck to the couch, I asked hubby what he thought - if it would be alright. Hubby has off on the weekend and said that he had no problem watching the little guy so that our friend could go handle some stuff.

Well the child was absolute hell on wheels, BEYOND terrible. Refused under any circumstances to listen to either myself or DH, was hitting, throwing things, told us NO, you can't make me over and over. I called his wife's phone to ask her if she had the number for where the guy was - we were under the impression that she was at work and that was the reason we took the little boy so that he could go do whatever. She wasn't. She was at home in bed. We live right down the street from each other. She works at the corner of our street. She had NOT worked the night before and didn't have to work until 4pm that day. So while we were struggling with her child from 11:30 until almost 4pm she was in bed sleeping "because she had to work" ......... wtf...... I don't necessarily blame the guy, he doesn't wear the pants in that relationship AT ALL, but I am totally in shock that she had him call me, while I am on bedrest to watch her child when she wasn't even at work!

If she had taken him herself than brought him to me at like 2:30 so she had some time to shower, take a nap, whatever for work I would have been ok ... but for you to juts hand off your kid to me so you could sleep all day? And then when I call at 2:30 to tell you that your son is being very, very naughty and that I am having a hard time....to instead of at least ask to speak with your child, or preferably come get your child, you tell me "oh..I'll go ahead and call hubby and have him call you"..

I don't know how to handle this. I don't wanna blow up and loose some friends that have been good friends in the past - but I feel taken advantage of and very disrespected. Any advice, please?

i would just say no next time. if i didn't want to lose my friend, i would just say that he wasn't behaving very well that day. and then if he asks another time, just say no, that you're busy or need to rest or whatever.

let the know their kid doesnt listen at all and its hard when your BED REST and dont want to do it when the mom is perfectly capable of getting her ass up..

i work at 530 in the morning and im up mulitple times in the night with the kids and i still dont have anyone ever do that.. she is alzy

Quoting máthair draíocht:" I need some advice on how to handle a situation. I don't want to blow my top and go storming through ... [snip!] ... some friends that have been good friends in the past - but I feel taken advantage of and very disrespected. Any advice, please?"

wow.... I'd lay the law down and tell her to get off her lazy ass and parent her kid so he isn't a spawn of hell and to ya know, be a smurfing parent. I cant stand parents like that,"Yeah watch my hellish kid so I can sit on my ass and not do smurf." Damn she would piss me off if I were you!

Its like, I feel like she took advantage of the fact I'm a nice person. I really do love the little monster and sometimes he can be a great kid - but he is 3. He's still in that "terrible 2's " stage and once he starts having a bad day its like you just can't shake him out of it. I just wish SHE had respected me more.   Hubby is pissed. Says that was bullsmurf and wants to tell them off but its just not really in my nature. I know we won't be watching him anytime soon thats for sure.

Honestly he couldve been acting fine at home. Sometimes my 3 year old is fine and when we leave the house he turns into a monster. I wouldn't really stress the fact that his kid was being a monster...that sux to hear so bad. Maybe she has some kind of sickness going on or something. sometimes me and DH "take turns" on the weekend...I get to sleep in one day he gets to sleep in the next. So if he wanted to get something done it would be his place to find someone to watch the kids ( I seriously only "sleep in" until like 9....but on occassion I have slept until 11). If I were you I would kind of look at it as a lesson learned....next time just say no...or ask where his mom is in case of emergency or something.

Personally, I'd just say no next time. You paid your dues in "returning the favor" to your friends, so smurf watching him again. Just tell him if they ever want you to watch the kid again, they need to tell him that he needs to behave.